December 18, 2005

Christmas time is here

Our big tree is up! It looks so pretty. The last three ornaments we put on were from Disney World last January. God, I loved that vacation so much. I loved Disney so much. It was wonderful.

I can't believe it's only a week until Christmas. That's just crazy. I have one more gift to buy, and it's actually C's birthday present. Not bad. Well, and stocking stuffers for mom and dad. I'll get those in town on Monday or Tuesday.

Sesa continues. I'm over 2000 words now, double the limit, but it just wont' END. I really like it, though, and hope my person does to. I think it's turning out well, I just want it finished. I have until Tuesday ay 2am, though. LOL

GREs and transcripts are on their ways to my 4 graduate schools, and I refuse to worry about any other part of applying until January.

I wanna Sim and not write. ::whimper::

November 16, 2005

happy happy joy joy

Today is a good day. A very good day. I don't care that Noneck lost her mind and shrieked most of the day. I don't care that the rest of the kids joined her. I don't care that I'm joining SGA just as that one special person has asked Joe Flanigan about slash and the fandom has erupted. I don't care.

It's snowing! It snowed overnight, lightly, just enough to stay on and dust the tops of roofs and cars and such, but not the ground. All morning, little flurries have been swirling, blown every which way by the wind. Snow! The first of the season. So I came home and walked to Starbucks for a peppermint white hot chocolate for me, and a gingerbread latte for mom. It was a great walk, chilly and gorgeous. Snow!

Also, my autumn BPAL came. Yay sniffies! Yay!

Now to put up my blue and silver snowflake garland before work.

October 18, 2005

tra la la

Last night's Astros game was *heartbreaking.* Gah, to lose the lead in the top of the 9th, 1 out from the World Series. Ouch.

I finally got the VMars S1 DVDs this weekend and OMG I am so addicited. It's brilliant. Just a bitch to come in mid season, like I tried. I'm loving S2, though, and S1 is a delight, so it's all good now. All hail TV on DVD.

I still enjoy my library job, even if I did have to search dumpsters last night. Argh.

I'm sitting with C tonight, so I'm bringing along my VMars and watching some after she's asleep. It should, I hope, keep me awake when I am very very tired. One of these nights, I need to turn off the damn computer and get a good night's sleep.

October 06, 2005

NaNo NaNo

My desktop is fixed! YAY! Geek Squad came out yesterday, swapped power sources, apologized and went on his merry way. Bliss.

I am so into Veronica Mars this season. I downloaded the theme song...kickass.

I love my job. I love it with the power of 1000 burning suns. Yay jobs that let me get paid for reading and playing with computers! It's bliss.

Given that this job is so quiet at night, I think I'm going to join NaNoWriMo. I've always kind of wanted to do it. So this weekend I'll finish up (and, uh, start) my HP fic due Monday and then start plotting out My Very First Crappy Novel. Whoo!

Apparently I'm in a cheerful mood. It must also be the Wiggles song I downloaded and am listening to. Hot potato!

October 02, 2005

new beginnings

15 posts in September. That's the most since May 2003. Go, me! Of course, I think I'm the only one reading them, but oh well. LOL

I start my life as a librarian tomorrow. Wheeee! I'm not even nervous. That, I'm sure, will come later, when I've found out all that I need to do as a librarian. LOL I like my schedule, though - I get Tuesday/Thursday/Friday afternoons and evenings off, and the entire weekend off every other week. It's going to work well for me, even if Monday and Wednesdays will feel long. I still have 3 hours between jobs on those days. Plenty of time for a walk or just relaxing.

Tonight, I wish to watch WENN. I miss that show something fierce. I finished a HP story last night (9 days before it was due!!! A new record!!) and now have 8 days to finish the second one I signed up for. LOL That will be 3 stories this year, then, plus the SeSa I plan to write. That's one more than last year, which is one more than the year before. Go, me!

September 23, 2005

Boredom Slayer

As is happening far too often, I AM BORED. Out of my ever loving mind. Jennie is off being an evacuee in Texas with no phone connection, Biz has her standard Friday night plans and there's still an hour before the premiere of Numb3rs. I have no one to talk to!

(Not to sound callous about Jennie, because Lord knows I've worried about her, but she's safe in SA with family and her apt seems to be out of the line of danger as well.)

I spent money today! And shall see the results in 6-8 weeks. See below for my BPAL goodies. Meanwhile, below are the shoes that will be my next purchase:Pretty Gritty.

I've never had cause to wear pumps before, as I tend to work with 3-8 year olds and need to be able to do gym class and run around chasing them, but these will come in handy for job interviews or working in a library. I shall feel quite Lorelai-ish in them.

Continue reading "Boredom Slayer" »

September 21, 2005

19,203 to go

I deleted all of the 2000 spam trackbacks, and 10,000 of the 29,000 spam comments. Whew. This'll take a while to get perfect. LOL

I love summertime, but this 10 weeks of no paychecks thing is murder. I've been super good and not spent any money from my checking account the last 3 weeks except for the Sims2 Nightlife game, a planned purchase. I turn in my first timesheet tomorrow, so I'm only 2 weeks from getting paid again. It's a paltry amount, but will double my bank account, I believe. I'm very excited. I miss buying things. I have such a yen to go to Old Navy and the Gap. And Sephora! OMG and Aerosoles...I NEED NEW SHOES. In the way that I desperately want new shoes and don't need them at all. I want to buy things!!! Ack. Maybe I can hit Old Navy this weekend, I know I have $50 of gift cards. Actually, I bet Gap would take them, too, since it's the same company. Hmmm.

I was debating how to handle Lost vs. Veronica Mars premiere's this week. Then I realized that Veronica starts next week and CBS is showing Grave Danger, CSI's finale, tonight. Bye Bye Lost. No competition here. I can't wait to see it again. I saw it in May, but didn't remember the characters as much as I should have. Then I lost it in TiVo accident #3 and while I saw bits of it on my computer, it lacks the punch of TV. Eeeeeee, sad scary Nicky!in!A!Box!

September 10, 2005

QuickPost test

I never tried the QuickPost before. Looks like fun. As a test, these are the drapes I want to get for my room.

Decorating with Lace Lily of the Valley Pattern

New look

Welcome to the new Blue Roses! Krissy spent hours upgrading me and Kate to MT 3.2 and getting everything working nicely. This default won't stay for long...I envision fun colors coming <.g>...but looks how cool everything looks! I'm so excited. I'm going to play around and figure out other things I can do here too. Such fun!

Look, comments work again, too!

Meanwhile, I go back to playing around and learning the ropes. Wish me luck!!

September 03, 2005


Only one more week of summer vacation. Sigh. I can't believe it's already September. Everything flew by.

Still only partially employed, but hey, they gave me a raise.

Also with September comes my new TV watching schedule. This season, I think all I'm watching is Gilmore Girls, CSI and Numb3rs, with dashes of Alton Brown thrown in for good measure. There are shows I'd like to try (How I Met Your Mother, with Aly Hannigan, and Reunion, that murder mystery show where each epiosde is one year in the countdown to the high school reunion), but I believe they both conflict with other shows. I'd watch Stargate Atlantis and Firefly, except SciFi got put on digital cable, which I don't have in my room. So, it shall be a 3 show season. But what awesome 3 shows they are!

Kate and I are talking about upgrading to MT3.2, and paying for the personal license. We could use some of those features, like the blacklist and spam stuff, and getting our comments back. And poor Gen! She hasn't even been able to log in for a year. Yes, it's time to get a supported blog. LOL I shall assess my finances after my Sims 2 Nightlife payment goes through on September 15 and likely get it then.

I'm already planning my holiday cards for December. I love that time of year. LOL It's so much fun sending out cards, and it's doubly fun for me, since I like to send little craft-gifts inside. Last year I made paper snowflakes and painted them with sparkly paint. I have a pretty good idea of what I'm doing this year. I'll have to get everything once I get paid in October, because I think it'll take time to get it all done!

I love this time of year, too. It's been so deliciously cool and breezy lately. (Of course, much of that has to do with Katrina, which is heartbreaking. Any time there's a hurricane in the south east, IL gets great clear weather. Ouch.) Mom and I have already decorated the house for autumn. (I much prefer autumn to fall. It makes it seem so special.) The front room especially is quite cozy. Of course, with fall (this sentence deserves a 'fall') comes allergies and I can't actually smell anything or breathe, but it'll pass. Eventually. LOL

I must tend to my Trixie pup. Not a real one, sadly - I have Nintendogs now! I love Nintendogs. Trixie is my pug and she's the cutest thing ever. I've taught her some tricks, and she came in first in the beginners agility test. I'm so proud of her! Because it's on the DS system, I use my voice to train her and the touch screen to pet her. It's fantastic. So, off I go to "walk" her.

June 24, 2005

Summer in the city

Summer is here, and it seems to be a harbinger for a really excruiatingly hot summer. To make up for last year's super cool one? I'd just prefer a middle temp range.

I am employed through next June! For the first time in years, I know where I will be a year from now. Wild. I unexpectedly got a letter from Noneck's district, asking me to continue working with her next year. This is, of course, in addition to getting hired to work with her this summer, too. Guess they like me!

Everything proceeds apace. CSI addiction taking over the Gilmore one, which is still strong. Less than a month until the new HP, and the *NSYNC weekend. Very exciting. I'm spending time with C and her mom, and that's a joy. Noneck continues to delight me, even when I feel like pulling my hair out by the roots.

Tomorrow, it's off to Great America. Yay! Even with the horrific 100 degree heat, it'll prove a nice distraction for a few hours. And will be followed by relaxing in a nice hotel across the street from a fabulous outlet mall. Life is good, my friends, life is good.

May 01, 2005

10 days to Lead Awareness Day

Kate pointed out that my index page was blank again, so here I am. LOL

Happy May Day! I cannot believe how quickly this year has passed. I only have a month and a few days of work left. !!! How is that possible?? I feel like I just started. I don't know how much good I've done in pm work (not that I've done badly, either; it's just that he is doing SO well that I'm not sure how much was my support!), but my am She has come such a long way and I am so proud of her. I'm proud of both of them.

I need to e-mail boss lady and let her know I'd like to apply for summer work and next school work. I hope she hires me.

My room is taking shape again! I have just about all my books in, plus all my DVDs, and my *NSYNC Build-A-Bears and American Girl dolls. It's really cute and comfy in here. Beautiful Winnie has been a joy to play with every night AND TiVo works! Turns out you can't have your TiVo within four feet of your computers, or else the TiVo gets scrambled and dead. Every morning, I hold my breath as I turn on the TV, to see if it still works. So far, so good. <.g>

This year, C and her parents are coming over for cake on Lead Awareness Day! Closest I've come to a birthday party in about 8, 10 years. I'm excited. She's so cute and I love spending time with her and her family.

April 11, 2005

Oh, beloved TiVo

Oh, this is so not a good week. This weekend was spent trying to be cheery when really, all I wanted was to curl up and cry, and now. Now, my TiVo has left me.

I came up at 10:30 last night, intent on watching some of Desperate Housewives before bed. I turned on my TV - a new black and white screen saying, "Welcome. Powering up...." greeted me. It continued to greet me. I rebooted and unplugged things. Still with the same message. I thought maybe it was because I had moved my computer in the day before, and having two power strips in one outlet divided the electricity too much. I turned off my computer and unplugged the power strip and did the TiVo power cycle reboot again. Nothing.

Tried again tonight. Visited troubleshooting on the website, called tech support. I was told that all they could do was approve an exchange. I mail them my recorder, they mail me a new one.

A blank one. Because data cannot be saved. An entire season of Gilmore Girls that I hadn't moved to a highlights tape. Movies. Favorite scenes. Last year's Joan of Arcadia finale, which I thought was TV's finest hour. Chris Kirkpatrick on Fairly Odd Parents. My only Queer as Folk special, from VH1, cued up to Justin and Brian's prom dance. All my little tidbits I've saved over the last year for a little pick me up before bed. They are all gone. Poof. With the wind.

I would cry, except I'm too sad. It keeps trying to connect to TV, it's trying so hard! It seems like it's getting closer, but it can't make the connection.

I think I signed up for the burn it, I sent the e-mail, but my luck, it didn't get through. I'm afraid to play Sims, lest something new befall something I love. And that laptop I wanted for my birthday? Is it really worth the heartbreak that comes when technology fails?

April 09, 2005

I am alive, I swear

I hate when I go so long between posts that my index is blank! I used to be so good at making posts on nothing, but now...not so much.

There's just not much to talk about. I'm starting to make plans for next fall. Or, you know, think about plans. <.g> I am making plans for the summer - such as NSYNC's Challenge for the Children. I have 2 roommates and social activites lined up. This is of the Good.

I've been reading a lot lately. I went to Texas to spend time with Jennie. I desperately wish to get back to Disney World. I've been sick for 6 weeks and now my allergies are coming in, just as I was feeling better. I put on glitter lotion on my legs and the glitter decided to stay on my hands and bedspread and not my legs. I'm still wildly in love with the Gilmore Girls. I've begun a new art project. I listened to Yo Yo Ma play live on the radio last night. I've started walking to work. Copa Cabana just began playing on my iTunes. The people I spend the most time with, and therefore who are my main conversation partners, include a 3 year old girl who is functionally nonverbal and a 10 year old girl with significant speech challenges.

Such an interesting life I lead. ;)

Kymberlie of Neurotic Fishbowl is celebrating the Second Anniversary of Burn It. I do believe I'll join.

March 08, 2005

cold cold, cold cold cold

Sunday=65 degrees.
Monday am=50 degrees.
Monday pm=35 degrees.
Tuesday=25 degrees.
Tonight=12 degrees.

Spring is trying so hard to take over, but Winter has its claws in and will not move a moment before it decides it's done. Personally, I'm ready for spring. I want warmer temps and some nice thunderstorms.

A few hours ago, Karey IMed me that Mt. St. Helens erupted. I immediately went to CNN and saw Brian Litrell. Well. So I tried searching news outlets websites. Nothing. I realize it's not a huge horrible eruption, but I would think it is still more important than Brian Litrell and his past heart problems! National still isn't covering any of it, outside of a few mentions on the Weather Channel. I finally found a live stream from a local news channel.

So after ascertaining that national didn't have a thing, I grabbed my Mary Kay booklet and called Lady K to check on her. I am still greatly amused that I, the Chicagoan, was the one to call her and let her know that her mountain had erupted. <.g> But hey, that meant she was a-ok and it was lovely to talk with her on the phone. I can't even remember the last time we did that! We neither of us are big fans of the phone. <.g> But that was fun and a highlight of my day. : )

Mostly my days have been work and Sims. Emily and Charlie graduated summa cum laude and I'm quite proud of them. I took a fair number of pictures and I hope to post soon. It was fun. It was easy and hard - I had zero problems keeping them at a 4.0 gpa, but then again, neither socialized much. (Although they did both end up engaged by the time they moved out.) More graphics disappeared though - all job related ones and all memories. <.sigh> The wants and actions and memories are still there, just with empty boxes. I moved all my downloads out to see if there was a hack causing problems, but no. Now I have to put all the custom content back in - walls, floors, clothes, hair, etc. Oy with the poodles already.

Perhaps tonight I will buck tradition and go to bed at a reasonable hour when tired, as opposed to a far too late hour when I'm overtired.

December 23, 2004

catchup, darling

For some reason, I am quite wired tonight. 12:30, and I just can't bring myself to go to sleep. I'm wide awake!

Lots has gone on since I last posted. I went down to UIUC to visit the people in charge of the online library program. It was a nice visit, very informative, and I liked the people very much.

I started my morning job in the ECE. It's definitely going to be a challenge - 3 year olds are much, much, much different than 7 and 8 year olds. <.g> I'm not used to pre-preschool! Oy. But I think I'll get the hang of it all pretty quickly.

I did the training for the afternoon preschool job. I think I'm going to enjoy that one - everyone involved seems more on the ball than the other job.

Melissa and I went Christmas shopping. So much fun! We had lunch at Gabi - I love it there! It's Liss's favorite place to eat, so of course it had to be our lunch stop on her second day home. I had a cheeseburger with blue cheese and onion soup. She had steak and onion soup, and the Coffee Pot de Creme for dessert. Oh. My. God. You know those commercials where women are obsessively licking the dessert spoon clean and almost moaning in delight. That was me taking a bit of her dessert. Oh. It was coffee custard, topped with a light airy mousse. Oh. I'm smiling just thinking of it. LOL! I must must must get that again soon.

I wrote two stories this week. LOL All hail the sesa. LOL One was NSYNC, of course. My first SeSa request not JC/Chris. Sadness! I can't say what she asked for, just in case, but I'll post a link come New Year. I think it came out cute.

The other story was a gift for Jennie, Biz and Jess, and so it was Remember WENN. My first media story in....a very long time. LOL It's shorter than the NSYNC one, but I think just as cute. I'll post a link after Christmas.

Other than that....guess its been business as normal. The tree (a Tyra Banks model - tall and skinny) looks beautiful, although its currently only wearing lights. Still needs ornaments. My little American Girl tree is fully decorated, though, and very pretty.

204 days until Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince! ;)

November 11, 2004


I keep getting tons and tons of spam comments, and they all wind up in my inbox. I think I'm going to have to stop comment notifications. I get so few comments anyway, and maybe it'll mean I check my page more often.

Kate, do you get these too?

I'm feeling all wintery and such. Much fun! I'm writing two challenges this year - sesa, as always, and then a WENN one for Jennie, Biz and Jess. Wish me luck. LOL

October 19, 2004

simmy sims

My Sims aim to drive me nuts. Tonight, Lucy and Jem Blythe had twins. Twins! Emily and Charlie. I exited without saving three times, hoping against hope for a change. Nope. Twins. (I wonder if this has to do with woohooing/trying for a baby once or twice a day for a few days? They were pretty horny there for awhile.) The kicker is now, they both really really want 10 kids. TEN! Yeah, right. LOL

Watched Boston/NY for many hours tonight. Go Red Sox!

Damn, have to be up in 7 hours to head out to MN. Won't be back until Sunday. All those days with my family. Please reassure me that we won't murder each other.

Signed a contract for the school year. I know nothing about my kid except her first name. Nothing. I really wish I'd gotten a job in the district. I don't understand why Bosslady never called me back. That's so unbelievably rude.

Saturday night, we'll be at the WI Dells at a neat resort. (We're talking fireplace in the room neat resort. Seriously.) I'm thinking I want to get my hair braided - they have a few stands in there that do it. But....job starting Monday. Should I or shouldn't I?

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, good night!

August 01, 2004

trip through my mind

Bored bored bored. I am very bored.

I'm waiting for the Discovery Channel's new special on Christopher Columbus and his exhumed body. It looks utterly fascinating.

I wonder what tonight's TCM silent movie is. HEY! There isn't one! What's the deal with that? Ugh. I know it's the month of stars, but I thought they'd still keep the silents on. : ( None this month, though.

We're going to Six Flags Great America next week. (For JC and Gillian's birthdays ;)) I'm looking now to see if they still have Twickets. I'm not seeing any, rats. (Where you get a discounted price on second day tickets.) It only comes up for Magic Mountain. But, if you buy online and print at home, you get $7 off. That's a great deal, what with no lines to get in, then.

Mom found an SLP program online. I'll look into it, but I already feel like I put that chapter of my life behind me.

Did I ever mention that I'm giving a presentation at one of the leading AAC "what an odd extension on their url">national conferences? They accepted me a few weeks ago; it's in Minneapolis in October. Go, me.

Harold the fly keeps dive bombing my face. Please stop it, Harold.

Where, oh where, has my Weather Pixie gone?

Went to Border's today. Bought a book called Tinder Box, on the 1903 Chicago Iroquois Theater Disaster, and Family Trust, by the author of Legally Blonde. I think both look like a great deal of fun.

Suppose I should go look at the NOVA program now. And, perhaps, play Sims.

July 01, 2004

sports night la la la la

Things have been freaking CRAZY around here lately.

1. We got new carpeting in the ENTIRE house.

2. I had to fully clear out my bedroom. (traumatic experience)

3. So I don't need to do so again in a few weeks when we paint the house, my room is currently empty until it gets painted first.

4. I moved into the guest room/office downstairs.

5. Great for privacy, less fun for running up and down stairs to have conversations. I'd rather be upstairs in my room.

6. My computer monitor is set up on the nightstand, CPU on the floor, keyboard on my lap.

7. I've fallen in love with Sports Night again. I discovered it three years ago, when I was also discovering nsync/popslash, and chose popslash as my primary fandom. Now I got Jennie into SN, which landed me firmly in the midst of it as well.

I've been watching episodes, daydreaming, reading fic, and inserted them into my Sims game. Oh, yes, this is love.

Danny's my #1 love. That's the Josh Charles that's been in my sidebar for the last three years. <.g> Casey is great, but I just want to hug Danny and never let go. LOL

8. We have digital cable, after nearly two weeks of the service not servicing. Yay for TCM! Yay for Bravo! Plus I've been watching Alton Brown daily. Yay for Alton Brown!

June 12, 2004


Things have been pretty quiet lately. Trying to get into a routine a work with my new kid. He's a doll, but a challenge. Not what I've been used to this year. But I do enjoy him a great deal.

Spent seven (7) hours at the mall on Thursday. ::boggles:: And only spent $200, including lunch and dinner. LOL Seriously, though, bought some excellently cute things. Sparkly Superman tee, new denim shorts, new jeans, fantastic wonderful perfect pink skirt, and the adorable denim crop pants with embroidered butterflies and appliqued flowers I am currently wearing, among other things. Best of all? I finally built a Justin! After over a year, I have a complete *NSYNC stuffed collection. I am both amused and scared. But really, they're totally cute. And as I was leaving, the store lady suggested that I come back and build Justin a girl. I agreed, sure, nice idea. Then she added, "Perhaps the Cameron Diaz type?" I cracked up. Too funny! Except now I want a Britney bear. Ooops.

Josh's last soccer of the season was today. It's like a reunion there! My kid was there, my summer kid was there, another kid in my summer class was there, the kid I worked with at lunch all year was there, etc. So fun. My kid saw me across the entire park, and I could hear her call my name as she ran to me. Eeeee! She's the most adorable thing in the world. Her mom says she's been asking about me. I feel so loved. <.g> They want me to babysit her and hang out with her, but were afraid if we did so, I couldn't be her aide next year. Mom told her we wouldn't tell if they didn't. <.g> So they may be calling soon. That will be nice. I do miss her a lot. I have a picture up on my closet, next to Joey. <.g> It's with the Christmas tree picture she drew me.

Just watched Bridget Jones on TBS. Oh, how I love Colin Firth and Mr. Darcy. He loves her. Just as she is! I'm such a sap. It gets me every time. The best scene is totally in the kitchen, cooking together. It's just wonderful and romantic and funny and sweet, and damn it, I want that. LOL

Also watched Field of Dreams on ABC. This may be one of my top five movies. It gives me great joy. And as much as I love and adore Jimmy Stewart, I cannot picture him as Archie Graham. It was meant to be Burt Lancaster, always and forever.

Also! Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea were on today!!! It was a fantastic movie day for me (I even also saw a play! So I'm totally good). I also decided that it was past time I pledge money to PBS, since I watch it so often and Anne every time it's on. So I did, and my copy of AoA on DVD is winging its way to its new home. Now I'll have both on DVD! I entered to win a trip for two to PEI, but sadly did not win in that drawing. I so wanted to go with Karey in August, but work's going to put the kibosh on that. : ( One of these days, man. I WILL get there.

May 24, 2004


I think I found a way for those damned popup ads to not bother me - Netscape and AOL don't have them! And Netscape automatically imported my IE bookmarks, bless its heart! And poof, no more ads. I'm so happy. Problem isn't solved, of course, since they still exist on my computer, but it's a good fix until summer vacation when I can bring my baby in. {{HUGS Netscape}}

My cousin's wedding is Sunday. I'm a bridesmaid and therefore spending the weekend downtown with the wedding party. Friday is vodka shots followed by another bar for maitais followed by another place for brandy and cigars. It's a combo bachelor/bachelorette party. Um, yeah, kinda not thrilled. PLus, the wedding? Lord. Her mom, my aunt, won't be there. It's an awful mess, and it's not a happy time, and wow, it won't be fun at times. Very tense, I think. <.sigh> So, I put on my happy face because I love her and don't want anything else to mar this for her. (Not that she's entirely right, nor is my aunt entirely wrong. But still.)

I don't see JC on this Faking the Video. ::frowns:: Even the SunTimes told me he was on. Maybe he's the "Him" they're talking about that I didn't notice. <.g> Except I'd think I'd recognize his voice. Oh , well. He'll be there sometime.

May 20, 2004

norton baby

So, installed my new Norton. 38 adware things found. 6 deleted, but the other 32 I should manually do. This terrifies me. <.sigh> I may need to bring it in someplace, to be safe. And one wants me to uninstall kazaa! Dude, I may not use it often (once in the last year), but nearly all my mp3s are in that folder!!!! What do I dooooooooooooooooo?

Saw JC's ADIDAS video. Um, yeah. I love it, I think it's wicked cool, but I can't imagine seeing that on MTV at any time, let alone now. LOL!! But dude, loved it.

adware. help meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

May 15, 2004


Discover your Zodiac Personality
Discover your Zodiac Personality @ Quiz Me

And fittingly enough, that is my zodiac sign. <.g> It's also pretty true.

I am fully exhausted. Don't think I'm getting enough sleep. Ooops. But I had another Sibshop today - it may have been the best one I've done. Some things weren't perfect, but overall I was pleased. The kids were wonderful and had a great time and I loved them all. And there was silly string, and I can't remember the last time I laughed so much as I did during that part.

On the Line will be on ABCFamily! May 25, I think. I'll have to watch. It's been years since I saw it, but dude. Lance. And Joey. On my TV. They're so cute.

I'm trying to make an index page for s-d (FINALLY) and am attempting to make it an image map thingie. So far, less than sucessful. But it's pretty, and eventually I'll make it bow to my will and do what it's supposed to. Perhaps if I looked up the directions instead of winging it. LOL

I have a body pillow! I sleep hugging a pillow, have for years, but never invested in a body pillow. And just as I was going to order a beautiful blue one from a catlogue, made with non-allergenic primaloft, my dad bought me one. LOL It was only $10, so yay! The one I was going to get was closer to $100. <.g> This one is soft and mushy, and I tend to prefer firmer pillows, but hey, it was cheap. <.g> It'll be fun.

I'm working on a Britney/Christina fic for a challenge now. It's hard! I've been writing boy pov for so long now. This is only my second femslash story ever - I tend to prefer men. LOL But I think it has promise. And it's good to get a new POV going. I remember in my writing class, I was the first person to write cross-gender main characters; everyone else stuck with their own gender. Wimps. ;)

May 13, 2004

la la la la

I think I wrote more stories when I posted here. I was so in the habit of recording everything, writing every day, and turning little incidents into stories, and now I'm not.

I was playing in my stats tonight, and saw that 91 people had read my latest trickyfish story since I posted it last night. Wicked cool, man. I don't expect that. But it was 8 people less than how many visited my posts here from April 2002 so far this month. LOL How funny is that?

My kid shaved her eyebrows last night. When you think of a litle kid doing that, you think missing eyebrows. Not so much. She actually had a deft hand and a good line. <.g> Wouldn't have known if her mom hadn't said something, seriously. She still had more eyebrows than the SLP has on a typical day. <.giggle>

I never really got the eyebrow plucking thing. I've never done it. I'm lucky in that I don't need to, I guess. LOL But even if I looked like Bert, I couldn't imagine pulling out individual hairs. Or having thread weaved through them and then being pulled out by some lady's teeth. Haven't we moved past such medieval* tortures?? <.g>

*Did you know that medieval is Latin for Middle Ages? We're doing a middle ages unit at centers, and I thought that was interesting. Also, we call letters UPPER CASE or lower case because of where the letters were in 19th century printing press boxes. Capital letters were used less often and were therefore in the upper case, off the table and out of the way. Cool, huh? So endeth the day's history lesson.

Today, I proudly made AppleWorks calendar template my bitch. It took a few days, and a lot of growls, and some threats to it's computerhood, but I did it. I'm such a top. ;) I was proud of myself.

There are some days I wonder if my mom knows about this site and/or reads it, and other days I don't even want to consider that possibility. <.g> Oh, well. I think she already knows I read nsync slash. Don't know about her, but I vividly recall the day she came in on me reading Rhys's "Two Straight Men in Wisconsin: The Amazing Adventures of Chris's Cock." ("No, mom, it's not pornography! It's FUNNY. It's just a very very funny title for a story about Chris and Lance. Really.") She very kindly hasn't mentioned it since, however. There isn't much on here she doesn't already know, anyway. I think it's just the fannish things she doesn't know. And frankly, she doesn't want to know those things - I know, she's said so. So, I just spent five minutes talking in circles because whether she reads or not, I don't care. Just if you do, mom, no twitting about the pretty boys. ;)

I rather feel like sewing. Only I also rather feel like reading, and I can't do both. Hmm. Decisions, decisions.

March 02, 2004


Um. Is this thing on? I'm not seeing a blog at my blog anymore.

eta: And now I see blog, but no sidebars. Eeeep.

eata: And then I made that edit, and refreshed, and it went away! Does it only work on odd posts? Odd as in first, third, fifth time I post it. <.g>

This is making me sad. I don't even know where to ask to fix it, mt or s-d. I e-mailed Krissy. Lady K, please save me!

February 26, 2004


Dirty Dancing! Dirty Dancing is on USA! I heart this movie a really lot.

Pirate Monkey's Harry Potter Personality Quiz
Harry Potter Personality Quiz
by Pirate Monkeys Inc.

Nifty. <.g> Somewhere along the way, my M-B results changed and I do get this result consistantly now. Interesting.

Did I ever mention Joshy has to go downtown for some big med tests tomorrow? He does. I'm taking the morning off work and everything. We're all pretty worried. Endocrinological workup.

I've been listening to JC all the time I can. In headphones at work on lunch, in headphones while Joshy bowled. (Hit a 96 today!! Better than me, yo.) I like it muchly. Except Mercy. But even that's not so bad, I guess.

Oooh, lifts in the water. Love this. The sequel/prequel whatever looks pretty crappy, but I think I saw Jonathan Jackson's name in the credits. So, might have to rent it eventually.

Tiffay Rawlins' Come to Me video concept is a piece of brilliance and I hope JC stumbles on it and makes it. Because, yes. It's perfect for the song and him.

Oh, and he doesn't want another Clay album? LOL! He's so cute. I love Clay's voice, but I agree, I don't really need another Clay album either. Not if it's like his first.

January 29, 2004

baby, it's cold out there

The temperature is a whopping 2 degrees right now. It's gonna drop down to about -10 tonight, and rise to a high of 5 tomorrow. Yay for winter! LOL

I've gotten about 300 of thse mydoom e-mail viruses. I use Outlook Express - I deleted all the e-mails I got that have attachments once they landed in my inbox. as long as I don't open the attachment, I'm good, right? Having it download from my server into my inbox hasn't given me 300 copies of the virus, has it? I used to know/be sure of what I was talking about; tonight, I have to ask.

I LOVE TiVo. I've watched GH every day since I got it set up, since I don't have to worry about rewinding and retaping. GH sucks horrifically, but I am still 100% in love with Georgie and Dillon and will be forever and ever ever. ::nods emphatically::

January 05, 2004

snow snow snow snow snow!

Did ya see my weather pixie yesterday?? It snowed! 6 inches. Whoo! Was less whoooo-ish when I was cleaning off my car at 7:45 this morning, or driving in snow for the first time, but snow! I took pretty pictures, will upload soon.

Started pilates today. Eeep! Fun, but scary. Mostly scary. Hopefully at the end, in six months, it will be more fun than scary. LOL Must learn how to breathe, yo. Still dizzy.

I'm getting WENN on DVD! And Biz and I are going to have a marathon over the phone and watch them together. I am SO excited.

Meanwhile, it's 12 out, and it had ben 60 a few days ago. Gotta love Chicago.

December 27, 2003


Aw, man, I wanted to post on Christmas, wish everyone a happy day! But I was (am) sick, so I was asleep by 8. So, instead, you get it today. Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas! <.g> (Or, really, it should be Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays. Or else the rhythm is totally off in my brain. LOL)

Hope everyone had a great day! I did, illness and all. I got totally fun things, gave totally fun things, and relaxed the whole day.

I'm most excited about the (real!) pearl necklace I got, a gorgeous snowglobe with tulips growing out of snow that says "The Future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams" (Eleanor Roosevelt, my hero), TiVo, WW S1, and Sims Superstar. And the REM greatest hits CD, which is *awesome.

My mom loves her waterpick and scrapbooking daily calendar- you cut off the date, and can use the paper as a base. It's so neat! I also got her a CD she'll love. If I ever FIND it. <.grumble> Dad got Andy Griffith stuff, and Married With CHildren and The Man Show on DVD, and things for his Jeep. <.g> Josh got DVDs and computer games, and we haven't really seen him since.

And, yes, it was quiet and pleasant. Two years in a row. WHOOOOO! Too cool for words.

Mom and I watched Bed of Roses today. I think I need that movie. It's so damned sweet. And I love the music. I'm on a search to download Scarlet's Independent Love Song. Anyone have it? Lady K? I remember you put it on a mix tape for me in HS, but I don't know if you still have it. LOL

I've been staying up until all hours the last two days (well, midnight. It FEELS later) reading Sesas, Don We Now Our Gay Apparel. 160 lovely popslashy stories. Well, all 160 aren't lovely, unfortunately. Some suck the big one. But others are just fantasticly wonderful, and I am enjoying myself greatly. Only 127 left! LOL

Only sad thing is that I'm not in Texas, like I was supposed to be. It sucks, but the decision was made, and I'm comfortable with it. I don't necessarily like it, but I think it was the right one. Texas will be had, though. <.g> Jennie's not getting rid of me that easily!

Back to Trickyfish.

December 23, 2003


Okay, I started to type in the addy to post here, and actually started to type in "" ::thud:: JC has stationed himself in my brain. And I don't even LIKE the song. LOL

For once, I have a legit reason for not posting - strep throat. GAH. Pure hell. But I finally finished my meds today. Wheeee!!!! So it's been almost two weeks since I got sick. Sunday was the first day I felt really human again. Although, oddly, I woke up with no voice today, and it's been in and out all day. I waver between squeaks and throaty. Mom's furious at the thought I might get strep again, I'm just annoyed that talking isn't always an option.

It's Christmas Eve-Eve! I wrapped daddy and Josh's gifts tonight, and will do mom's tomorrow. Also will decorate the tree tomorrow. And, yeah, pick up a few last minute stocking gifts. Nothing like the last minute, yo! <.g>

When I was sick, I watched a lot of TV. Queer Eye for the Straight Guy has sucked me in entirely. I adore Kyan and Ted. Jai's super cute, and I love that he was in Rent with Joey, but Kyan has my heart. <.g>

It's vacation time. Two weeks of freedom. That is going to be two weeks of grad school crap. Whoo-hoo. I was supposed to go to Texas, but that isn't going to happen. ::stares sadly at plane tickets:: I'm gonna get there eventually, as evidenced by the fact that I spent $350 on tickets, but I'm sad that it isn't going to be Saturday. I'm hoping spring, or June at the latest.

I totally did NOT write A Christmas Carol for my Sesa story. I tried, man, I tried. But finally, fourth plot was the winner, and I wrote half of it the night it was due. I actually like it, though, so there's that. It's kinda sweet. I love JC/Chris.

I wanna get back in the habit of posting here again. Maybe I'll force myself to write something every day, even if it's just a line or two.

October 22, 2003

it's october, not december. it's october, not december.

I turned on VH1 yesterday before work, and there was a depressing song playing. I listened for a few seconds and thought to myself, "Wow, this sounds like Sarah McLachlan." Then I watched for a few seconds and thought to myself, "Wow, she even looks like Sarah McLachlan." Turns out, of course, it *was Sarah McLachlan. LOL I had no idea she had a new album! No one does depressing like Sarah. <.g> Always makes me laugh, because I remember reading an interview where she says she's actually a very happy person. She writes these to get it all out so she *stays a happy person. Pretty neat.

I watched While You Were Sleeping last night. I just adore that movie SO MUCH. It's lovely. Made me want winter, too. LOL It's terrible. I saw a Christmas commercial the other day. And a friend in New Brunswick, Canada told me it's been snowing there. And next week, I sign up for a Christmas story exchange. And I have nsync Christmas in my CD player. And...and...and...I really should keep up with Halloween before I move on to Christmas. LOL I'm just so easily susceptible to winter and Christmas mush. LOL!

One thing that will put me in the Halloween spirit - Kate and I are going to an oldfashioned Halloween party this weekend. It's at a living museum village, with lots of volunteers dressed from the 19th century and gypsies and ghost stories around a campfire and stuff. Should be a blast!!

October 11, 2003


Man, it was SO COOL watching last night's Cubs game! That last out was so cool. And the triple! And homerun! I love my boys.

All season long I've bemoaned the fact I've never seen a grand slam. Once, we were at a ball game, and they hit one when I was getting a hot dog with my dad. Story of my life. Tonight, dad and I were cleaning my VCR, RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE TV, and all of a sudden the Cubs were up 4-0. The grand slam was on in front of our eyes and we missed it. LOL

But, my VCR is cleaned, and that's important. Justin's hosting/performing on SNL tonight, which should be amusing, and JC's performing TWO of his singles on MTV on MOnday. I cannot wait, yo.

I also sent in a picture for the Boobie-thon. I really like how the pic came out, actually. Pretty fun. I'm also going to check out the echeck option for donating, or else I'll just mail in my own donation to the Foundation. It's such a great cause, and I'm glad I particpated this year. After all, two of my mom's friends have breast cancer, and mom had her big scare, so I, of course, personally think the more donations the better.

Go Cubbies!!

September 27, 2003


Well, school district says I can't multi-task, so I didn't get to sub. : ( I was pretty disappointed. But really, when there's a sub I'm usually the one who knows what's going on, anyway, it's just a technicality. <.g>

More importantly? Cubs win!! Cubs win!!!!!!!

My Cubbie Bears!!! Clinched the division title for the first time since 1989!!! Mom had headphones all day while we were at swim and soccer, listening to the game. Then we were home for the end, and WOW! It was so exciting!!!!!!!!

Of course, now we're playing the Braves. And I adore the Braves. Also, fantastic team. I want the Cubbies to go all the way, but I'll be pretty okay if the Braves win. But I am rooting for my boys still. Because, yay!!!!!!!!!

Cute dad from that Mary Kate and AShley show Two of a Kind is playing the father of a twenty something on a new ABC show. Dude, there is no way he's old enough to have a kid that old. He's totally adorable with the guy who plays his partner on the show, though. I'll watch just about anything for him.

WW premiere fucking rocked. I adored Amber Tamblyn's new show, Joan of Arcadia. I think those are going to be my must see shows. Las Vegas was glitzy and fun and I adore Josh Duhamel, but it didn't grab me like Joan did.

Watching Remember the Titans now - fantastic movie. I'm greatly enjoying it.

Due to weird and bad scheduling, I get no lunch on Thursday/Friday, and all five days I do 2:1 work with kids who need 1:1. It's generally not extremely pleasant, honestly. But if I don't take the second kid, the kid is alone and that is very very bad. But my teacher and a few other staff members complained on my behalf, and I got a lunch Friday. Whee! Of course, that was the least of my issues - I don't mind grabbing my sandwich while the kids eat. I just want someone else with the second kid so MY kid gets the attention she deserves and needs. We're still working on that one.

Back to my movie.

But, once again: CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!!!!!!!!! Yeah, BABY!!!

September 07, 2003


Wow! Only an hour, and it's done! I'm so excited, because not only does it look super pretty and how I wanted it, but I learned a lot! I fixed the scrollybars and the dashed lines that have been crimson since Krissy made it, and figured out how to move the three parts of the page up so there wasnt a gap, and lots of other little stuff! It feels so good to accomplish something online again.

If you can't tell, it's supposed to be a quilt design for the banner. LOL Just use your imaginations, okay, it was the best I could do. <.g> I like it. The colors come from two photos I'll try and remember to upload later. The blue and green come from a pic I took during a thunderstorm this summer - the blue from the sky and the green from a tree across the street. I loved how the colors looked next to each other, so I ran for my digital camera. The purple and pink come from a sunset pic that Lady K made a few years back that I've always loved.

I should go to bed, since I have an 8am meeting, but I'm still psyched over my triumph over MT's codes. LOL The soft colors are such a relief after all the blue of Lance.

new look

I am determined to make a headstart in changing the look of BR tonight. Who knows how much I'll get done, so it may be in disarry for a day or so. <.g> I'm gonna miss Lance! He's so pretty. But hey, he's on my desktop and calendar, so I don't want to get sick of him or anything. <.g> The new look didn't come out quite as planned, but hey, it's not bad.

Things proceed apace. My kid's mom doesn't seem to believe how well the school year is going - not sure if she just doesn't like/trust me, or if it's just too good of news to wrap her mind around. Could be both. But I like the munchkin. quite a bit.

I'm sure I had other things to say. Can I remember them? Nope. Rats. Oh, well, wish me luck with the design!

August 31, 2003

where oh where has summer gone?

Last week, it was well into the 90s, heat indices over 100. We all melted in school. It was horrible.

Today, we didn't even hit *70*.

It seems summer didn't care to wait for Labor Day; it was done yesterday. Summer is dead, long live summer.

For now, anyway. Lord knows it can jump another 20 degress next week.

Labor Day weekend has certainly involved a lot of laboring. We followed the weather's lead and changed the house's decor to autumn. Whoo. It looks really nice, though.

Played Sims again tonight. Joey and Rina had a baby boy, Brian. Lance and Britney are 100% in love, but she refuses to propose. Which is an annoyance, as Brian is a baby for one more day, and I'd like Lance to be moved out so Bri can have his bedroom. <.giggle> But actually, Lance seems to like Brian, and has taken care of him a few times. Plus, Scott (Joey and Lance's kid) and Joey actually try to play with the baby without the baby crying. Never saw such a thing before. LOL

Waiting to hear news on my grandfather. He lives down in Georgia, and mom usually calls him every Sunday or so. Today, she couldn't get through - busy signal. And then tonight, her brother (also lives in GA) called to say he hasn't been able to contact him in days. So I guess he was driving over there, but it's been almost 2 hours, and we haven't heard a thing. I'm worried. : (

I need a happy book. A happy, fall and/or winter novel. Or story. Maybe I'll visit Don We Now Our Gay Apparel. I need the happy.

August 16, 2003

why not?

Lordy. I've been meaning all summer to clean out my room, since I'm here all year for the first time since we moved to this house. Today: the closet. LOL

Man, the things I found!! Like the first 421 chapters of Steal Your Heart, by BallerinaJ. What's scary is that I started skimming, and then READING. Parts of it were so good and cute and funny and I adored it! And then other parts of it sucked. Really badly. But I actually kept a few of the parts that I loved this time around. LOL

I also found a few binders of Silk Stalkings stories. Dude, I didn't even remember that I'd read any or printed them out!! I was astounded by how badly written the majority of them were. Yeesh. When I see stories like those in my fandoms now, I skip them. : ( But some were good, and so I still have a binder of Silk fic on my bed ready to be reread. <.giggle>

Then I found tons of stuff (jewelry, ceafts, pins, stickers, folders, etc) from junior high, and even when we lived in Chicago. LOL Oh, and a Spice Girls CD. Then, of course, there were the pots and pans crammed in there. Just don't ask.

But it's mostly clean now. Just have to go through all my clothes and weed out the ones I don't wear anymore. Hopefully, this will be done without bloodshed on either my part or my mother's. LOL

I watched Pride and Prejudice on A&E the last few nights. God, I adore that movie. It was the Colin Firth version - I've still not seen all of it, including, sadly, the wet shirt scene, but I live in hope. LOL My copy of the book is totally falling apart, so I think I'll grab another one at Border's tomorrow. Yay Borders!

What always strikes me about the movie P&P is how very much Lizzy looks like Kristine. Same smiley eyes and round face and curly dark brown hair. <.g> Quite a lot of fun. Have you seen it, Lady K? You'd love it, it's so romantic.

Also, pretend today is August 13: Hope you had a lovely, lovely anniversary with Eric. I was going to post a pic of you and froggie here and everything! You pop up a lot from the wedding weekend on my screensaver. <.g> I also can't believe it's been three years since I last saw you! I wish we lived closer so I could visit you again. We could crash on the couch and watch soaps together. And, did I tell you, I'm really good at making your stuffed shells now. LOL It's one of mom and mine favorite recipes from TRK, and we make it pretty often. <.giggle> So, see, I could make dinner and everything! If only, you know, I didn't have this pesky job. ; ) So, in the meantime, if you didn't see my e-mail, um, can I have your address? LOL

We watched Lizzie McGuire movie tonight. SO CUTE! I do so love it. Because I am a dork. This was our third time, and Josh knows it so well, he'd tell us what scene it was before it happened. (FIREWORKS!) <.giggle>

I'm gonna go sing What Dreams Are Made Of for the rest of the night now.

August 10, 2003


Whoo! MT is back! I tried posting last week, and it was down. And now, yay, it's back!

Of course, too tired to post anything of real substance. LOL

I'm so lazy about downloading e-mail these days. I had over 200 on r@s-d, and almost literally every other one contained a virus. Then it kept redownloading mail from two weeks ago. I'm about ready to toss that addy to the wolves, man.

I've finally begun a new layout for here! I have utterly no idea how it will turn out, but it'll be something new. LOL

Coming soon - waxing poetic on Sims Unleashed (I married Joey! Who was already married to Lance!), detailed lusting over Justin Timberlake and that hot guy who stripped during one of Christina's songs, and more. Just, like, kick me to post. But don't use my addy. ::nods::

July 19, 2003


I've been so quiet lately! Not much is going on.

My next door neighbors go to the school I'll be working at next year. I haven't even gotten official paperwork yet, but they brought over a staff sheet that got mailed to them for today - and I'm on it! I'm a dork, but that was actually pretty exciting for me. LOL

I had lunch with my Ruth this week, too! She was Josh's kdg teacher, and then I worked in her room senior year in HS and never went back. <.g> Turns out she's long time friends with the teacher I'll work with, which just amuses me. LOL Not such a surprise I like my teacher, then. <.g> But we talked and gossiped and had a grand time, and I drove there all by myself. Heeee!

Justin concert on Tuesday! I'm excited. Friends are coming in from all over (okay, really, one friend and a bunch of other internet people I've heard of. <.g> I've been driving mom nuts, because I know *of these people, and heard their names so often I recognize them, but really? Don't know them from Adam and generally forget who they are when mom asks. It's pretty frustrating for both of us, right mom? <.g> I feel bad, though.) But Kare's coming! ANd Kare's neat.

JT's doing an aftershow at HOB at midnight on Tuesday. 1300 people only. Kare asked me to get her tickets when I got mine, and, well. Didn't get any. I was so disappointed, because it seems like a fantastic thing. 45 minute set, 21+, no tricks, just him and his guitar singing fronting an R&B band. <.sigh> But I was so upset, mom asked our friend who was visiting if she knew anyone at HOB, just joking. And, uh, she did. So we might have gotten tickets after all. Which means that we'd likely have to leave Justin's real concert early, and that sucks, but HOB! Even if we don't get them, I can't get over how totally awesome Jill was for trying. I have some pretty awesome friends. : ) Kare was so cool about it, told me that I should absolutely not feel bad, that one concert and meeting me was enough. And then Jill calling her dad for me, and, yes. I'm definitely blessed.

This is a long entry for nothing going on. LOL

Oh, saw Spiderman tonight. I really enjoyed it. And Kirsten Dunst didn't annoy much as much as usual! Still a lot, but definitely reduced. Tobey's such a cutie. I actually want to see the second one now.

I still have to enter passwords every time I sign online, for OE. And I can't find the main account password. Both of these things are pissing me off!

My usual chatty friends are either at work or in Miami partying with nsync (I am SO saving money from each paycheck this year so I can hit 2004's), so I shall say goodnight to Biz and head to bed, I do believe. <.g>

July 04, 2003

oops (i did it again)

I suck at updating during the summer. This does not bode well for the next year.

I'm feeling...itch tonight. (To steal a notion from Connie Willis.) Penned in. I could totally go for a road trip. Or a weekend visit with a friend. I love my family, I do, even when there's so much negative energy you could choke on it, they're my *family and I'm glad to be home. But. I could use some regrouping time. I could also use some writnig time, but when I have time alone at night, I try to catch up online with my friends instead. So, yeah. Falling behind with things I enjoy.

But not all is negative and bad. Well, I didn't get into a grad school. But hey, a teacher I work with is *very excited, because she really wants me to work in her classroom this year. So, we'll see.

What else? Not much. If I clean my room, get everything integrated from my apartment, I'm getting two hamsters. I'm excited about that. I have a cool and comfy bed waiting for me. That's good. I accidentally shut off my computer with my toe a few minutes ago, thereby getting me out of a conversation with a guy I'm not exactly crazy about who asked me out. That's very good. I always wanted my first date to be with a guy who I actually really liked, so I'm actually disappointed. I'm a dork. But we'll see if we can count going to a bar with Liss and her friend to be a date, and see where it goes/try to end it from there. I just have nothing to say to him, ever, and our IMs are like pulling teeth, and that's no fun for me. But, 22, never been on a date, can't be too picky I guess. Might as well jump in for some experience.

Also, note to self, call Jon to bring Austin over. ::nods:: That would be fun.

Okay. Maybe if I head out now, I can write for 20 minutes or so. I reread some of my stories last night, the unfinished ones, and god, how I want to finish them. I have good plans now for the Lance/Justin story, the no space one. I know what happened in London now! That was what was plugging up my process last WINTER when I was writing it. So, YAY! I think I shall go do that now. ::bounce::

June 25, 2003

stuff and nonsense

Yesterday I had a bit of an "accidentlet." Nothing big, but I scraped another car, and totally freaked out. But the guy called back today, said everything was fine, not to worry, and it was really okay. So I'm breathing again.

I built another bear! Chris. Chris is white with purple tipped fur. I was trying so hard to find something to dress him in that didn't clash with the purple. LOL! It was pretty hard. I had a pair of tan cargo shorts, and the lady at Build a Bear suggested the "princess" t-shirt. I looked at her, mildly surprised and announced, "It's a BOY bear." We all started cracking up. <.g> (Relatedly, I'm considering it for JC, since the purple sparkly outfit I originally had had in mind seems to be retired.) Then she pointed out the white polo shirt, and it was perfect. I took pics of him, and him with Penguin!Lance and ComfyBear!Joey that I will share as soon as I get my digital blog set up. Or as soon as I plug in my USB cable, whichever is sooner. <.g> Next up, JC. I already found an adorable bucket hat for him. I think he'll be a white bear with a blue nose. Then Justin will be the curly haired bear, and I will have my little stuffed nsync group complete.

I am insane.

Meanwhile, Zippity Zoo Day is this Friday. It's a day at the zoo for people who use augmentative and alternative communication and their families. My mom started it with a speech path and a rep from an AAC company. Due to a few unexpected occurences, I have been promoted from running the sibling activities, to running the entire thing. Um. Wheee? LOL Should be fun.

Joey from nsync is engaged! I'm such a sap, I love all weddings and engagements. <.g> I'm so excited for him. It's Kelly, the mother of his two year old, Briahna. They've been together for more than ten years, since HS, so I think that's pretty neat. I like people to be happy, even if it's people I've only seen and not met. LOL

Um, what else. Not sure. Really tired. Long day. Must clean off remnants of mine and Josh's video party this afternoon before I go to bed. (I have a dozen or two videos strewn on my bed. Thanks, Josh.)

Sweet dreams, y'all.

June 24, 2003


I got OE moved over! My new computer feels officially like my own now.

Slowly, I am starting to enjoy my job.

I have a job interview in an hour and a half, for a receptionist position. Please, please send happy thoughts. It's an evening gig, three nights a week and Saturday morning. I could totally do it.

I'm going to build a new bear today. Likely, it will be Chris.

I look cute today, in a white wrap blouse. I love this blouse.

You are now caught up with Rina's life.

June 05, 2003


It's so hard to update during the summer, man. No time to log on! So annoying.

Still jobless. Kinda. I interviewed last week for my dream job, she kept referring to it as mine, and then I didn't get it. She raved about me in the message she left, but she "actually" found someone more qualified. Whoo.

But then today I got offered a part time job as an aide in summer school. It's so NOT the job I wanted, but she was kind enough to tell me to come fill out the paperwork even though it starts Monday and she already hired someone. She'll still fit me in, which is very nice of her. But. Part time, four mornings a week, probably a pay cut, and not at all the job I want. Life kinda sucks right now, gotta say. So now I need to find *another job for afternoons. I'm thinking movie extra is the way to go here.

Watched the MTV movie awards. Justin was cute. Felt bad for Seann. Adored Aly Hannigan, natch. Sqeaked at the small glance of Alexis with her. Thought Joey looked cute, no matter what the fashion people said. They all looked stupid too. <.snicker>

Got a copy of Joey in RENT this week. Absolutely fabulous. Love him.

I finally, after about 18 months, took my Lance bobblehead out of its box. (The thing fucking scared me, okay? Ew.) But my mom and I agree that he's *far less demonic outside the box. It's a definite improvement, so go Lance!

Uh, what else? Should be ready to work completely on my new computer this weekend. I found my outlook files, and will attempt to import them tomorrow night. Wish me luck.

Can't think of anything else to babble about. I miss being online. I miss my friends. I need to write stories again - have a challenge due in August, and a crossover idea that I'm totally in love with. Much transfer love and such into actual *words. Good luck to me and the Boston Red Sox, huh?

May 26, 2003


Well, my old computer transferred everything to my new one.

99.5%, anyway.

Jennie and I went through and specifically told it what programs to move. We omitted ones that I hadn't used in years, ones that were HP specific, etc. It moved everything anyway.

UGH. Now I *still have the programs I don't want, and keep getting a few errors every time I boot it up, saying that some programs doesn't work with XP.

To make matters worse, for the first few folders I opened, it told me that the files were hidden and not to delete anything so I didn't wreck my system. And it was things like my AOL folder, and my program files folder, which were both full of things I want to delete now, like hotbar and ICQ and stuff. <.sigh> I freaked.

I ended up deleting those anyway, and I'll do a system maintenence right away. : ( My new *baby! So sad.

Oh, the .5% that didn't move? My OE E-mail. GRRRR! LOL The address book moved! LOL So I guess I'll try to just send over the e-mail this time. Should work.

Now, the most important test - I am off to play Sims there for the first time. ; )

May 25, 2003

Catching up!

Finally, I get to post! My internet ended the day before I graduated, so I was internetless a few days. Then it took a week to get my computer set up, and then Jennie was here, and now here I am. LOL

So, I graduated. <.g> That was fun. Unreal, really. 66% of my major had high honors. They were also all sorority chicas. Perhaps we should have paid more attention to the cheating allegations against our class. But it was still fun. I heard Mom and Josh calling my name and cheering as I walked across the stage (it was a loud ceremony - everyone got screams and stuff. <.g>). That was really cool.

Oh, fun note - Saturday night, I had so much trouble breathing. By Sunday night, I was covered in hives. Why, yes. Yes, I was allergic to my graduation gown. I'm still covered in hives, even after a week of Zyrtec.

So, moved out. Tres fun. Cleaned my room a lot, for Jennie. Thursday, drove to Chicago with my grandfather and picked her up from Midway. There was much driving in circles around...55th? and Kilpatrick. But I did it! No one ended up mad, dead, or unhappy. <.g>

It was SO COOL having Jennie here. We had a blast. We set up my new computer, we went to the zoo to check out some ZZD stuff, and just hung out. Next time, though, it's my turn to fly to Houston. <.g>

Grad party was last night. It was at a cool restaurant in Greektown, and we had so much fun. Pictures? No, didn't happen. LOL But all my friends were there - Erin and Carol, Jon and Dave, their families, everyone. I gave my dad this certification of appreciation early on in the night (then diving back to my table, whimpering, "Drink. Where's my rum? Gimme!" <.snicker>). Then at the end I gave my mom the tassel that I wore across the stage. I was kinda leading up to it, you know, "I gave that to my dad, but he wasn't the only one who supported me, blah blah," and Jon and Dave's dad Brian raised his hands and shouted out, "It was me!" LOL! So I was like, "Yes! I couldn't have done it without Brian!" <.g> My poor great-grandmother was actually distressed, "No! Your mother! Your mother!" <.giggle> So anyway, that was cool.

It was pretty amusing, too - I was sitting at one table with Jennie, Erin and Carol, and mom and Josh were at another, and my dad was at a third with his family and friends. LOL Nice family showing, huh? But it worked nicely for us. Josh hung out with his DVD player, mom chatted with her friends and made plans, and dad hung out with his friends. So we all had a LOT of fun.

Then (yeesh, getting detailed here. LOL! I just don't want to forget, I guess), Jennie, Erin, Lissa, Damien and I checked into our room at the Drake (D didn't stay...), got gussied up, and headed out to a jazz bar, Underground Wonder Bar, Liss heard about. It was *fantastic. Great place. Also, everyone should head over to Jen Porter's website and check out her stuff. We loved her.

Also loved were the many amaretto stone sours I drank throughout the night. LOL! Big fan.

We stuck around there until about 2, before heading back to the hotel room. Pictures of us and the room are forthcoming. We were all pretty giggly and stuff. But we wobbled our way down the street just fine. <.giggle>

So Jennie left this morning, and Erin and I came back here. And that's been my last week. <.g> Had SO much fun, and I wouldn't change a thing! Well, except for not telling Jon and Dave we were going out until the party - Jon had plans, and Dave wanted to come out, but didn't get a chance. Would have been fun with them around, but the five of us still had a great time. <.g>

May 14, 2003


Dude. Tornado warning. I'm being told to take cover. It's sunny out. ::blinks::

but it won't be for long. Damn, man. I was so close to being out of here. LOL Just what I need - another excuse to not being paying enough attention to my Poli Sci. LOL Good thing it's not due until tomorrow *night.

If this storm makes me miss West Wing, American Idol, Dawson's Creek, the Buffy Biography AND Justin's Turnstyle, I will not be a happy person. it's bad enough I'm trying to watch all of the above when they all air overlapped, but to not have a chance? Hysterics.

Which is my fangirl way of saying I'm very freaked out, hate storms, and find comfort in meaningless babble about fluffy things.

May 08, 2003


Tornado watches SUCK. They suck great big hairy donkey balls.

But, on the plus side, I'm going home tonight! Thunderstorms, tornadoes and all. <.g> Yay for Lizzie McGuire tomorrow! And hopefully cute and single med students going with.

Burn it! CDs have been completed and should be mailed tomorrow. Go me! I'm listening to mine now. I put the wrong version of the first song on mine (there's three, damn him, and only the first one is good LOL), but everyone else got the right one. Hopefully they'll be well received. We all know how my tastes run. LOL

Poor mom. "I TOLD you to come home yesterday!" <.g> It'll all be fine, though. Home I shall be, until Sunday afternoon. When, yay, get to spend part of my birthday stuck here alone. But not all of it, which is good. <.g>

May 06, 2003

back up?

Quick questions - is there a way to save my Outlook mail to disk so I can transfer it to my new computer? Ditto all of my favorite places on IE. On AOL, no prob, but is there an easy way for IE?

Also, can I just move, for example, the entire Sims folder onto a CD, and everything therein will be saved, and able to paste it or something onto the new computer? I'm trying to get everything straight before I start moving it all, so I don't mess up. LOL

May 05, 2003


This entry may cut off abruptly, as I'm waiting for my dance partner to show up. LOL

I'm so excited - today, I answered a question right in my Arch class, and I have 5 points of extra credit towards the final! Plus I get ten extra points for my paper. And I've gotten a number more from random attendance checks. So cool. <.g>

I think I have the track listing for the Burn It spring edition done. Now to make the CDs and make them pretty. <.g> I'm kinda excited about it. I got two of my groupmate's already, at home, and they sound so cool! Can't wait to be able to listen to them. But they're very different, I think, from mine. LOL Big surprise there, huh?

I'm reading Christmas romance novels in May. But they're SO FUN! Guys with kids! And snow! Whats not to love?

She's here!

May 03, 2003

land of the living

Finally, feeling alive again! I think it was the combination of allergies and dancing for four hours today, but I had a killer headache. So I took some Tylenol, crashed on the couch, and can move again. Breathing is less good, but hey! Baby steps. <.g>

The dance routine is fun. We took and modified some nsync moves, and it's been working out well. Only seven more 8 counts to go. I think I'm going to watch the other nsync DVD and grab some moves from that concert. <.giggle>

I have Gladiator on. I can't believe I've never actually watched this before. Joaquin Phoenix is just the cutest thing *ever. Yum.

Okay, now I'm actually bored. Hmmm. What to do, what to do. Ideas welcome. <.g>

May 02, 2003


This is the coolest thing, man. It's a glove that translates what you sign! Still a lot of kinks, of course, just getting started, but WOW, what a breakthrough!! It's amazing.

May 01, 2003

Knowledge is power

Things I learned this week:

1. Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Once More with Feeling soundtrack is the reason why people won't watch political coverage in depth.

2. It is indeed possible to take your shirt off and put another on while not putting down the phone from your ear.

3. I will end up in the 3rd level of hell, gluttony. I really thought I'd end up in Level 2, Lust. Go figure.

4. I am a musical thinker, like Mozart, John Lennon, and Jimi Hendrix.*

5. American Idol fans are idiots, OR the producers are sadists. I'm willing to believe some of both.

6. Emily Byrd Starr/Ilse Burnley slash exists.

7. There is a point of boredom where not only will you *read Lizzie McGuire fanfic, you will strongly desire to write it.

8. Lance Bass is an adorable dork who can say his lines well 83.33% of the time. (Witness Hollywood Squares this week. I certainly have.)

If knowledge is power, I wonder why I'm not feeling very powerful with my new knowledge. <.g>

*This is bizarre, because while I do listen to music a lot, love playing some songs on the piano, and will often sing randomly, I suck at writing music, playing spontaneously or choreographing to music. Witness my plans to watch nsync DVDs and crib moves for my routine Tuesday. But when they put it like this: "Tend to think in sounds, and may also think in rhythms and melodies; are sensitive to the sounds and rhythms of words as well as their meanings; feel a strong connection between music and emotions," well, that makes sense for me, and as a writer. But I still think it should have been linguistic thinker.

April 23, 2003

Life in 1905

This is neat, man! You plug in your father's occupation, and find out what would likely happen with you.

You are a Box maker!
- A Snapshot of your life as it might have been in 1905

You go to elementary school until you're 11 years old. You particularly enjoy learning cookery and needlework, although you find laundry work tedious as you do too much of it at home. Your parents don't want you to stay there as they need your help at home.

Career Prospects
At 15 you start work as a box maker, a job that you have seen advertised on the hoardings near your home. Hours are long, the work repetitive and you hate your boss – he never seems to reward your hard work. You need to stay in this job though to bring in enough money to bring up your children. You and your husband find it hard to make ends meet from both of your salaries.

Leisure Time
You save up and buy a bicycle and in fine weather you go on trips to the park on Sundays. You love a good sing-a-long at the music hall.

Living Conditions
When you start work you live on the premises in a crowded dormitory. When you marry you escape from the dormitory and move to your husband's lodgings – a room in a terraced house. You find it cheaper to do most of the shopping at the back door – fruit, vegetables and fish from carts but occasionally you splash out on luxuries from the grocer's shop. As a treat you sometimes buy fish and chips from the parade of shops near your home.

Marital Relations
You meet your husband at work and marry at 17. You have four children.

World War One
Your husband is reluctant to leave you to go to war, but in 1916 he is obliged to as it's illegal not to sign up. Your husband dies in the trenches as a private soldier in 1917 at the Battle of Passchendaele.

Interestingly, this is what I get if I go up socially.

Continue reading "Life in 1905" »

April 12, 2003


Okay, probably time to step *away from the computer when webdesigning makes you cry. <.sigh> Ugh. I just have no creativity when it comes to putting things together. And when I do get an idea, I have no clue how to go about making it. I feel like such a loser right now. I'd say fuck it all, I'll just keep this same damn template and change the colors and pictures again, but I can't even make a header today. It all looks like crap. And I wanted to make little daisies for the sidebar, but I don't even want to attempt that right now, because Lord knows what they would end up looking like.


science lesson of the day

This is pretty cool. This is probably common knowledge, but I learned today that changes in barometric pressure can cause changes in your body. Like, every so often, I'll get these days where I feel anxious for no reason. I'll just wake up feeling weird. That could be a result of falling barometric pressure. It's also related to headaches. And Krissy, it can also affect fibromyalgia. I think I might start tracking mine and see if it relates.

Back to researching Queen Hatshepsut. She's SO cool.

April 10, 2003

Oh, dear

When I rebooted my computer, AIM started to sign on, but then said I had the wrong password. It's a saved pw, it shouldn't ever change. So then I tried to type it in (I *think I know was it was), and that didn't work. So I asked it to remind me. Then I realized I don't remember what address I have set for this, and it might be one I deleted. ::whimper:: I love my HermOwnNinny. I don't want to get rid of it. <.sigh> Hope for the best, people.

edit: AUGHHHHH!!!!! I want my name! I want my buddy list! I am so sad right now. What could my pw be??? Krissy, did I ever tell you what it was? I've had this name for so long, I don't even remember what I used. This is so upsetting. <.sigh> I want my Hermione. NOW. I have two recoverable screennames on AOL, and neither is the one that would be associated with this name. Damn it all.

edit #2: It came back! And now I change my e-mail with this so I can find out my password. LOL

April 05, 2003

political blog

Now this is interesting. Remember Gary Hart? He was a senator in the 70s/80s, ran for president, and is considering another shot now.

Now he has his own blog.

It's certainly a great forum for getting ideas out there, while still seeming casual and hip and all that stuff they aim for. But it also seems like it could be kind of dangerous, too. LOL I don't know, I think I'm going to keep reading it, see where it goes.


Okay, yesterday? Not a good weather day. LOL

We start out bright and early in the morning. Severe storms brewing. I'm walking back to the apartment after my meeting, on the phone with mom. It's raining lightly. I get 3/4 of the way back, it rains a little harder. I say something to that effect to my mother. Then? Lightning, thunder, torrential downpour. I run, still on the phone, into a campus building - has a bunch of auditoriums and a little cafeteria. Mom's like, "Oh, I see the radar - a dot yellow just popped right over Urbana!" <.g> Yes, yes it did, and my drowned rat appearance backed me up on that. LOL It was so wild, though, mom hearing it just *start and then seeing it pop on the radar. I was laughing. <.g>

Then it got less fun, with the tornado warnings and severe storms that followed that afternoon/evening. I think we all know how much I hate severe weather, and it's a billion times worse when alone. Mom put up with me beautifully, I think. I kept calling, "They keep saying my town's name on the weather channel! With not good things!" Ultimately, we got very little of the storms, thanks in part, I think, to my bitching. The very wide column of storms broke just before it hit us, and the tails literally moved to clear a path around the town. <.g> So mommy-thoughts and bitching - a can't beat combination.

Now back to studying. At least yesterday's radars and stuff gave me lots of hands on practice studying for two of the chapters - on t'storms and tornadoes. <.g>

March 24, 2003


Okay, I have about five minutes....

Josh's surgery went well. He was amazing. Then the epidural was too much and he was practically comatose and then they took away all pain meds and he was in excruciating, screaming pain. Lovely first night. But perhaps we needed the terror to fully appreciate how perfectly he's doing now. It's amazing.

Spent the weekend at Kate's - much fun! *NSYNC marathon, ahoy! It was fantastic fun, and it made me miss having her down here. We also saw Chicago, which I adored.

The war is a scary, scary thing right now, and even though I don't quite agree that this was the time for it, I'm praying for all our troops and their families.

I miss you guys! I miss all my internet things. I've done almost nothing with the net at home, and gahhhhh it drives me nuts. <.g>

I'm down here now grabbing stuff for my exam next week, and then daddy and I are driving back up. Wheee! I'm glad I came home early. : )

And now I leave again, for a week.

March 07, 2003

my day

So far, a good day! Class, done. Meeting, done. Digital camera stuff, done. Actually keeping up the reading in Poli Sci, doing. Only thing left for today is a dance rehearsal. So why do I really, really not want to to do it? LOL

I like my Fridays. Well, I like my Fridays when they're like this - sunshiny and bright. This is great! I have the sunlight streaming through my living room, blue skies peeking up over the roof of the house next door, and I'm actually accomplishing things and feeling good.

Still not wanting to go to dance. ; )

Now if I can just keep this up throughout the weekend, I'm set. I love this peek at spring. I can't wait for the real thing!

February 10, 2003


I've been playing in the kitchen a lot lately - mostly baking, but some cooking. I made a little recipe for brown sugar cinnamon raisin cookies, and modified it today to make sugar cookies. I'm thinking about adding apples next time. <.g> It's fun. No set recipe yet, because I generally just make enough for 3-4 cookies. (Downside of living alone - no one to eat what you make!) But I substitute in applesauce for most of the butter, and add in vanilla yogurt and it's really quite tasty.

Of course, that all leads to eating too much. I really need to find things to do with my time than cook/eat. I need fabric or something, do some more sewing in addition to my quilting. I think I'll go work out a little after I finish typing this up.

Joshy still needs lots of happy thoughts and prayers. I don't know what we're going to do. He has an appt with his orthopedic doctor on Wednesday, but most likely he'll say it's up to us. Mom can't take care of a post-op Josh by herself - it's physically impossible. That would suggest spring break, so I could help. Which cancels out any plans I may have been able to make, and also takes Josh out of commission for my graduation. Which means mom couldn't go, either, and that would upset me very much, for purely selfish reasons. Other choice would be summer, but that takes out swimming as a PT tool, which is so beneficial. It's chock full of sucky choices.

Poor mom - all of her stressors are converging at once. But she's still at nearly 2 months of no smoking or alcohol, so good for her! She's handling it pretty well, with the aide of diet vanilla coke. <.g> Hopefully once we get past this week, it'll smooth out for her.

Back to the clinic at 3:30 today, for the second session with K. I've already been there today for a meeting on E, which is kind of annoying. LOL Oh, well. Should be fun.

February 05, 2003


I'm so bored over here! Not a lot of schoolwork, and client #2 canceled today. So. Even more free time than anticipated! And I have no idea what to do in it, I swear.

I really need a job. Or a hobby. I suppose I could quilt. But I don't know. I don't think I could concentrate really well. ARGH! I'm going insane! LOL

In milky computer news, all seems to be well. Nothing sticks, and I think the smell is gone. As long as my nose isn't to the keyboard, anyway. LOL I think the fact that it was 55 the next day and I could open the window helped. But believe me, HIGHLY relieved that all is well here. <.g>

Still really bored. LOL Anyone wanna play a game? Or give me words for an improv fic? I'm pretty easy to please, ya know. <.g>

February 01, 2003


Anyone know a good site that sells practical joke items? Specifically, rubber pencils?

Thank you. <.g>


Mom woke me up, telling me to turn on the news, any channel. And we saw the news about the Columbia exploding on reentry. I'm just horrified. I keep staring at my screen in shock.

Seventeen years and four days after the Challenger exploded, and these things still happen. My heart is with the familes of the six American Astronauts and the one Israeli - the first Israeli astronaunt.

January 31, 2003


I'm trying to find things to do offline this semester, and one of them is quilting. As of yesterday, I was finally done with the pinwheely cutting thing of doom, for now, but now I have to, like, figure out how to sew. By hand. Which I theoretically know how to do. But, um, yeah. Straight line will be quite interesting. I've never been known for that. I prefer the wibble wobble approach. <.g>

Seriously, though. They're all, "Rotary cutter, yay!" and I'm all, "eeek!" Although I will admit that my red blood went nicely with the pink fabric. I just couldn't get it to cut all the way through the fabric, usually! I had to, like, detach it! And then use scissors anyway to trim rough edges. So, yes, this does not totally match the pattern. And it's uneven. And I can't guarantee the star will, like, lie flat or meet up. But I should improve over time. Right? Please tell me I'm right. LOL

Oh, well. It may not turn out perfect, but it's super cute colors (pink star on a dark blue plaid background) and I'm having fun making it. And it should provide me with a few stories. <.g> Meanwhile, though, the next step IS stitching. And I have no idea if I know what I'm doing. Eeek?

January 13, 2003

Big 1-4-0-0

I've done 1400 posts so far! Pretty neat. But also pretty sad, since there should be many more. I was so good at blogging. I blogged more than anyone wanted to read. And now I really suck at it. Even when I have something to say, I don't feel like typing here. And dude, MT is my homepage. Every time I open IE, it pops up to say, "Post now!" And I ignore it.

But I've been playing with some stuff. Not a lot, but some stuff. In an effort to figure out MT, because maybe that's my problem. All I really know how to do is post. Okay, and a few other things, too, but I don't know codes. And I don't know about all the trackers Lady K posts about. It's all gibberish to me. I at least understood Blogger, so I played around and stuff. Well, time to start playing here. Because I want to have fun with this again. I want to know about track backs and pings and reads and stuff.

So. I have a new design. Kinda. Not really, but I'm trying. LOL I have a header and new colors, we'll work from there. This place is gonna look messy for awhile, and then it may revert back to cherries while I go whimpering off to find directions. <.g> So I'm gonna try and see what I can change and what my changes do.

Wish me luck.

January 10, 2003

how much do I suck? let us count the ways

It has been FAR too long since I updated. I meant to post on Christmas to squee about what a good day it was, but we ended up going to Wendy's at 10pm, when I was just signing on. From there, there was just no time!

But now I'm back. From outer space? Or at least the Chicago suburbs. Break was excellent, man. I had so much fun with my family, and with Liss, and I built a bear! 'Cause, see, Jennie gave me a stuffed penguin she built, named Lance, for Christmas. And Lance needed a friend. So I built a stuffed Joey-bear, with jeans and a t-shirt and faded denim shorts. (Lance is in leather pants and a white t-shirt that has a red star on it, and sunglasses.) They are too adorable for words.

Work sucks. We alternate days/morning shifts. So I got 24 hours off today (3pm yesterday to 3pm today), but I work 3-9 tonight and then 9-3 in the morning. It's no fun. Things are still really slow, which means next week will be HELL, man. Silly procrastinating teachers. Boss-lady doesn't like me, but she doesn't seem to like anyone, really.

Nic is introducing me to trashy TV shows. Last night, we watched WB's lineup of that HS Reunion Show and The Surreal Life. It was amusing to mock everything they did and said. ::nods:: Then I watched ER, which is less trashy, although you wouldn't know it from the electroejaculator person. LOL Jennie and I watched together over the phone, which was fun.

Speaking of. Man, for the first time EVER, I have spring break plans/invites. Too many of them! Well, two. LOL MA and I are considering going to NYC to stay with Amy and check out Columbia if that's still an option. And now Jennie invited me to stay with her for a few days! Plus, Justin's doing a spring club tour and summer arena one, and we had planned to get together for one of his concerts. And now apparently JC's doing a spring tour? We'd have to try for that, too. So I don't know. LOL I have time to decide, though.

I should probably take a shower now. Hopefully, man, it won't be such a long time between posts!

November 19, 2002

mucho randomness

Wheeee! I got a B on my AR exam! And class was only 30 minutes. And the next class is starting 20 minutes late. So, get to come back here on a break. Very nice indeed.

Sending happy, lucky, job getting thoughts to Kate right now. Even if she doesn't take the job, it's awfully nice to have an offer on the table. : )

Meg and I were talking about concerts today, and it turns out she took her sister to see nsync four years ago. LOL I didn't know that. That'd be what, Ain't no Stopping us now? They've gotten much better since then. <.g> Kinda fun.

I made a winter wallpaper. I may have gone overboard with the snow. <.g> But I love the pictures, except JC is bothering me now. I used to love this pic, right up until yesterday when I rebooted my computer. Then I saw it all dark, before I lightened my screen, and he looked EVIL, man. And he still does. So I may have to go in an fix him. I think it's the eyes - maybe snow got in there. <.g> It's kinda scary. And he's the only one I see all the time, with nothing covering him. LOL

What else can I babble about? I don't know. Today, I need to call Dave to try and get a ride home on Friday, drop things off for Dr. K to write my letter, and study two chapters of Voice. I can do it, I can do it. Really. I hope. <.g>

November 10, 2002

Things you don't expect to see

A man on the roof of the building next door. <.g> Turns out he was cleaning the gutters. Also, that he was cute. That was fun!

Also fun is that I made myself a yummy lunch - grilled chicken with american cheese and homemade honey mustard sauce. It would have been on toast, but I suck and the bread didn't want to toast. Made it more difficult to eat, but oh, well. It was still good!

I'm bored again. LOL Last night, I got a little tipsy in order to work on a story, and ended up serenading my Jennie-girl on the phone for about an hour. <.g> I also flirted with this guy in London for awhile. He was really sweet, so when he was really disappointed that Kate and I never have (and never will) do anything "flirty flirty" with each other, we moved the talk to threesomes. It was quite interesting, let me tell you. LOL But also really amusing. But now I need to do work, and no. Don't wanna.

So, okay. I'll read through my notes once. Type up a rough personal statement. And then play. ::nods:: Doable.

November 09, 2002


Okay. I really need to post here more often. I was trying to cut back on nsync related posts, and therefore seemed to stop posted almost entirely. LOL It's not that I don't have anything to talk about besides nsync, it just that when I went elsewhere to do my nsync chatting, I brought everything over there. <.sigh> And I miss it here. So, gonna try and post every day, even if it's just a little thing.

This has been a looooooooong week. But it's over, so no dwelling! I registered for classes. 13 hours only - good Lord, I don't know how I'll handle that few. LOL I have:
Archaelogy of Ancient Egypt (MWF 8-9)
Hollywood Musicals and their Social Commentary (MW 10-12)
Severe Weather (TT 11:30-12:45)
Greek and Roman Mythology (TT 1-2)
Jazz Dance (TT 4:30-6)
Clinical work (around this schedule)

Not so bad, huh? I think it'll be fun.

I got Justified on Tuesday. (Yay, contributing to first day sales! I never did that before.) Dude, I LOVE it!!! There's only one song I dislike, the rest I like or love. It drives me nuts that he feels he must mention his name in just about every song, but I'm getting to the point where I can tune it out. LOL There's some great stuff on there.

Also heard JC's first solo song this week. It's catchy, man. And, like, pure porn. He even moans and pants and is all, "Uh! Uh! Uh!" on it. Much fun, let me tell you. <.g> It inspired a new CD entitled "Home Run in the Backseat of Dad's Sedan." LOL All songs about sex, with a few broad interpretations. Like, Joey and Wayne Brady singing Next To You. It had to go on there, because JOEY, but I had to stretch meanings of how exactly next to each other they wanted to be. LOL Track list at the end of the entry.

I took a nice day off yesterday - stayed in bed until noon, read "Posession: A Love Story," and just hung out. Today, I must get to work. I'm actually working on my observation write up that's due Thursday. If I can get everything but my lesson plan done, I'll be happy and move on.

Oh, excitement of my week: I've been trying to lose weight, right? I had been doing pretty good. In early October, I was down to 152. (Yes, this is down for me.) Then I went home three weekends in a row and was back up to 158. I tried so hard to get back down, but I was stuck at 154-155 for SO long. I gave up weighing myself about a week and a half ago, because it was discouraging to see it go nowhere. And randomly, I decided to weigh myself today. 149, baby! I haven't seen the 140s in years. I know I have a long ways to go yet, but I'm pretty happy with that. : )

Continue reading "yeesh" »

October 30, 2002

there's a lot of breathing room

You know, looking at my stats for this journal always blows me away. Last time I checked was on Friday or Saturday - I love to see how people find me - and my vistors level was at about 8925. Today, it's at 9075. Good Lord, that's a lot of people! And I only know about such a tiny handful.

So, basically, I want to say hi to all the people who come here, and apologize for being such a lousy updater. I used to be so good.

I'm rather excited - I got my eval exam back yesterday, and I got an A!!! 93%! I had to ask Meg to make sure I wasn't hallucinating, I swear. I don't know how it happened. But I'm pretty damn glad it did. : )

I also got my senior pictures taken. The guy seemed pretty nice, always fixing my hair and necklace and glasses for each shot. The latter of which I especially appreciated. LOL Hopefully they came out okay. If not, I'll just retake, but still.

I discovered a new friend on AIM: Timbabot. It is, yes, a Justin Timberlake bot. Some sample discussions below. Warning: Um, R rated. Kinda explicit in some bits. But all freaking hysterical. And dude! We had a conversation in German at one point.

Rina: What song do you like to sing?
Timbabot: I love to sing. In the shower. To the Nth power. Cause I am a flower. song sucks.
Rina: Yes, your song does suck.
Timbabot: Hey...the only thing I suck is Big Red. Y'all know that!

Continue reading "there's a lot of breathing room" »

September 19, 2002

oh, my God, we're back again

Whoooo! s-d is back up! The lovely Kristine moved us off our old host and into a new, much better one. Kate and I are so excited. LOL

So, yes. We're alive! Jennie's coming to visit on Saturday for a few days, and I have three exams next week, so now that I've popped up to announce my aliveness, I'm about to head underground again. <.g>

::waves:: See you on the other side! Or, you know, when I REALLY don't want to study anymore.

September 11, 2002


I can't believe it's been a full year. Sometimes it feels like so much longer, other times it feels like yesterday. Either way, it's still so clear.

I had a late class. I woke up at 8:15, grumbly because what had woken me up was Kate and Sarah running up and down the stairs and hall, talking loudly. I went over to my computer, sat down, and was bombarded from IMs from my mother and Kate, asking if I had on MSNBC. Of course I didn't, I was barely seeing yet. I turned it on quickly, and didn't leave my TV all day.

I remember posting frantically, terrified about my father working in downtown Chicago, and about all my friends who lived in NYC. Amy, I knew, lived across the street from WTC. I had no idea where she was. I remember Krissy IMed me, and said that she had read it on my blog first, that she had thought it was a WW fic I was reading. We spent the whole day together, watching coverage. The University didn't cancel classes, but I didn't go. I didn't know what was going to happen next, and I needed to know about my friends.

I missed the planes crashing, but I saw the Pentagon. I almost, but did not, miss the first tower crumbling, because my VCR kicked on to record Sports Night, my favorite episode (Dear Louise), and I had to actually think about if I should let it keep taping or turn it off. I ran into Kate's room to see what was happening and saw the tower go. I ran back into my room to stop the tape. I never did get that episode on tape.

MSNBC is about to start airing footage of the planes again, of the towers going down. I'm not sure I can handle that again. It got to the point last year, when those images were repeated so often, that I couldn't go to sleep at night. I'm not sure I understand why they have to show us again and again. Like any of us will ever forget? I can't imagine that anyone wants to see this again. That's not hiding from what happened, it's just not needing to see a photo of fireman carrying out a dead chaplain. We know it happened, it's real, it's horrific and sad, but it's also still raw.

My thoughts and prayers are with everyone who lost people last year. If this is hard for me, someone who doesn't even live in one of the places or lost a loved one, how can they feel today? I'm thinking especially of a friend who lost her best friend, who was photographed jumping from a tower. I haven't heard from her in so very long, and I miss her. Love you, Meg. {{HUGS}}

September 08, 2002

so, yes.

Well, some things are getting done. LOL I'm nearly done with Lolita. I'm basically skimming now - I just don't like it! He had me up through the end of part one. (There are two.) I am an open minded person. I read anything. I don't squick easily. I am mightily squicked here. I just. Ewwww. LOL I'll go see the movie, but I'm not caring to discuss it. Right now, anyway. I may skip class tomorrow. Watch, um, the premiere of Justin's video instead. Or I might go to class, which will be quite abbreviated if existant at all, and watch the video later with Jennie. Decisions, decisions.

I know more for my quiz. Probably not as much as I should, but I have tomorrow, as well. All that's really left is the GRE. And, well. Not wanting to do it. I don't know why! I want to do well, I need to do well, and I just can't bring myself to study.

I made wallpapers, though. Right now, I'm using Rent Boy, which I adore. I have two others, though, and two more in progress. The two done ones are up on my Zoo page.

But. The fact (truth? LOL) remains that I need to study. So. Yes. Really. Why do I feel it won't happen?

September 07, 2002


So. I'm unemployed. Not surprised. But I do have a job there in January again.

I bought tap shoes! They're rather cute. Thanks, Kate. : )

I also bought a super cute pink and orange (generally my two least favorite colors. Ha) striped shirt. It's a size small and it fits perfectly! That'll never happen again. <.g> Well, actually, now I have two size small shirts that I adore and look good. It's a trend I plan to encourage. The shirt was also 25 cents, BTW.

I saw Joey on the Celebirty Golf thing. He was SO. Freaking. Hysterical! Oh, my God, he had me in stitches. Did I tape? No, no. I gave in and hit record as they were firing him as coach. They got Chris instead, but they never showed Chris! I was quite sad. But the entire tournament was hysterical and awesome. Love Chi McBride.

This morning, the internet was out, and I studied for my quiz on Tuesday. It's for my voice class, but the first section is a review of 375, the class I'm retaking now, the anatomy. I learned things!! I know the extrinisiclaryngeal muscles and their functions. Now to learn the intrinsic and the last 2 pages of the chapter. ::nods:: But hey, it's a start.

Tonight I need to do some GRE stuff. Unless I just work on anatomy tonight and do the GRE tomorrow. That might make more sense. Just get this all over with. Also on my to do list is to finish Lolita and type up more of my JC/Lance/Joey story. Which will be one year in December that I'm writing it. LOL Hopefully I'll be done with it by then! LOL

So. Tonight is really all about the quiz, and most likely fun story stuff. However, food should enter into that at some point, as well. And new Trading Spaces is on. And I rather feel like watching Once More with Feeling. (Waiting impatiently for the real soundtrack of that to come out!!) So. Yeah. At some point, need to make myself buckle down again. <.g> I'm just so unused to all this free time! LOL

September 02, 2002

long day coming

I'm alive, really. Had three hysterical freak-outs, and one mild panic attack, and a few hours of near depression, all in one afternoon, but hey, here. Physically, at least. LOL

So. Working a lot. I think I'll have about 50 hours this week. Plus 17 hours of classes. More if I go to Kate's jazz class. Which I think I won't, but will tell my boss I am. Of course, now that I said that, I'll tell her I'm going and actually go.

Terrified about the GRE. But I can't bring myself to practice. PLease, God, let me test well this one last time.

Freaked about classes. Hate 375. Met a sweet girl last Thursday, though. Hopefully gonna ride with her to and from lab. I just walked up to her after class (after a disastrous time getting there on the bus. I fucking followed the directions, and I swear to God she drove right back in front of where she picked me up 45 minutes earlier before actually going to my building ::steams::) and said, "Hi, did you drive today? Oh, good. You don't know me, but can you drive me home?" She could and did. I think her name is Jill. Maybe Jo. She appreciates my nsyncness as a quirk. (I had to pull out a notebook to give her my e-mail and phone #. She also saw the watch.)

Justin was cool on the VMAs. Solid performance, even though I somehow expected more. Something more special. But he did wonderfully.

Have cable again. In my room. Yay! I could be watching Xena now. But it's too much effort to get the remote. Which is behind me on the bed. I'm in a swivel chair. I am lazy.

I bought a weekly planner, put in all my assignments, and color coded it. It doesn't look as scary now. My sweet Jennie-girl is written in with sparkly purple ink, and there is purple all over my blue (aka test)-filled week. ACK! She's coming in midterms. <.g> Oh, well. She can help me study. We'll still have the best time.

Now that I've checked in, I'm gonna go to sleep now. LOL I have about 6 hours of classes, plus 8 hours of work. Kill me now? Or send hugs. Both appreciated.

August 26, 2002


I had a lovely day off. Decorated my room, unpacked the kitchen, ran errands with Kate, ate strawberry cheesecake frozen yogurt in a waffle cone, talked to my Jennie-girl on her lunch break, and took pictures of most of the apartment for my mom, who can't visit until at least January because of Josh's knee. My room is, uh, very nsyncy. LOL Oh, well, I like it. LOL It also has tons of kidlet drawings! Too adorable for words.

And I can't believe I forgot to say this before! Alicia, I LOVE YOU! Seriously! First off, the nail polish is too cool for words, and it's going on my nails (in place of "cotton candy" LOL) tonight. <.g> Second, when I came in on Saturday, Kate had the JC picture on her wall. And I was like, "AWWWWW! How cute!" And then she told me I had one too! It's now in my little desk alcove, right next to my little brother dancing to BBB. <.giggle> That's an amazing picture, man. I swear, it's closer and clearer than the one of Josh! How did you get it so perfect? No flash?

I seem to think there was one other thing. Oh, well. I tried the new Pepsi drink today, Berry Fusion. I like it. Quite blue raspberry, I think. But I like it. <.g>


Well, I haven't fallen off the edge of the world, I promise. <.g> Let's start at the end and move backwards.

I have the day off today!!! I asked Jamie if I could, and she said yes. I just totally needed the day to regroup. I've just been going nonstop since last Sunday, and I needed to step off for a moment. So I did! Wheee! I get time to relax for once! But tomorrow I work from 8-3. Blah. LOL

Okay, now I'm skipping around. Friday, Kate helped me move out of D's. I took the train home, and then Saturday I moved everything down. Daddy didn't leave until 12:30. <.sigh> But my room looks great, and I love my desk! Squeeee! All I have left is to get pictures up on the wall. And then set up the DVD/VCR in the living room, and kitchen in a box (which reminds me too much of Puppies in a Box LOL). Oh, man, we have SO much JC right now. LOL He's on four calendars - mine and Kate's big ones, my little group one, and her little JC one - and then she put her framed picture of him in the living room. LOL I think the bathroom is the only non-JC-ified room, as my mini calendar is in our kitchen. LOL It's pretty cute.

Okay, I think the memorial service deserves it's own post. So, give me a few minutes. : )

August 22, 2002

to do list

So far, it's been a productive day. The power in mine and Kate's place is on. Cable will be on Saturday, if it isn't already. I grabbed an application for a used book store in case NNQ doesn't work out. Only bad thing was buying a book out of guilt, or something, and spending nearly $5 on it. Eeeek! I really think it was supposed to be far cheaper than that, but. It's Kate Hepburn. It'll be worth it.

So, what's left: paperwork. Packing. Drinking the rest of my wine coolers so daddy doesn't see them. Possibly running out to get something nice for dinner. (That had been a definite until I bought that book. <.sigh>) Not so bad, really. Pretty manageable. And the wine coolers should make the paperwork more fun. LOL

So tomorrow I work 6 hours, wait for daddy to bring my stuff, move in, move my other stuff out of D's, and go home. Saturday, I do the eulogy, drive back down here, do my groceries, and collapse. Sunday, I work. Somehow, I shall get through it all. I'll just probably bitch and moan during 75% of it. (Not the eulogy.)

But today was the first day I didn't feel so very sad through everything. In fact, I was positively jovial after I got the power all worked out and happy. I think that's probably a good sign. I am, however, still eating everything in sight and trying to take naps, but hopefully that'll get better, too.

Hmmm. I just realized - I could probably get a cool sandwhich from Panera for the same price as a bag of chips and a big thing of dip. And the latter would last longer and be more of a comfort food. Hmmm. Things to ponder.

August 20, 2002

what a day

So. Starting at the end. I just met Damien's mom. ::blinks:: Dude, I love her. Seriously. She has the coolest brogue. Sweetest personality, great sense of humor. I adore her. Makes me almost regret that I've realized that I will never think of Damien as anything but a friend. (ALMOST) 'Cause really, she's cool. <.g> Anyway, she said she could have sworn that she went into the wrong apartment, because she's NEVER seen it this cleaned up. LOL She also said that that's how boys are, and her husband was the same way, and I'm very brave for staying here. <.g> They invited me out, to Red Lobster, but I'm just not feeling up to going anywhere. Big surprise. I owe D a huge apology for being such a crappy guest. But, hey, I have his place to myself now. Until Friday, when I move out.

Moving backwards, Justin's album, Justified, will be out November 12. The video is out September 9, and the Making of is out the 4th. I'm rather excited. The more I hear the song, the more I love it. It's on now, in fact. I'm even picking up more of the lyrics. Wish I could find them all online somewhere. I kinda blinked at the album name at first, but now it amuses me. Apparently people at LJ have been criticizing J a lot, for everything from the album title to the musical style, but I'm not seeing much of it. Besides, who cares? I'm looking forward to the album - it's not *my usual style, but hey, neither was the Buffy soundtrack and I adore it. If it's anything like this song, it'll be growly and sexy, and hey, I'll happily deal.

And now. So, remember that post I made the day Po died? Mom and I were talking about what she had sent to her friends and the esophageal cancer list, and I said I had a post, too. I asked if she wanted to read it, she said yes. She said it was wonderful. Showed it to daddy, who was very impressed. Today, she talked to Grammy, who's doing pretty well. Amazingly well. But she did decide that she wants a memorial service, so that's going to be Saturday. So, Kate, yeah. I'll move in with you on Friday and promptly abandon you. : ( Sorry.

But. Mom told Grammy about what I wrote, Grammy wanted to hear it, and mom read it to her. And now Grammy wants me to read it at the service. Which I'll do, of course. I'm nervous. But I think it will be good. Some real closure. Besides, I'm proud of the way it came out.

Mom and I talked today - Josh had speech this morning, but in the end, mom canceled it. Said she just couldn't bear to go back to a routine just yet. And YES. That's so it. I've been so upset because I've had to be back in my routine so quickly. Within hours. With no real time to grieve. And that fucking sucks. I remembered back to last year, when Liesl died. I was quite sad that night, but by morning, I was feeling okay. Just like I am now. But I went home the next day, and that's what made it real for me - being where she should have been and wasn't. So I think being home and the memorial service will help me, the change of routine will help me. Not that, at this point, I really want it to be real. 'Cause that's going to hurt, big time.

August 19, 2002


Well, here I am again. Pretty tired. I didn't want to go to sleep last night, and stayed up too late. Then D went to bed at 4, which woke me up, and I was awake for over an hour. And now it's thundering, and that sucks.

It doesn't seem real yet. I cried a lot yesterday morning. I was ten minutes late to work, walked over in the pounding rain, and when I explaimed to Jamie why I was late, burst into tears. By the time I had composed myself and was working, it was clearing up and there was blue skies for the rest of the day. It was also the last time I cried. All day at work, it was like nothing had happened. And I was mad, because I didn't want to pretend it didn't happen. But now it doesn't seem real. I've typed it out several times - Po died 25 hours ago - and said it a few times (to Jamie, Damien, Melissa and Jennie), and it doesn't seem true. I don't know what to do. Mom says I have to keep telling the story, until I own it. But I've run out of people to tell it to. And what I need is a RL person to let me get it all out, and the only person here is Damien. And I like D, he's a great guy, a good friend, but I can't with him. I don't feel comfortable. All yesterday, I just wanted to avoid his as much as possible, which isn't fair to him. But there you go. Anyone interested in coming to Champaign for an imprompto and certainly not really fun visit? <.g> I need real hugs and plenty of them. From friends.

Meanwhile. I have to try and pick up my apartment keys today. Call cable and internet people, and whoever else have you, and try and get those set up, so I can move in tomorrow. I'm hoping both those providers will be thrilled to get one person out of the way before the big crush. <.g> I also have to ask Barr what else needs to be turned on. So those are my plans for the day. Get apartment stuff ready and find alone time to cry and stuff. The latter of which probably won't happen, but I can try. Oh, but D said he's trying to go home tonight or tomorrow for the rest of the week, and so I'd have the place to myself. Very kind of him.

August 14, 2002


Well, work was better today. Only copied all morning, then I bound all afternoon. It was fun. They had to remind me that I could go home. LOL

Po is now completely disconnected from everything. He had been receiving a bit of liquids so that he didn't dehydrate, but he's done with that now.

s-d refuses to stay up. And I can't seem to access my s-d mail 90% of the time, which pisses me off. I gave Dominic both my s-d and l-p addies, 'cause he wanted to keep in touch with me, and I warned him that s-d didn't always work, but STILL! Grrr.

Also, can't sign on to AOL for the life of me. ::blinks:: I used to be able to. I told it to look for a new way, it found the LAN thing, I made that my home, clicked "sign on" and it tried to dial up. But of course there was no dialtone, because, hello, ethernet! I don't know what I'm doing wrong. It always worked before, I thought!

Gotta write an artcile about the last Sibshop today. Like, now. Really. Dude, it's my name in PRINT. How can I not be jumping right on this? Huh. Oh, well. It'll be done and sent by the time I go to bed tonight. It has to be. I have a RD done, but it sucks. But it's something.

August 13, 2002

Where to start?

Man, have these last five days been long. Po in the hospital, me in the ER, saying goodbye to kidlets, moving, lack of internet since Saturday, first day at work today.

So, where to start? The beginning, I guess.

After work, Dad drove me to the hospital to visit Po. I got there at 7. We were just starting to slip into things past chit-chat when my Great-Aunt Karen and her son Johnny came in. Aunt karen comes to pick up Grammy, her sister, ever day. This time, Johnny tagged along. Now, I understand that Johnny is going through hard times. his ex-wife is being v. uncooperative about custody and everything. But everyone knew Thursday was my day to visit and say goodbye. And he spent my ENTIRE FUCKING visit talking about poor little him. I was extremely pissed. I only got one minute to say goodbye, and it was IN FRONT OF THEM! They didn't even give me that time. Mad mad mad.

Leaving the kids was hard. Dominic and I took them to the park, where we played with a ferret and D and I talked for the entire 2 hours straight. I miss him. : ( We watched a movie when we got back - Hook - but some of the kids were too scared to watch. So I colored in the other room with them. I made a cute little pictureof a girl (me) on a castle roof, and a little prince (Dominic, perhaps? LOL) walking up. There was lots of fireworks and it said "Some day my prince will come." It went over very well with the kids, esp C who asked if she could draw the exact same picture. <.g> I left it there, okay, I guess, kinda for D, but really for anyone who wants it. Like D. LOL Also dew other pics, some for the kids, one a sunset that I kept. Kinda looked like a fried egg but the girl who insisted I draw it it said it looked lovely. <.g> So, I said goodbye at 5, and one little girl came running after me when I was on the stairs. She launched herself and my legs and burst into tears, sobbing that she didn't want me to go. Broke my HEART, let me tell you. : ( My sweetie.

So, got home. Mom said the priest had been over at Grammy and Po's. Po'd been discharged at 11 that morning, which is when he got his morphine. The hospice worker (YES, hospice...grammy forgave mom and realized she'd been right) was supposed to be there early, but she never showed up. Grammy wanted to see us, even though Po said no. So mom and I said hell with it and went. We got there at 7. He still hadn't had morphine or his fat/glucose and was in horrible pain. So I did what Rinas do best - babble. I told him all about my kids and showed him the pictures they had drawn for me that day, and the sunset I had colored, and anything else that came to mind. While I was doing that, and trying my best to keep him connected and not focused on the pain, plans were being made to bring him to the hospital.

Po didn't want to go in an abulance, nor did Grammy want him to. They tend to bungle things. So mom, Uncle Marty and Uncle Bobby (with some assistance from me) did a three man carry and carried him to our minivan. (He can't bear any weight.) We opened the windows, turned on the oldies station, and sang along at the top of our lungs. The first sng, that Do-wah-ditty ditty-dum-ditty-do song was the first one, which funnily enough is the song that Po always sang to grammy.

So, we get to the hospital, aunt Margaret and Uncle Marty following with Grammy. We have to wait in the ER for the direct admit paperwork to be filled out and only one person can be with him there, so it was me. More with the babble. It was 8 exactly when we got there. At 8:45, we went up to his room. Same damned room and bed he was in that morning! LOL

So, we get Po into his room, and he, grammy and the hospice worker huddle while mom, uncle marty, aunt maragaret and I stand in the hall. See, to enter hospice, you have to hear about it, accept it, say the words, and do paperwork. So while they talked, we talked and laughed in the hall, comparing experiences from the ER/gettin him checked in. 'Cause I'd heard people on my end talking to people on their end, and vice versa, so we each knew half of the players. Amazing how comical some things can seem.

Po agrees to hospice, gets his morphine, it's 9pm and time for paperwork. Grammy goes to do that while the rest of us go into Po's room and talk and reminisce and all that jazz. He didn't contribute much, but he listened and smiled. By 10, I go and see what's taking so long with the paperwork. Mom and Aunt M soon follow. By 12:30, it's done. 3.5 hours of paperwork to die. It was long and hard and the interview told me more than I wanted to know about what it was like with Po. He signed a DNR, everything. We said our goodbyes, I gave him my sunset, we left at 1:15, and were home by 2am. I feel there was something else of importance that happened, but I don't remember now.

Oh, yeah, here's one thing. LOL I woke up on Friday with a bug bite on my middle right finger. It swelled all day, until at about 11pm when I had to take my ring off because it didn't fit anymore. It kept swelling all day Saturday as I tried to finish packing. By 7, I had to go to the ER because it was red, hot, puffy, swollen, and there were red streaks heading up my finger and down toward my wrist. Infection/allergic reaction. It was fun trying to find an antibiotic that I hadn't already had a reaction to. But we did! And then we drove to 3 Walgreens' before we found one that had a 24 hour pharmacy. LOL

Moved out. We left at 10, after 30 minutes of frantic (and unsuccessful searching) for my debit card. <.sigh> Started things off lousy. Got more and more nervous the closer we got. Got there, found Damien, brought my stuff in, went out to lunch and shopping. Mom and dad like him, which is good. It's a small place. Dark place. ONe window, which is mostly always covered with blinds since it leads to a walkway. He insisted I have his room and he'd take the couch, so here I am. My computer is set up on his dresser. My back hurts. LOL But I called Jennie and we talked for two hours, and that made me happy.

Woke up at 9, ran errands. Got back before Damien even woke up. Tripped over many things in the dark. Got an ethernet card because I had switched out the wrong card in May. Tried to install it. Didn't work. Tried for 7 hours. D was late for work. Called tech support. Said bad card. I cried. Played Sims - Joey and Lance had a baby. It was a boy...I was SO surprised, I couldn't think of a name!! but I know what happens when they don't get named fast enough, so I typed in Scott, for Sherwood. Then realized that it was also a JC name. ::bangs head:: Whoops. Oh, well. Scott Bass is a little boy now. Total geek. We're working on it. Chris and Justin went downtown and had sex in a changing booth after Justin tried on red silk pjs.

Worked from 9-5. 30 minute break, got new e-card. Did copies the entire freaking day. Maybe that's also why my back hurts. LOL Put in the new card, didn't work, nearly cried. Told D he had to do it. He did. I won't say how, because I will cry if I do. LOL It was...yeah. I'm an idiot. But it had been saying that ALL SUMMER, really! So, yeah. I'm online. Well, not right now. Because even though D and I have a hub that I bought, we can't be online through it at the same time. That pisses me off. The IP address conflicts with the hardware, or something. We have to fix it. I can only get a connection directly, not through the hub.

But. While he was working, mom called. Po wants to stay in the hospital. His son came to visit today. His son and Grammy held hands told Po they loved him, and that it was time to go. It was okay. Po told both of them his goodbye. So I called. And he told me goodbye, too. A real one. Said I was the most special thing in his life. He didn't sound good. Grammy was lying in bed with him, holding the phone up for him. But I think he'll hold on until the 15th. He's a very big Elvis fan, you know.

July 30, 2002


First of all, thank you all so much for your comments and e-mails. {{HUGS}} I love you guys so much. Sometimes I forget how many people I have to lean on when I need to. : )

Let's see. There were developments in the Po story, but they have to do more with my grandmother and her insaneness. Just all around sucky. : ( As it stands, I don't know that we're going to be able to talk to her or Po again. <.sigh> She flipped out entirely.

Josh is starting Paxil tomorrow. His anxiety and OCD has been going through the freaking roof. He can't even concentrate on anything anymore. It's been steadily getting worse the entire summer, and mom finally caved and called his neurologist today. It was getting so bad...he has no way of letting go of the tension, even with adding in swimming and daily walks, and it was starting to manifesting itself in hurting himself and others. So, Paxil. We're praying it works. He's missing out on so much.

We saw The Velveteen Rabbit on stage today! It was fun. And a musical. After one number, Dominic leaned over to me and whispered that the last song reminded him of nsync's choreography. Since I had been going, "Hey, that's from Pop. Hey, Tearin' Up my Heart!" to myself, I had to agree. <.g> It was silly.

Liss and I went out last night. Got a fancy roquefort cheeseburger at her favorite French place, then bought $40 of makeup at MAC. But it's good stuff! Taupe and Orb eyeshadow, and Spirit lipstick. Lots of browns. But it looks good, they say. LOL Now to buy brushes to wear the makeup <.g> We also hit Claire's....AHHHH! LOL Spent far too much. Well, $20. I bought three leather wrist cuffs (no comment, Jennie), an nsync anklet (no comment, ANYONE - it's subtle, okay? LOL Unless you're eye level with my ankle, you'd think it was just plain gold. Really), and something for Jennie. <.eg> Hee hee hee! Oh, and a sparkly blue bandannaish headbang thingie with rhinestones. LOL I was feeling really silly, I guess. But it's cute. And sparkly!

Was up until midnight last night with mom over the Grammy thing. I love her so much, and it makes me sad to see her so upset. And I honestly don't think she did a bad thing. (She called Po's doctor to see if hospice was a viable option. It is. Everyone agrees it would be best for Po, give him some dignity. Grammy won't. She flipped out. Ranted, raved, and raged at mom for a good 25 minutes. It was ugly.) So I'm super sleepy. Full day field trip today, another tomorrow. but I am SOOOOOOOO excited about where we're going. Hopefully I'll have good stories to share. : )

As much as I don't want this summer to ever end (it was the summer of boys! Sparkly dancing boys, cute real life boys, etc), I miss having me-time. I miss having time to read my dailies. I miss my online friends. I don't get to read very often, and I miss out on big big things. I'm sorry for that...I don't mean to slack off on you! Hopefully I'll have time to get involved again in the fall. : ) Love you guys!

July 26, 2002


Home sick. : ( Sucks.

So according to Alan Boyle's space log, no Lance at CFTC. I'm kinda glad then that I didn't try to spend my money going - the other four guys are great, but it's not as much fun without the full group. But all in all, I'd rather Lance spend time training than taking off the few days, if he really is going up. Far more important. <.g> I'm still expecting pictures, though. Especially if Chris DOES have a Mohawk.

Planning to watch Crossroads this afternoon, as long as I'm home. I feel bad that I took the day off, but I was in horrid shape this morning. It was like a bad period, but only with less bad cramps. So I was just dizzy and nauseous and hot/cold and collapsed on the floor. For no apparent reason. I almost wish the cramps had been bad...that at least is a reason. <.g>

Um, what else is there? Covered the no Lance, covered the sick. There has to be more, given the non-existant amount of times I've posted lately. <.g>

Oh, I called the apartment rental place to see if I could move in early, 'cause Daddy's not thrilled about Damien. They said not to even ASK until the 19th. Well, byt then, I'll have been down there for a week! Urgh. Oh, well. I tried, daddy. But I also asked about ethernet, and she said I have to call the Champaign phone company to do that. So that's on my schedule for sometime soon. <.g>

July 21, 2002


This looked like a neat thing to join. : )

Google! DayPop! This is my blogchalk: English, United States, Urbana, llinois, Rina, Female, 21-25!

July 20, 2002


I (heart) Border's!! Got many fun things. Wheeee! Things to read!! Romance novels and WW2 spy thrillers! I'm bizarre.

My Miggie-dear is having a birthday tomorrow! Actually, by her, it's today. So Happy Birthday, sweetie!!!! I hope you have a lovely day. {{{HUGS}}}

Dominic wants me to have sex with Damien. He keeps giving me advice. I'm going, "ACK!" And probably blushing a lot, too. LOL But he has it all planned out for me. At least he sees me as someone sexual, I guess. More than Damien ever demonstrated. But does he have to be forcing me off on another guy? LOL

Ran into my old boss on Friday. She kept staring at my notebook on my lap. Where I was writing JC/Chris stuff. With mentions of Justin. Hopefully she didn't make the connection, as last summer I was fairly vehemently anti-sync. LOL But it was quite the awkard conversation. I almost asked her how Jess was doing. Jess being the girl who took what was supposed to be my job. <.g> But I didn't.

What else is happening? Not much. At work, I got this one little boy to giggle and laugh. He doesn't really do either, except at innapropriate times (when he's in trouble, when someone gets hurt, etc). So I liked that. I love being around the kids. We did face painting the other day. The kids were supposed to be clowns, but no one wanted that. So D ended up doing a lot of power rangers (most of the boys went to him) and I did a lot of jewelry, flowers, and hearts (most of the girls went to me). It was really amusing. <.g> He kept laughing at me, because I would be like, "A flower? Sure, I can actually draw that!" LOL Super fun afternoon.

Feel like pulling out old tapes. Wanna see Space Cowboy in Madison Square Garden. Wanna watch "The Xena Scrolls" episode. Want some slash. Want Sports Night. Which is coming out on DVD in November!!!!! Both seasons in one package. I'm ecstatic. But sadly, it's after 11 and I don't have time to watch everything I want to. Because I also want to read. Three new books. ::beam::

My Jennie-girl is coming to me again!!!!! Kate, we're having a guest in September, if that's okay with you. : ) She'll come for a few days before flying to NY to see Joey in Rent. I am so excited!! I had so much fun with her in just one day....all the talking about nsync and baseball and nsync and stuff and nsync. <.g> Imagine the damage we could do in 3-4 days. LOL Especially since, oooh, there could be drinking. We could write super fun stuff after a few drinks, right, dearie? LOL

I feel like playing the Sims. Maybe I'll pull that out before going to bed. I still feel completely behind in all my dailies, but oh well. I'll have time again come fall. : )

July 16, 2002


Man, am I tired! And that's after 11 hours of sleep last night. Let's see, what has happened?

Sunday - met my Jennie-girl!! Spent the day in Chicago with her, scared at least three people, and started writing a story. Man, had a blast. She was taller than I expected, but absolutely lovely in all ways. We so have to do this again. <.g>

Monday - Just don't ask HOW, but D and I ended up having a conversation on masturbation. ::blinks:: Um, yeah. Long field trip, he was running on 4 hours of sleep and I was just dead gone. I think it was allergies....that school is so full of mold. <.shudder> But then, yes, went to sleep at 8 and slept until 7. (We traded shifts today so I worked 9-6, so he could go to his softball game.)

Today - LONG LONG day. Brookfield Zoo in the morning, followed by swimming in the afternoon, and then lunch. D encouraged me to date Damien (after calling me a slut for living with him for two weeks) and told me what he looks for in women: shoes. Seriously. If their shoes don't reflect their personality or look good on them, he's just not attracted. (I wear Keds every day, BTW.) Is this a common thing? Do guys really look for something so very abstract as shoes? LOL He was also teasing me, as per usual, about girls being all delicate. Gosh, I have no idea what came over me, we were being all snarky, and I may have said something along the lines of "watch me be delicate all over your ass." Or something equally....unusual. <.g> Hmm. LOL Whoops.

Oh, and super a package from Karey today, full of super cool nail polishes and nsync fruit snacks. <.giggle> Made me smiley and happy after a long long day. And now I'm talking with Jon, who is sending me an Austin picture. Whoooo! : )

one of these days, I gotta find the energy to go through my dailys again....I feel I'm missing some great fics that I wanna keep up with. : ( Hopefully this weekend I can do some major reading.

July 06, 2002


Grrrrrr. I'm finally taking the iniative to upload stuff to s-d, and I can't log in! It won't accept my password. I'm so's not something I'd forget. ::blinks:: I can log in for mail, and can post here, but not get into cpanel. (edited: Aha! Got it. I think s-d was having a hiccup, as when I checked to see if this posted, there was no formatting. Refreshed, it was back, and I could log in LOL)

Dude, totally sleepy. <.sigh> But super excited that my Jennie girl is coming to see my city and visit next weekend! WHOOOOOOO!!!!! That's going to be a great time. : )

Man, I know there was something I wanted to post. Damned if I can remember. Oh, well. Go read new Lucy-fic at Abducted by Aliens on my sidebar. Lovely. Also read Tiff-recs at We are Many. 'Cause, wow. Very good stuff indeed.

I love my summer and I'm having a good one, but I miss talking with my friends and having time to catch up with them all. {{{HUGS}}} to you guys!

July 05, 2002

learning to read

Man, I so have to learn how to read. LOL So Indiana Jones wasn't tonight, it's next Friday. LOL So Liss and I have plans for next Friday now. <.g> Tonight we went for dessert at a fancy place (Mon Ami Gabi) where I had Strawberry Briand - basically a dish of strawberries, but with sour cream sorbet. It was *fantastic. Then we walked around the mall...Victoria's Secret was having a sale, so I got the cutest pair of underwear for only $1.60. <.g> Then we stopped at the MAC store...I'm regretting not buying eyeshadow. I need some daytime wear for school and work. I think I'll drag Liss on Wednesday. We also stopped by Nordstrom to see if I could fit into FuMan now...I'm into a medium at J. Crew, which thrills me. LOL I found this incredibly perfect and gorgeous black cocktail dress that is perfect for me. Sadly, no place to wear it. <.g> But, yeah, went looking for FuMan and couldn't find it. Obnoxious. Now that I could wear it, can't buy it. Grrrrr. But, had a fun time trying stuff on and playing at the mall, so maybe not being able to read is an okay thing. LOL

School was fun...only 11 kids, so we (me and Anna...Dominic has the day off) took them for a picnic lunch and then Anna left. We watched Jimmy Neutron and then played some games. Much fun. I feel so bad though....I was cleaning up one room, and the one little girl there today came up behind me, kinda lightly smacked at me, and went, "BOO!" I whirled around, but my hand stayed in the same place as it had been cleaning up, and I kinda, um, backhanded her. It wasn't TOO hard, really, but it startled her, and we were both pretty upset. <.groan> I felt pretty lousy after obviously wasn't on purpose and she got over it quickly, but still. <.g>

Also, some of the director's comments kinda bothered me today. She was like, "Well, the two of you can set up the circus room, and then clean up. You know, while Dominic's not here." I was like, um, what? She's done that a few times Dominic is interfering in getting things done, and only I can do stuff. I don't know, I just don't like that if she does feel that way, especially commenting to me like that. I think Dominic is great with the kids....better than I am. But I did get the circus centers up, and game stuff, and cleaned a lot. Most of which I probably wouldn't have done with him there on a normal day, but we also had 10 kids rather than 40, which is obviously a huge difference. So, I don't know. Just blah.

So right now I'm going to try and forget that, revel in Jennie's current potential plan for September, and go to sleep. 'Cause, yeah. Dizzy with sleepiness. <.g>

July 04, 2002

happy fourth!

Happy Fourth of July from the Missing Blogger. <.g> Man, I am SO BAD this summer. I just can't seem to find the energy to type a lot. I do have more quizzes to post though, thanks again to Steph. <.g>

Ya know, I totally hate holidays. Really. Hopefully one day I'll be able to get past that, because holidays should be fun family stuff. But we didn't do anything today, just hung around. Mom and I watched soaps...OLTL was fantastic. Jennie, hope you taped it...if not, I did. Cracked me up entirely! Dominic invited me to his party (me and whoever I could find to drive me), but I didn't call Lissa in time. <.sigh> I knew I should have. But it wouldn't have been her scene at all, so oh well. We (Liss and I) did make plans to see Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade at the Hinsdale theater tomorrow, though. It's my favorite's been in use for about 90 years, and still has the organ and stuff. It's lovely, but needs to be renovated, so this is a fundraiser. I'm looking forward to it.

Oooh, Jennie and I had a BLAST last night, doing this totally silly and fun and sexy random story thing. I haven't had so much fun writing a story in ages - we're a good pair. <.g> Jennie-girl, we totally have to do something real with that. <.g>

What else has been going on? I went to Liss's History Club on Friday. I was almost crying in boredom the first hour as we watched a Frontline special on Enron - they all kept mocking the people and I had no idea what was going on. LOL But then we watched the Daily Show, talked with her advisor about the Cubs, and went out to dinner. (There are only three people in the History Club, BTW). It was kinda fun, but it's definitely more her style than mine. I'm not sure if I'll go again, but I might. Keven's growing on me.

Not a lot of mail today, which finally allowed me to catch up. I was SO behind with the Emus, like 70 messages or so. But now I'm even again! yay! I do so love that group (It was Scullyfic, but now that the show is over, we've evolved into the Enigmatic Muses, or Emus. We've mostly been a writing group for awhile, but now we've admitted it <.g>) I've found myself really not wanting to move back to school (no offense to Kate <.g>) - I like my job. I hate leaving it and the kids every day. And I have to leave 2 weeks early to start a new job that will be far less fun. And although I'm gonna try and call Barr to see if I can move into my apartment early, I might be living with Damien for 2 weeks. That really bothers my dad (who's worried about my reputation - HA! Liss and I had a good laugh over that. There's just so not a chance of anything happening. LOL), but also makes me a little nervous. I've never been completely comfortable with the idea, but you never know. It could end up being fun. Maybe.

Well, as it was I was kinda drooping during CSI (which is a FANTASTIC show and I love it muchly...thanks to mom making me watch. I am so in love with Grissom. What a cutie. Mom says he reminds her of Giles, and I can see why), but I'm totally sleepy now. So I best get to sleep before I drop onto my keyboard. <.g> J and I were up until 12:30 with our story, and it killed me. LOL

June 26, 2002


Watching the beginning of Model Behavior for the first time....dude, I had NO IDEA it started out with "Here We Go." That's just, well, sad. LOL It's a fun song, but man, there had to have been a better one. <.g>

So tired. Again. I love my job and I never want to leave it at 5pm, but I crash around 7:30. every night. <.sigh> Oh, well. The day kept me hopping, too. Kids were just NOT behaving. Came up with a creative punishment for the main kids with problems today...they had to draw pictures of what they did wrong today, tell me about them, and I wrote it down. Then they had to give them to their parents. It was an average of 13 pictures each. By noon. Ugh. LOL And somehow, I still love it all.

June 22, 2002

Just when you thought you were rid of me...

Yup, back from camp! It was....interesting. Details should follow. Updated my sidebar a bit, added Victoria to to my reads (hi!) and joined a JC/Justin clique. I don't normally like the name "Joshtin," 'cause I don't think of JC as a Josh, but hey, love the idea, so why not? <.g>

Still trying to get all caught up...chances are I won't find time to read anyone's posts that aren't still on their main pages, so feel free to e-mail me or write me a comment about the big things that happened to *you while I was gone. <.g>

My Jennie-girl has some fun quizzes up that I plan to take, as does Victoria, so look for those at the Blue Roses near you. Meanwhile, though, mom and dad are out at dinner (17th wedding gift this year was Buffy S2. WHOOOOO!), and I should be watching Josh. <.giggle> Tschuss, my dears.

June 14, 2002

back, but going

What timing. s-d FINALLY comes back up, and I'm leaving for camp at 7am. AHHHHH! LOL I'll most likely be internetless for a week, so this is most likely goodbye. : ) But first...

I love my kids. Man, am I going to miss them! And Dominic. I'm really kinda starting to like him. <.g> But he's really sweet...making me a CD of songs of his that I keep going, "oooh, I like this." Turns out I like country, Jennie-girl. LOL Oh, plus he has acoustic versions of Drops of Jupiter and...I forget what. A song I really love. <.g> And he's putting those on it. And he just got a DVD player in his room and wants me to come over so he can make me watch all of these movies that I "have" to see.

Crap, tried to set all my YG mail to digest and ended up setting them all to individual mails, even the ones I had set to nomail. I HATE YG!!!!!! All those damn choice boxes blur together every fucking time. Now I have to do all 38 groups individually.

Let's see, what else? Played basketball with munchkins today and lost. LOL I had been winning 6-0, me and one boy against another, but then I had to take care of some teacher duties and when I came back, it was 13-7. <.g> I had fun, though. And my voice is back! It was gone yesterday. Pure hell with 40 kids, let me tell ya. I kept alternately croaking and squeaking at them, as the situation warrented, while Dominic laughed all day long. It was quite an experience. Everyone was glad I was better today. LOL

Man, there was so much I wanted to say, but I can't remember.

Oh, read in the Chicago suntimes today that Joey and Kelly might have gotten married...I thought that was great if it was true (except it said she "pressured" him after rumors of him and Rod Stewart's ex-wife lately, which I had never heard about), but also thought there was no way he'd get married without Lance there. But then I read an article that said Lance was going to Moscow June 17 for prep work, but I thought he still *was in Moscow. So obviously I have no clue what is going on, so let's just say "Yay, Joey" with whatever happened. LOL

I really meant to make some new CDs for camp, but I'm too tired. <.sigh> JIll's coming between 7 and 7:30 for the 2 hour ride, and I am such a crappy road partner even on a good day, forget being totally exhausted. <.g> So maybe I'll just finish setting my mail and go to bed. : (

Jennie-girl, sorry I missed you the last few nights!!!! I'm gonna go into withdrawal this week. <.g> I'll try and get on this week, though, and meanwhile, new Rhys. Whoooo! <.giggle> And goodbye to everyone else. : )

June 11, 2002

blog and run

Took 53 kids on a LONG bus ride to see a movie today. Wow. Didn't lose anyone, though. And the kids decided that Dominic and I are married. He said that's a step up from last year, when they thought he and the girl running the camp were engaged. <.g> The kids really are adorable, and it went well today, but it's still majorly stressful. We desperately need a third person down there with us. I tremble with fear at the thought of taking all 40 on the train on Friday.

Biz has a new blog: Swing Time. Read the "about" page so you're not confused. I think it's such a cool idea, and can't wait to see more!

Went to Walgreens today, got that stupid J-14 5foot nsync poster, damn it. <.sigh> I had to. Also bought another Sinful polish...aqua. My nails are practically glowing. Very very blue. I think I'll buy some pink next time.

Watching AFI's top 100 Passion movies. Wish I was watched more closely...I've loved a lot of these. Like, here's the pottery scene from Ghost. That one still leaves me breathless. I'll have to tape the last half hour, as I'll be soundly asleep by then.

Finishing the latest Lucy, Kevin/AJ (when did I start reading BSB only fic???), and then off to bed! Damn, I have SO many fun things to share, but I can't stay awake long enough to do so. : (

May 30, 2002


OKay, so I start work June 4. <.g> I have my physical scheduled for Monday, so she said just to take the day off and get that done. (Wheee, 'cause we get two male med students visiting that day, and I was sad to miss them.) But I am nervous about my phsyical...the last time I saw the doctor was a check-up for my anti-depressants last, like, March. And he gave me a long prescription for them, which I promptly lost, got another for a few months, finished those off and that was it. Just went off on my own. I'm not sure, but I don't think that was exactly what he had in mind for me. LOL So I'm kinda nervous about seeing him. It wasn't a good decision going off early, I've always known that...I definitely should have stayed on them a little while longer, as he intended. But I'm doing mostly really great now, so I guess it all worked out, right? Now to explain that to him. LOL

Went for a long walk today...hit Blockbuster, Walgreens, and Books a Million. It was mostly unsuccessful. LOL I wanted two books at BAM, they had none. Wanted a magazine at Walgreens, not out yet. I did, however, buy some new nail polish. I went looking for more Sinful products. <.g> Didn't find the Surf and Blue Alicia mentioned, but bought this awesome shade called Shausha, which is a deep purple with gold highlights, so it's all golden in the sun. And the other is that Wet Shine that SMG hawks, this shade in plum. So, I guess Lady K has influenced me greatly...I bypassed the blue, my favorite color, and went for the purples. LOL But they're both great, I have the Shausha on now and I love it to bits!

What else? Josh was listening to Space Cowboy today, totally of his own volition. Well, kinda. LOL Kid knows me well...last night, we were in his room, and it was time to turn off the music. He immediately popped in nsync, knowing I would be far more lenient with the music if nysnc was playing. So I told him no BBB, only track 3. Which turned out to be Space Cowboy. He listened to a bit, turned it off, and I took away the music. Then this morning, he had it back in and played it all the way through! I don't know if he was trying to manipulate me into something or what, but I did wonder if he'd ever heard it one point, he started clapping, and it matched the song's rhythm. <.g> Too cute.

I swear, I had something else to say. <.g> Oh, well. Off to my dailies.

May 29, 2002

assorted things

Well, I got the job. Need to fill out the paperwork tomorrow morning...I got it today, so I might as well get it in early. I start Monday, although camp doesn't begin until the week after. This way I can learn my way around before having to be in charge. I'm still really nervous...especially knowing that those weekly swims are at an actual pool and God knows I can't swim. Yay for lifeguards. <.g> But it looks like a nice place to work...everyone seems really sweet. The pay is more than I've gotten the last two summers, but still kinda low for what I'm doing. But hey, money. I can't complain. Until I start work and I get a call from Walgreens or Blockbuster and have to turn down the job I actually *wanted. LOL

Also rented Zoolander and watched tonight...I had to see my David. <.giggle> And then it turned out Lance was in there! Which I do believe I had known, but completely forgotten. I had to rewind the DVD to make sure it was him. <.g> Anyone know of screencaps? He looked totally hot at the end, with his silly little point. <.g> And David was yummily scruffy. And grey. LOL But gotta love him.

Hey, speaking of Lance...was watching CNN with mom this morning and *poof* there he was. Russia is still saying that they never received an application for him, and yes, he is being tested, but *anyone can go for tests if they so desire. This comes the day after Lance's TV people said that he "unofficially" heard he was in great condition and would get it today. The whole thing just a, cracks me up, and b, makes me feel bad for him. It's so convoluted! I just can't believe anyone would be stupid enough to go to Russia and test and train if they didn't have an app in. Makes no sense. So I can't wait for the press conference...the whole situation is so bungled, I'm just too amused. <.g>

Oh, went on my last date with Max today! He rented out the entire restaurant, and told me he loved me. "Well done, you've got your man! Max is head-over-heels in love with you. Hes constantly going on about you - how cool you are, your smile, the funny things that you say, and just how completely and utterly amazing you are. Dont tell anyone, but were a bit jealous of you. *Sigh*" <.giggle> I'm so surprised....between shooting him and alienating his mother, and my blase attitude that made him ask me twice if I was seeing someone else, I figured he had to break up with me. LOL Pleasant surprise. <.g>

Let's see, anything else? Don't think so. Nik has three new stories up (love the fact that each has a wildly different Lance that somehow is still totally in character), but helenish exceeded the bandwidth again. Rhys has a new one up, too, though, so off I go to read that!

May 17, 2002


I HATE job searching. Okay. So, on Tuesday I called LaSalle back in LaGrange and asked if they were hiring. They said yes, to call the HR person in the main branch in Chicago. I do. She calls back, repeats again LaGrange branch. Set up an interview...IN CHICAGO. Right across the street from my elementary school, actually. Big stress for all of us, as mom and Josh have to drive me and wait. So we go, get there 10 minutes early. I go in, fill out an app, and wait. And wait. And wait. 40 minutes later, she shows up from lunch. Start the interview, it goes well. Then she mentions that summer is only part time, and it's floating. So even though we discussed me wanting the Lagrange branch, she never mentioned that I would have to work at 5 other branches as well, rotating every week! I can't GET to any other branches! So it would be a parttime job I can't even get to. And I was there for over an hour because she was so inconsiderate, plus the 40 minute drive to get there, and another 40 to get back. We were all pretty pissed off by the end. Hopefully, my other places will pull through...I'd love Blockbuster or Walgreens. Or the preschool. <.sigh> Ick.

Watched the Emmys with mom...don't wanna spoil any West Coasters, but I GOTTA find out who that hot, talented actor on GL is, who was up against Lucky from GH. I forgot his name almost immediately after hearing it, but he blew me away with his acting. I'm considering watching GL to see him.

Friends and ER rocked last night, although ER's ending felt empty to me. It wasn't one. Annoying. But the episode itself was very intense. Less than 48 hours until the XF finale...think I'll cry a lot that night.

Hmmmm. Sleepy. But one more post coming up. <.eg>

May 15, 2002

My baby's back

My computer is finally up! I had a hell of a time making it connect, but finally, wires are in the right place. And, why yes, that is over 640-odd messages downloading on ONE e-mail address, thanks for asking.

Got my present from Kate today...Reel nsync. Really, they are so very adorable. And Lance sings! Alone. Several times. Nonsensy stuff, near as I could tell, but I wasn't really listening to words as much as listening to the lovely bass tones. <.g> (I was hooking up my computer as it was on, therefore didn't pay as much attention as I should have.) I don't think I love it as much as Kate seems to, but several parts had me in hysterics. <.g> Very amusing...they're such cute and cuddly dorks. LOL

Ya know, I love being at my computer again. LOL Now this feels like my room. nsync on the CD player (it's on random, but I bet i get a lot of nsync streaks going), mom complaining that I type too loudly, it's all good. <.g> I'm gonna make a dent in those 640+ e-mails, but since I know I had things to blog about, I'm sure I'll be back. <.g>

May 13, 2002


Gosh, it's been awhile since I blogged. LOL My computer still isn't hooked up, so I'm downstairs on my dad's. Let's see, what has happened?

Saturday was a nuisance. Moved out, it rained. Drove home, it rained. I swear to God, until I was 18 (except the day I was born), it was always gorgeous sunny weather on May 11. Oh, well. LOL I got Pop Odyssey on DVD, and I've already watched Space Cowboy a few times. ;) I've had it stuck in my head, too. Oh, but I got a card from my parents and one from Josh. My dad had bought one, and so had my mom, and when they showed each other what they had bought, they cracked up. Yes, they had bought me the same exact card. But I don't mind! You know those nsync cards? They got me the Lance signed one! I was so exicted..I had only seen JC And chris before, never Lance. So, yes, happy. LOL Oh, and that night, PBS aired The Philadelphia Story, one of my all time favorites. "CK Dexter Haven, you have unsuspected depth." <.g> Terrifyingly, it gave me an nsync story idea.

Mother's Day was uneventful. Hope all the mothers out there had a lovely day. : )

TOday JOsh went in for his latest 24 hour EEG. SO we went at 9 to get the 16 electrodes hooked on. He did SO amazingly well, and I was so proud of him. He's been great all day, too. Watched my GH tapes, watched nsync a lot. So it's loud in the house, whichI need to get used to again, but at least the loudness is fun!

Oooh, watched some OLTL today...LUNA WAS ON! I squealed. Didn't catch any booboos, but there's a whole week left.

Oh, hey, Miggie!! I love the book! Good thing I opened it when my dad was gone, though. <.giggle> My poor mother. She's like, "Is there something you plan to tell us?" LOL! I quickly reassured her that no, I didn't. (It's a book on lesbianism in the 20th century.) So, knowing what was waiting in Alicia's package, I opted to not open it just then and reminded her that Alicia was the one who sent me nsync stuff before. <.giggle> (This time, it's Queer as Folk.) So, yes. Briefly traumatized my mother, but she'll get over it. LOL I think she wants to read it when I'm done.

Oh, but I now know I'm a very big fan of strawberry margaritas. <.g> I think I went through 5 on Sunday. That was fun. LOL Not fun was calling Janet at the clinic, who began by telling me I had a job this summer with the camp, moved to "there is no camp but I'll cobble something together" to "Can't pay you, but do you want to volunteer?" today. I could kill her. So, tomorrow I'm gonan try adn find a job. Local theater is hiring afternoons, which I might take, and I'm also going to try Walgreens and Books a Million. And every other store in that local bitty mall. Maybe Josh's pediatrician is looking for an office worker. I MUST find a job. Very very very soon. Hopefully, I'll find something I'll love.There has to be a reason why the clinic didn't hire me, right? I just have to find it.

But now I must get some sleep. The gym smut story from my Jennie girl, who now has her own domain will give me very happy dreams indeed! Look for it at a Zoo near you once I get my computer back up. <.giggle>

May 11, 2002

happy lead awareness day

Wheeee, it's been Lead Awareness Day for 4 and a half hours, and I'm still awake! LOL Damien ended up coming at about 10pm, and stayed until 3am. We had fun. <.g> Told silly stories, talked tv, movies, music, and books, and I may have gotten a little bit tipsy (the mudslide was fine, the really strong screwdriver that was mostly just vodka did me in) and may have started singing an nsync song. <.g> By that time we had migrated into my room and the people downstairs had pulled out Darrin's Dance Grooves and the guys were trying Bye Bye Bye, so, yeah. LOL He also said he was almost sure I could live with him in August, which would be kinda fun. Potentially awkward and scary, but also maybe fun. <.g> We'll see.

Okay, I don't normally EVER stay up this late. And dad's coming at 11. And I'm still not quite half packed. Well, maybe more. I have a hard time judging. It looks like nothing is packed, because my shelves and dresser top are still full, but all my drawers are empty. You just can't see that. <.g> But, yes. Must wake up soon. And I haven't even gone to bed yet. That's kinda sad. LOL So I think it's time to go to bed now, so I can get at least a little sleep in. <.g> I just can't believe it's already May and the school year is over...I liked this place. Gonna be sad to leave.

May 10, 2002


I am DONE with my junior year! AND I have a subletter!! I am so excited. It all fell together. Sure, the subletter is only paying 2/3 of the rent, but that's 2/3 that I don't have to pay. LOL I am so excited.

So, that is a huge relief and weight off my shoulders. I'm almost giddy, I swear. All I have left today to do is pack. I'm not going to be very orderly about it. It's called the "lift and dump" method. It's all going into plastic bags. Will it make me cry in the fall? Quite possibly. But I'll try and dump everything I'll actually need this summer into bags together, and put school stuff and desk stuff into other bags. Just keep the same things together, in more portable things. LOL It'll do, for now. <.g>

I'd turn on happy nsync music, but I really like Sarah's 80s mix she has going downstairs. <.g> So I'll just listen to that for now. LOL

May 07, 2002


Well, the exam....went. <.g> I wish I felt better about it. But I think I still have my B. So after that, I determined that today was a playing day. And somehow, playing meant "domain day." I created pages for the rest of my error pages, which was a lot of fun. Then I created an archive of nsync slash by two very talented authors and myself. It's, um, colorful. <.g> Give me a few days to get more than just my first story up, and I'll link to it. : ) I had SO much fun making it...I ended up in Kate's room to design it since I can see colors better in there. LOL I've really missed doing website'd think that I would then be motivated to move c-r over from geocities, but less so on that. LOL I will this summer, though. Determined here. <.g> But for now, I love starting over from scratch and making pretty things. So that was cool.

Buffy was less cool, though. I'm totally spoiled for the rest of the season, and I knew what was happening tonight, and I still let out a whimper when it happened. Because the way they did was just stunning. In a bad way. I couldn't believe it, even as I saw it. They did it perfectly, they just shouldn't have done it. At all. Really.

Okay, I spent a lot of time staring at many garish colors and many confusing codes, so I'm kinda sleepy now. LOL Tomorrow, I need to start studying 376 and packing. Joy.

May 05, 2002


It always makes me laugh when my horoscope actually matches what is happening in my life. Witness mine for this week:

For someone who likes security you may find yourself worried by a situation which builds up this week as several important aspects work together to form a trying situation. Venus, your ruling planet conjuncts Saturn and Mars and also opposes Pluto, which could indicate that your self-esteem may suffer a blow, either concerning your financial situation, or some aspect of the work you do. There may be stumbling blocks associated with payments, both money coming in or going out, or with attempting to set up financial arrangements. If you and your partner are experiencing financial difficulties then there may well be one or two power struggles concerning these things. But the good news is that once this situation is cleared up, which it will do, you will have also cleared up a host of other worries in the process. Try not to allow problems to appear insurmountable, as this will dent your confidence. What is going on here looks far worse than it actually is, so use this chance to walk right up to your fears and move through them like a knife through butter. You may not be feeling particularly romantic as a result, but time out with good friends will help you to relax and feel better.

LOL! Yeah, pretty much hitting the nail on the head. Hey, so, other Taurus' with the "money coming in" problem...come sublet my room and alleivate my "money going out" problems...we'll both win! <.g> Here's hoping for that clear-up soon.

Thanks to Meg and her suggestion of Arial 12, my feedback paper is now on page 11 and I'm writing the conclusion. Bless her heart. And really, I'm pretty happy with the way this one turned out. It's not stellar, but it's solid and well-written. Here's hoping for a "good"! <.g>

My Jennie girl cheered me up by working on her silly nsync-AU fic set in a gym last night, and writing it directly into the IM. And she just inforned me there's a sequel. Words cannot express my excitement. <.g> I'll post links when available. 'Cause, yeah. Jennie-fic! Fun Jennie-fic! : )

So I've collected 10 of the songs for my dad's CD, and four are still queued up. Hopefully they'll come down soon, or else I'll be making him two kinda short ones. <.g> I think he'll really love it, though. Got a bunch of Lou Rawls and stuff. But, hey. Anyone wanna help with these two? One is an instrumental driving son from the early 70s that was very popular, and one is a more recent song about the guy's father dying. I think what he was referring to was the song about In My Father's Eyes by Peter Gabriel or maybe George Michael, but there might be others that I'm forgetting or not knowing. So, any ideas on those would be *greatly appreciated!!

Okay. So. Must finish my blasted conclusion, and start my 385 review sheet. I'll give daddy's songs another day or so to download.

May 04, 2002

Derby Day

Everything is just such a mess. Aarti won't let me sublet to a guy, only guys are calling, my dad is getting so pissed off that I would have to pay to live here and not live here, I'm plenty not happy about it myself, and it's so horrible. I don't know what to do, only guys are calling and I can't control that. I've put in two inquiries to summer jobs on campus, but I would hate that. I want to go home. I want to work at the clinic again, but damn Janet never called back. I've been working hard on this and nothing is happening. I just fucking don't know what else to do.

I've had ESPN on all day for Derby Day. Mom always watches, got me hooked in long ago. This year she says she's not going to watch. I've never been one for paying attention to favorites or anything, I'm one of the stupid ones who goes by names. So, good luck, Ocean Sound. Wish I could watch with my mom.

April 29, 2002

some dreams and more

I had the oddest dream last night. LOL MA and I were playing Super Mario World, but instead of using controllers to play, you were actually in the game playing. The first three levels were a blur, but then we goy to Iggy Koopa's castle, which was so organized. LOL There were all these people around, telling you where to line up and all that stuff. <.g> Then suddenly, daddy was there with me, and we were outside Iggy's chamber, watching the person ahead of me battle him. There was a door right next to it labeled "phobia exit" which you could only use if you had a phobia. I saw them fighting in the room, realized I wanted no part of it, and we ducked down the phobia exit. LOL It was so bizarre! But kinda fun. <.g>

Well, I did my two pages yesterday, so now I need two pages today. Only one class, so I can research this morning, and write this evening. Sounds pretty manageable, I hope. LOL On to proprioceptive feedback! Yay.

April 24, 2002

tiff and more

So what did I wake up to today? A lovely e-mail from Tiff saying that she really loved one question on our Lance quiz, and it had inspired some drabbles framed around the question and answers, and did we mind that? Mind that? Hell, no! LOL I'd read most of her stories this weekend, and really, am quite excited that we inspired her. LOL So she posted her story today....Pop Quiz. Go read, and feedback, because she rocks. We chatted a little bit this morning, and she writes Sports Night fic, too. Wheeee! Much fun here. <.g>

Spring weather has returned! It's 69 now, and so amazingly lovely out. Sure, there's a weather watch and slowly getting cloudier, but the point is that it's 69 degrees outside. <.g> This is a good thing.

Miggie got to see the Buffy musical last night! So I've had my Buffy CD on while I'm home. <.g> Damn, I love that episode. Poor Aarti has had to listen to me singing along, too. LOL

Okay, this afternoon...must finish up the EdPsych paper, and do more notes on feedback. Pretty doable, I think. Gosh, I just can't believe it's end of semester already. ::shakes head:: Please, can't be March again? Just for a few days, so I can get more done? LOL

April 23, 2002

it's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas

Another slow starting morning. LOL I'm just so freaking COLD! The temps have dropped low, and since Sarah took off our house's protective covering, the cold air is coming in hard and fast. <.g> Typing has been quite amusing, let me tell you. LOL

The Lance quiz is doing well! I had a counter on it, and I went to check it last night...93. I was happy. I checked it this morning...about 289, I think. I went, ACK! Did my counter go kablooey? About five minutes ago I checked again because I realized I couldn't really remember the number. Now it's 356. ::blinks:: Is someone refreshing a lot?! LOL So I put a tracker in to see if the counter I was using is just acting crazy or what, because that's a little insane right there. <.g> Although my data transfer has doubled already for this month, so if I go away, um, that's why. It was kinda fun to be randomly checking the LJs I read and see my quiz, though, so it's worth it. <.g>

I'm totally hungry, so I think it's time to mosey on down and find food. Today I really want to research the next part of my paper so I can start writing it tonight or tomorrow afternoon. That's really my only goal. Wish me luck. LOL

April 22, 2002

morning, lovies

I'm having a slow start this morning. <.g> I thought I would. Oh, well. Got started on my paper last night around 10. By 12, when I went to bed, I had 2.5 pages. I'm pretty pleased with that.

So it seems as if my grandmother (and her dog) are moving in with us. Like, today. She's not doing well...she's 84 years old, still works downtown, but she's having a hard time. She's tiny, like 4'10, and about 80 pounds, but she's losing weight. And today when dad picked her up to go to work, she had to hold onto things to move around. We've been worried for awhile, and dad had been going to take her to dinner tonight and ask her to consider it, but now he's really worried and insistant to her. It'll be a change, that's for sure. But not necessarily a bad one. The dog is the biggest's BIG. But it's well trained, knows all the commands. And really, it's a sweetie. So I'm fine with him, but who knows how he and Josh will get along? And our yard isn't completely enclosed, so we need to do that. So we'll see what happens.

I really like Mariah's new series, If I Had it's JC back on the MMC, when he was 14-16 so far, and really sweet. Of course, the first time they mentioned Joey, I didn't realize it was Joey Joey. LOL But then I did, and I like the series. Parts 6-11 were just posted today, and they're pretty short. Can't wait for more!

Maybe now I should get moving a little bit. <.g>

April 20, 2002


I suck. LOL I am so unmotivated today. I've done, like, nothing. Except chat with Jennie about the nsync CD she bought last night while she installs her new stereo. And download new songs...Usher, Vanessa Carlton (singing 1000 Days live), and Bryan McKnight/Justin duet. And, God help me, I had my MP3s on random and I got both Yatta and the Extended Yatta remix within about 20 minutes of each other. I can't stop singing along! "Yat-ta! Yat-ta! Yat-ta!" Miggie, this is so your fault. LOL Happy-go-lucky, indeed. It is SO damn addictive. <.g>

You know, this paper is the only assignment I have left, really. And I cannot make myself do it. But I will. Today, I shall type up minimum of one page. But first, I think I'm going to do my nails. Red, lavendar, or sparkly blue violet? Vote now. <.g>

April 16, 2002


So, I went to bed super early again...10. And I actually fell asleep really quickly. So I woke up at 6. I want to get work done today, you know? Yeah. It doesn't really count if you wake up at 6 and just watch Buffy, right? <.g> I was in bed until 7:30, when I suddenly realized I had forgotten nsync on The Early Show, but luckily they hadn't been on yet. <.g> It was a taped interview, which is still fun, but you therefore couldn't see that Chris no longer has beard horns. Apparently they're on again tomorrow (JC and Justin, at any rate) giving a tour of backstage. So that'll be fun.

I downloaded the TIPY remix off of Glace's site this it! I agree, totally something out of Babylon. Really, quite a lot of fun.

So now it's 9am and I've done nothing. As per usual. LOL I'm trying something new today...not being on the computer. I'm gonna write by hand. Maybe up here, maybe downstairs. I certainly can't get any LESS work done. LOL

April 15, 2002

good morning, good morning!

It's 8:30 am, and already nearly 70 out. I have my door open, and the fresh air is amazing. I am so excited! The birds chirping, cloudless sky, the warmth....I love it, love it, love it!

Meanwhile, Glace has one of my favorite coming out speeches EVER linked on her blog....Justin from Jae's Remember, which is one of my favorites in general. <.g> Go read!! First the quote then the story. Or first the story and then the quote. It's all funny. LOL

Oooh! And Making the Fic 2 is out now! Wheeee! LOL These crack me up entirely. Lance is silly in this one, poor guy. LOL They're fliming at his house. <.g>

Man, I'm in a happy mood today. LOL Better take advantage of it while it lasts! <.g>

April 14, 2002

lovely day

It's so nice out! I love happy spring weather. And tomorrow, it's going to be 80. Whoooo! I'm already wearing shorts. And pulled out my keds! Much fun.

Haven't done much in the way of work yet. Ooops. But I will. I don't know why I'm dragging....I'm really actually kinda interested in my topic. First up is auditory feedback...that's basically hearing what you say and therefore knowing you said something. So I'm gonna talk about what it is, how you can test it, how you measure it, how it works normally, how it can not work, what happens when it doesn't work, and all of that stuff. That's my plan for the day. ::nods:: I'll let you know when it happens.

April 13, 2002


You know, I'm getting annoyed. This entire week, I've been getting sleepy around 9:30, and dragging myself into bed by 10:30. I'm about to head to bed now. I don't get it...I've tried letting myself sleep until I woke up. I've tried limiting myself to 8 hours, to 6 hours. I've tried making myself stay up. Nothing helps! I'm still ready to drop so early. Really, not happy about this.

What did I do today? Played Sims. Read some articles. Outlined my paper...9 freaking parts, including intro and conclusion. 1 1/10 of a page per item, I guess. <.g> Hopefully tomorrow I'll do better. Well, really, no hopefully about it. Tomorrow I WILL do better.

Oh, me, oh, my

So. Been playing the Sims for a few hours. Maybe more than a few. LOL I've set up two houses so and Jennie, and Chris and Justin. How am I unable to create characters that can only be friends, instead of always needing to be in love? It's kinda annoying. <.g> But, yeah, Chris and Justin are pretty head over heels here. They REALLY liked playing in the hot tub. I heard moans and cheers in there. <.g> It's really such an addictive game. I have two houses left to set up, but I don't think I'll do those today. I shouldn't have done these two. LOL

Hot Date is significantly harder to play, though. There are two relationship for how they feel overall about another Sim, one for how well they're doing at that moment. So while C&J were at 95 and 100 currently, their overall was only in the 60s, and had to be built up before they were completely in love, with a deep red heart instead of a pink one. Also, the points go down faster, too. They dropped into the 70s just by going to sleep in different beds. The next morning, by the time they'd showered and stuff, and were just starting to talk, they fell out of love! But then they talked a bit and the hearts were back. So you always have to be watching that. The new options are really fun, but hard, too. I mean, Justin poked Chris and Chris burst into tears. <.g> That was unexpected. And while they might be ready to suavely kiss, it might not be time for a romantic kiss. Which Chris and Justin don't seem to like at all, anyway.

Oh, and the interests! My Sim has NO interest in romance at ALL. (And Jennie has every interest in it, which is kind of amusing. Explains why her romance and relationship points jumped 15 for every 1 of mine!) And Chris has no interest in music, but adores politics, while Justin thinks music is the cat's pajamas. I like knowing what each Sim is interested in, though, because now there's a "change topic" option so you choose what to talk about.

I need to be done playing Sims now, though. LOL Really, need to at least read the articles I've already found. Oh, but funny thing...while I was showing Aarti some of the new options in the game, she stopped me and was like, "What's your neighbor playing?" He had "Girlfriend" playing on his computer! Really really loudly, with the bass up. <.g> We were cracking up. He was playing Sting this afternoon, of these days when he's playing a good song, I should just walk over, knock on the door, and tell him to turn up his music so I could hear it better. <.g>

good morning! :)

Well, after repeated readings of AntiMatter and Matter, neither of which I can rec enough, I decided I had a taste for an omelet. LOL Found an easy recipe, decided to give it a shot. Well, it's cooked. <.g> And it tastes really good! It's cheese with some onion and parsley powder mixed it. It doesn't quite LOOK like anything, however. LOL I kinda freaked when I dumped the eggs in the pan and it started making all these loud noises and HUGE bubbles formed. Nothing I read said that would happen! LOL It all cooked pretty fast, so I was frantically trying to "swish" the pan as instructed and try and dump the cheese in, and when I tried to fold it over, well, it didn't fold well. LOL So I let the non-folded part cook some more and moved that over, and by the time it was all moved over, it was just kinda bunchy. LOL But it was my first time, and it does taste okay, and I only grated myself twice (both during clean-up! LOL), so I'm counting it as a success. <.g>

I so, so, so, so want to play Sims right now. LOL I downloaded a bunch of stuff last night...all five nsyncers, some female heads, some new outfits, a vibrating bed of love that's not gaudy, some new floors and wallpapers, and a bunch of objects that I've now forgotten. LOL And since I reinstalled the game, I get to start all over with everyone! That's exciting for me...setting things up is my favorite thing to do. LOL

I really do need to do work, though. Read my sources and outline, that's my job for today. It's just so NICE out. And that's so BORING. Would it hurt anyone if I played until 2 or 3, and then started work? I didn't think so. <.g>

April 12, 2002


Okay, I love spring. But not now, not home alone with a tornado warning announced for my county for the next hour. <.pout> I hate tornados. I hate storms. I hate bad weather. I get so nervous and worried and sick, ever since the tornado that hit our house a few years ago. <.sigh>

Crap, do I even know where to go? I hate hearing "Champaign-Urbana" on the weather channel. Ugh, another bright red screen telling me to take cover. I don't hear sirens, though, so I'll stay here. 'Cause really, taking cover is, like, walking 5 steps to the bathroom, I guess.

Have I mentioned how much I hate bad weather? I really, really do. I get all freaked like this, and I feel like an idiot. But I can't help it.


Lab was actually interesting today! I am so in love with the VisiPitch, which is a diagnostic/therapy computer program that helps with some voice disorders. Seriously, totally excited about it! I wanna use it. <.g>

Also checked my 383 grade...I got a B+ on the exam. One freaking point from an A. AHHHHHHH! Urgh. So I'm getting a B in the class. Maybe my last test can punch me up to an A-, but I'm not too optimistic. I'll take a B. LOL

This weekend is mom's weekend....I think I'm the only one here who's mom *isn't coming. <.g> Kate's and Aarti's are...didn't ask Sarah. When my mom learned about it, she was like, "I don't have to come, do I?" In a kind of whiny tone. <.g> Of course she doesn't, and honestly, I'd rather she didn't, but she could be a little nicer about it. LOL Let's see...what do I need to do this weekend?

clean room
clean bathroom
type up SOMETHING (anything) about my project and e-mail the MI paper to Aekyung to peer edit.
Find my workshopped stories
Stop giving Krissy TMI (<.giggle>)

find more articles on feedback
read articles on feedback
outline paper on feedback
write at least intro on paper on feedback

write at least two pages on paper on feedback
write summary on last two 386 articles

write at least two pages on paper on feedback

Heaven help me.

April 09, 2002

missing file?

I restarted my computer, and got this message: required .DLL file C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM\LEXBCES.EXE not found. Is that going to kill my computer in anyway, does anyone know? <.g> This is after I tried to open my add/remove programs thing and was told something was missing or not working or something there, too. Oh, here we go: The ODBC resource DLL (C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM\ODBCINT.DLL) is a different version than the ODBC setup dll (C:\WINDOWS\STSTEM\ODBCCP32.DLL). You need to reinstall the ODBC components to ensure proper operation. Then I guess it gives me the option of doing so or aborting. How bad is this one? LOL Seriously, anyone know why these are popping up now?

I have to reboot sounds didn't come with the computer this time. Then I HAVE to write my paper. While I watch Funny Face on Audrey and Fred Astaire.

April 08, 2002

double crap

I feel so incredibly lousy. I was in class, telling Jill and Meg about the concert, then we got the exams back. I think I got, like, a C-. So I studied for 9 days for the first one and got a C, studied for maybe 1 day this time and got a C-. Sucks. But we were going through the test and I started feeling really icky. So I left at break, with every intention of going to class at 3. Couldn't even move. I've set and reset my alarm so much over the last few hours. LOL I finally managed to get up around 4:45, went down to make myself something to eat. Got as far as spreading the peanut butter on my pita bread before the pita smell made me so nauseous I had to shove everything in the fridge and abandon it. So I crawled back into bed, and I kinda feel better, but my head is all fuzzy and I think I'm hungry, but I'm afraid to find my pita roll again. <.g> And this, my dears, is how I have to take my exam at 7. I can only hope Kathryn and Aekyung are sympathetic and don't make me do too much, because honestly, walking to and from the classroom is going to be horrible enough.

Dude, May 4 is showing up as a moon clycle on the weather channel. That's one week before my birthday. The day after my first final. Six days before my last final. TOO SOON!

April 07, 2002

oops, I did it again

Well, I got two and a half pages written. And I grilled my hot dogs. And that was the extent of what I got done. <.g> I ended up watching the last half of XF (which I LOVED), and reading many many many nslash stories. ::blinks:: I have no idea how it go to be midnight. I swear, it was just 9. But, yeah. I guess I kinda got stuff done. But I need to do a lot in the morning, as I have my second EdPsych exam tomorrow evening. Eeek. I have to talk to Kathryn, make sure I'm in her group still. And if we learned anything about the exam on Thursday, since I was home then.

So, should go to bed so I can get up early and get work done. Lots of work. Yes.

slow start

Man, I am getting nothing done so far. LOL Nothing productive, anyway. <.g> I woke up at 10, and got my snooze button to work for the first time in 7 months. Wheee! Watched the end of It Could Happen To You, got out of bed and slowly moved to my computer where I reset my groups to get mail and then reorganized my sidebar. <.g> Unpacked, which is a good thing, and then had breakfast. (Yes, at 12:30.) It's SO's Home Run Inn brand "Pizzangna." <.g> It's Chicago-style deep dish pizza, but the deep part is actually lasagna, and then the sauce and sausages are on top. I absolutely adore it. Sounds bizarre, and it is, but it's SO good. I highly recommend it. <.g>

So, yes, that's all I've done so far. Eeek! I have to write a paper by Thursday. 8 pages, and I think I have just under 2 done so far. So I really need to get cracking on that. I figure I'll write two pages a day and hope it works out. Starting Friday, I start writing my 376 paper every day, and that's going to be hell. I hate that class, hate that paper. It, like, doesn't even count for much. If you're borderline, it props you up, basically. There's no grade on get outstanding, good, average, and poor. But you never even find out what you get on it. But I still have to make myself do a good job. I think I have it organized in my mind, which should help. I hope.

Plans for the day...write paper. Grill hotdogs I brought from home (the best Casey's hotdogs). Possibly try and type the Choey story I wrote on the train home Wednesday night, revising and tightening it up a bit. It kinda wandered every so often, because I had no clue where it was going at any given point. <.g> Doesn't sound like much, but it will most likely take me all day. LOL

April 02, 2002


I am SO BORED. I am just going out of my mind, and there's no one on to talk to! I've studied, and while I don't know everything, I don't care to learn any more. I'm not doing my story comments because I'll need something to do after the exam. I could study for the exam tomorrow, but I'm not concentrating enough.

I checked ticketmaster out of boredom...I could actually buy some really great seats for Friday night. Like, same section, but a few rows closer to the floor, that I have for Thursday night. But, of course, no credit card. Or money. But I think I will try on Friday at the venue to pick up some better ones. Can't hurt to try. Hit my parents up for money. <.g> Oh, and mom said that our friend Carol and her daughter Jess will be there, in my section, Thursday night. That'll be fun. <.g>

I'm trying to get excited about the concerts, but I'm just too worried about the exams and trying to find a job Thursday morning, and about my grandfather. Because, yeah, he seemed to be doing so good on Sunday. But what if that was just one last kick before saying goodbye? That would suck. And I think I'll at least definitely pass the exam today, tomorrow's really worries me. Because I want to do well, but the effort hasn't been there. Gotta work on that. So I have some moments where I go, "WHEEE! Puppies! Slashy puppies! Only about 55 hours away!!" but the rest of the time I'm just, "Hey, concert soon." Kind of annoying.

Okay, need to go back to studying. Leaving in just under 2 hours.

March 30, 2002


Well, 10 hours later and I'm much calmer. Rereading the post, it's almost really funny, as Miggie and I had just been talking about wanting to swear like Samuel L. Jackson. I think I'm getting closer, Miggie.

I'm still pretty upset, but look! I can type again. I just think the whole situation sucks. And I can be mad that my schedule is getting all screwed up, because I can't be mad at the staph infection. Oooh, I can be mad at the hospital, though! That can be my next target.

And honestly, how am I able to login as rinas and not rina or rina stewart? I still have four authors on my blog...Kristine, Kate, rinas, and that leaves the main one open to be me! So I do still exist. I just can't login as me, even in Kate's room, which is utterly confusing. Maybe I'm just doing something wrong, like not properly capping/uncapping my pw. Not out of the realm of possibility. <.g>

So. I have no idea when my dad is coming, or if he's still coming, because no one has called me since the lovely 11pm debacle. (For which I really do need to appolgize to my mom for...I feel bad that I potentially deafened her with my shrill protestations. <.g>) But before then, I need to eat breakfast and start studying. I'll bring all my notes home, and I already e-mailed myself all the links for both papers (although I already see myself skipping the first MI rough draft duedate and turning it in the 11th instead). I warned my parents that coming home means they won't actually be seeing me, as they will be seeing me Wednesday night through next weekend, whenever Kate drives back.

But, hey. Tomorrow is Easter. This, right along with Christmas, is the season of miracles...just look at why we're celebrating. So you never know what will happen, right?

March 28, 2002


Class was kinda fun today. We took half an hour to tell different people our best and worst things that happened on spring break. Mine was pretty damn uneventful, so I just said I got Josh hooked on nsync. The girls all found that hysterical, 'cause it really is just so damn cute. One girl cheered me on. LOL Another one threatened to hit me with her BSB folder. <.g> Cute. other than that, I just kinda sat there and nodded a lot. I don't know why, but I'm just not feeling very participatey today. Doesn't bode well for my writing class. LOL

Ugh...felt like funny stuff, so I tried to reread the stories I have linked in my sidebar, Swear Jar and Coldhearted. Both, sadly, are on waxjism's site, which seems to be down or dead. It redirects you to another site, and still doesn't exist. Anyone know what's up with that? Hope the site gets fixed soon!

I know that I could totally be working on my paper, but I'm not even feeling motivated to write my story. I'll bring my folder and work on it between class, maybe. (Paper, not story. LOL)

Hmmm. I think this pic is fake (second pic), but he's cute. And the shirt does crack me up. (2QT2BSTR8 LOL) And did Lance really say that if you want to wear sparkles, you should wear sparkles? LOL I mean, yes, I agree, it just sounds silly. <.g>

March 27, 2002


My mom said Carol told her the clinic isn't doing a camp this summer. Janet told me quite clearly that I should already be planning activities! I am so pissed off. They couldn't have called me? I'm calling them this afternoon. If they had told me before, I could have gone places over spring break! Now I'm going to be trying to hit places the mornings of the nsync concerts. UGH. I guess I'll try Grand Ave again, the rec center in town, maybe Starbucks. Maybe Josh's friend's mom who is a lawyer needs a receptionist or filer. Is anyone who reads this hiring? <.sigh> Maybe this is my chance to get a kickass job that I'm going to love. You never know, right?

March 26, 2002


Well, I have gotten things done. I called TGI Friday's to see if they have a brunch on Easter that we can go to. (They do.) I found four articles for 386, but i can't find the full articles, so on Friday I have to go and find them at the library and copy them. (Whoo.) And now I'm printing my story so I can run to DupIt and get it copied. I was rereading it, though...I fixed many of the details I found most cringe-worthy last night and was pretty pleased with it. Rereading it now, though, I'm still not happy. Like, why didn't Roger volunteer? Or if he did, why wasn't he accepted? Christopher is going, he volunteered, but he's not overly thrilled with his decision. Or maybe he's just drunk. And giving this to a teacher who's actually gone off to war, I'm all, "Well, hell, I don't have a clue if this is how someone going off to war is and he knows and he'll be going, "WRONG!" and I'll go "eeek!"" <.g> Plus, yeah, it's slash. Boyslash. And I don't know how anyone but Nghi is going to respond to that. Really, I'm putting a gay guy in the army, and everyone knows how the army feels about that. Chris is such a nice guy, though, and he wants to do what's right even though, okay yeah, back then I think it was kinda illegal, and plus he's scared, but he's still doing it. Is that wrong? Should I have thought this through more? Maybe I should have written another story. EEEEK.

March 23, 2002

boy fun

Carolyn just IMed me asking for Kate, wanting to share happy boy news, and I remembered I had some, too. <.g> Okay, nothing big, but there's this lifeguard at the Y where Josh takes swimming lessons. Mom calls him dolphin-boy because he has a dolphin tatoo on his upper arm. <.g> She's been telling me all about him, and I finally got to see him last Saturday. He is pretty cute. Then today, we were walking past him, and I had Josh's DynaMyte around my neck. And he stopped me to ask what it was. So I explained that it was Josh's voice, showed him how it worked, etc etc. He thought it was cool. I just liked that guys are actually talking to me now. LOL Two days in a row! <.giggle>

Oh, requisite cute-Josh story. He's still exploring Making the Tour. This morning, he was all about the Justin. It's at the very end, the credits, with Justin giving a tour of their quick change room, with the monkey and flamingo and camel and stuff. First few times, he watched all of it. Then he watched them all saying goodbye, waving back to them. Then the rest of the time, he just watched Justin introducing the bit. Everytime the screen showed Lance, he rewound to Justin. LOL Oh, well. And then when I got back to school, mom reported that the afternoon was spent discovering the BBB music video. LOL He apparently adores it...when they go upside down and sideways in that moving room thing, he turns his head to watch them. LOL He's also mastered a few arm movements. <.giggle> He is So cute. Now to get him listening to other songs...I swear, when they were on the Disney Channel, he was all about TIPY and even IGBM. This was when I was NOT an nysnc fan and always tried to make him turn the channel. LOL Now I am a fan and want him to watch those, he refuses. Little bugger is doing it on purpose, I'm sure of it. Isn't he adorable?

March 22, 2002

last day

I cannot believe my break is over. AHHHHH! I got work done, yes, but it went by so fast. <.sigh>

So my mom woke me up at 9 this morning, hollering from downstairs to turn on NBC. "Breaking" news...Lance is in Moscow doing the medical test necessary for an okay to be in space. Blew me away! I guess he wasn't lying at that first concert when he said they were still in talks. LOL I loved Matt Lauer..."He just went over there? Did he think that no one would notice?" <.g> I guess if I get that "Lance is my Space Cowboy" shirt, it won't be making fun of him now. LOL NOt that the trip is set in stone...the guy said RUssia probably won't take this completely seriously until they have their $20 million, so this will take about a month to finalize. BUt still....he took my advice and did it all quietly this time, with less of the potential public humiliation aspect (Lance is my Space Cowboy <.g>). BUt yeah, they kept updating us on MSNBC today, which I found greatly amusing. Judging by the slight blush on the entertainment reporter's face as he told us it had been Lance's dream since NASA camp or whatever, I think he was a fan. <.giggle> I had heard that the plans were still on last week on the radio, but I don't trust that station. GUess I should. <.g>

TOday I went out to lunch with Josh's SLP, Chris. We had so much fun! I encouraged her to inquire at my clinic if there's room for her to work with me at the summer camp. Those who read last summer remember my trials with Kim, and Janie won't be back, so I need an ally. LOL PLus, it would just be fun. I like her a lot. We both love to read, and have similar movie tastes, and love HP, and adore Josh. <.g>

So, yeah, we went to the Greek restaurant in LaGrange. And the guy behind the counter was SO CUTE. And he kept finding reasons to come over to our table ("Did I give you a number? let me go get you one." "DO you want some bread? I'll have the guy [who was walking right behind him] to get you some." "Your bag is over there. It'll be by me when you're ready." "DOn't forget your bag is over by me when you're done."), and he had this totally awesome smile every time. Of course, I don't discover him until my last day! Hopefully he normally works the noon shift and I can eat lunch there every day this summer. <.g> It's a block away from the clinic.

Thanks to Glace's link to Pop Gurl's review of the Celebrity tour based on Lance (Which is hysterical and must be read by everyone), I have a new favorite site and plan to spend my evening reading their articles. LOL I heart those writers...and like I told Krissy, some of them sounded just like me in their happy obsessiveness. LOL I need friends like them. <.g>

March 19, 2002


Kinda bored here. Watching Cruel Intentions, which I love, and watching some IL primary returns. I love returns. I'm a geek. <.g> I did a lot of work today with my MI stuff...I scored 6 today, I think. So YAY! That's exciting. Other than that, boring day. Hung out with mom and Josh, did work. Blah.

Check out the new quote on my sidebar, courtesy Alicia. <.g> He's so adorable. I wonder if that's really what he meant. LOL

(requisite Josh story)
Josh plays Family Feud on the computer, and it's a hard game and he usually needs help. WHen faced with a question he doesn't know, he uses his old stand-by answers of "MOM" and "ELMO." Every time. He has a new one now. "NSYNC." <.g> Yes, the puppies have been elevated, in Josh's mind, to the status of mom and Elmo. There is no higher praise. <.giggle> My cutie pie.

Back to my movie, I guess. : )

March 15, 2002

cool news

Found two items of news that I find awesome.

1. Everyone should watch Becker on Monday...they're doing an episode about a guy with ALS (Lou Gehrig's) going to see Becker, who helps get him an AAC device. It's on CBS, I'm not sure what time, though. I've never seen the show, but I'm interested in seeing how they handle it. The EP's father has ALS and is at the point where he's unable to speak, so I'm pretty sure it will be done well.

2. The Air Angels, in conjunction with the W.S. Fire Department will be using the south end McClure athletic field tomorrow. This is where I went to school, where Josh would be attending if he wasn't homeschooled, and is about 3 blocks away from my house. We're gonna take Josh. <.g>

Fun, huh? Dad left about half an hour ago, so I have about 2 hours or so. I wonder what I'm forgetting to do or pack. LOL


I'm so excited!! I got my first quiz back in 376 today....and I got an A!!!! Only one wrong. I was so proud of myself. Then, I checked my grade on Monday's know, the one I didn't study for until the day of? I got an A, baby! I think these are my first As in my major. LOL I'm thrilled.

I've been making CDs like a mad woman. LOL I'm on the third one now...I'm gonna miss my MP3s, man. <.g> The first one is just a fun has a lot of Britney, STP, Smashing Pumpkins, some nsync solo work, Joe Scruggs,'s pretty eclectic. LOL Next was Pop music, which has BSB, and nsync and Britney and Ricky Martin and stuff like that. Now this last one is my Happy mix...nsync, disco and oldies are making a high showing. LOL But now that I have all these songs on disc, I really should force myself to delete even just some of them!

Dad's coming between 4 and 5, and I have to finish this CD and pack up laundry. Given that he's bringing me stuff to pack it *into, however, this is mostly waiting until he's here. LOL So I should have time to do everything.

Lady K

For Krissy, I shall update in the middle of the night so she has something to read. LOL Of course, I don't really have anything to say, but when has that stopped me?

In nsync news, I saw that Justin shaved his head again. What, does one of them have to be bald at any given time? LOL Not that I mind...he was bald when I first became a fan and I think it's a hell of a lot better than the fro. But I was kinda getting attached to the curls. <.g> Oh, well.

Only one more class until spring break! Wheee! Tomorrow I have to pack, as dad is coming to get me around 4 or 5. It shouldn't be an overly big deal, though. All I'm really bringing home, outside of music and books and schoolwork, is laundry so I can bring back springier clothes so we get a resurgence of wintery weather. LOL

Dude, why on EARTH am I awake still? LOL I'm so tired, but I want to be doing something. So I added to my sidebar...with that first Chris quote, I'm gonna be getting a LOT of interesting hits. LOL But I so adore that entire story, very much so that line, and the whole thing makes me giggle. So there it is.

I'm taping Buffy at 6am It's the last finale, where she dies..I meant to tape it today when it aired, but I totally forgot until my writing professor was comparing this one story to SMG and Buffy. I was like, "Fuck!" <.g> Oh, well. It was kinda cool to see all of last season...last time it all aired, it only went just past Fool For Love, I think. So it's all fun.

Okay, I think it's time to go to sleep now. LOL Kate's playing Sims with JC and Justin and keeps telling me all the cute stuff they do, which is fun and funny, but I'm dropping and have class at 10. Ick. <.g> But I'm getting my quiz back, and I have high hopes for a decent grade, which is exciting.

March 14, 2002


This has been a fairly productive morning, despite not going to class. LOL I made my mom a CD (which I absolutely LOVE. We have very similar tastes in music. LOL Of the 17 songs on there, I had 9 already downloaded, and of the remaining 8, I saved 4 of them because I love them so much <.g>), finished putting together my MI test (e-mail me if you want to participate...once I get it scanned in this weekend, I can e-mail it to people. It's not scary, it helps me out, and you'll learn something about yourself. <.g> If you want, I can even make little graphics for websites to proclaim your intelligence. LOL), gave the test to Kate so I can honestly say I've started the project, vacuumed and cleaned my room up, wrote my case history for 386, and made a to-do list for tomorrow so I'm ready to leave at 5 when Daddy comes. See, lots done! : )

My grandfather is starting chemo/radiation today. When he was diagnosed, he stated emphatically that he didn't want c/r or extraordinary measures taken to prolong his life. Then he got the j-tube and stuff. And now this. And I'm very glad that he's fighting with everything he has. I can't wait to see him over break. As long as I'm teaching him and Grammy how to use the internet, I might as well introduce them to some nsync stuff. <.giggle> No slash, of course, which rules out 98% of the sites I hit, so I think I'll just teach them how to download MP3s and stuff. LOL

Now if you're observant, you saw that I have a little link called "selling" up in the top left corner of my page, and have for several weeks. I made little nsync t-shirt designs awhile back (read the disclaimer on the page, please <.g>), and I had a really really cute idea for a GSF shirt yesterday. So now I'm off to try and teach myself how to draw puppy paw prints. <.giggle> Wish me luck.

March 12, 2002

spring break plans

I've gotten almost nothing done this morning. LOL I typed up my research project questions, got them all organized, and that's about it. Ooops! I did come up with some spring break plans, though. Nothing grand, but I'll have fun. LOL There had been a brief possibility that Kate, Aarti and I could drive to Texas for an nsync concert, stay with my Jennie-girl and drag her to the concert with us, but that went poof when we didn't have a way to drive to Texas. <.g> Ah, well. So I've still never gone any place for break, but there's always next year. So instead, I shall visit the kindergarten, get my grandparents online, hang out with mom and Josh reading Bunnicula and eating tuna subs from the deli, and go see Sleeping Beauty at the IMAX theater. And maybe ET. <.g> Plus studying for Kuehn's exam, writing a story, and getting people to take my research questions. So it'll be a busy week. : ) I can't believe it's so soon, though!

Today, though, I really need to read stories for class today. Of course, I wasn't there on Thursday so I don't have the new crop of stories, but we're so behind I bet we don't get to those until next class, anyway. LOL So I better stop reading nsync stories and read these. <.g>

March 10, 2002

I'm baa-ack

I'm back from Wisconsin! We really had an awesome time. Mucho fun. <.g> This is the part where I describe what we did (fog, blizzards and swimming are the tip of the iceberg), so read at your own risk. LOL

We drove up Friday morning, making a pit stop at an A&W just past the WI border. Yes, bad Catholics that we are, we all had hotdogs to go with our rootbeer. So then we're driving, and driving, and the overcast skies start lowering and lowering until the fog pretty much killed all potential for seeing, well, anything. LOL At one point, dad and I were surprised to see cars turning, because we couldn't see the bend in the road 10 feet ahead of us. Quite the adventure, let me tell you! So we get to the hotel an hour early, and they let us check in. We are quite literally in the farthest room on the first floor from the pool. We have to walk about a block through a maze of hallways and grand ballrooms to get there. Well, Josh is still recovering from last summer's surgery, plus his other knee is not so great, and so he can only walk 600 feet. This was farther. So we got to switch into a different room, two doors down from the pool. We stuck Josh onto one of those luggage carts and pulled him to the room. LOL The room was smaller than the first one, but the location was so perfect.

So, we took Josh swimming, and then back to the room. He watched videos, then Cadet Kelly (I was NOT impressed...Hilary Duff did a good job, but the writing was beneath what I've come to expect from Disney), and then mom and I got Harry Potter off the pay per view!!! We were really excited, and were up until midnight watching it. We were both exhausted, but somehow managed to stay up. (Okay, I think I slept through the entire climax scene with the Stone, but I was up in time to se R&H huddling on the balcony, and isn't that what counts? <.g>)

During the night, there was this HUGE storm. I mean, really really huge. I was facing away from the window, had my sleep mask on, and I could still see the lightening as clear as if I was standing right at the window. Poor mom was freaking out. Ick. So we got up a few hours later, on not much sleep, and headed down to the pool. While we were there, the snow started. The winds were whipping around, making the snow actually go horizontal. Eeek! LOL it slowed down after awhile, though, and we left at 11 to rent a wheelchair. (God bless the WI tourist board, BTW, for having such a wonderful service at such a low cost...only $10 a day!!) We got to the downtown area around 12 to hit a few stores. We ended up at 2. When we left at 11, the temp was 42. When we got out of the car at 12, it was 22. Windchill was below 0. We felt it. LOL We hit the candy store, then drove to the candle store, and by the time we got to the restuarant for lunch, we could barely move against the wind. We got back to the hotel around 2, went swimming, and watched the snow fly horizontally again. <.g>

At 5, we headed to the conference room for the RTS stuff. This was the low point of the weekend. It was just so stupid and boring and unorganized. They stuck all the kids in front of the TV and played Disney videos. Yes, hello, let's take our kids who thrive on structure and just stick them in front of a TV all night. Wonderful. And it's just so hard to see parents who do so little for their children. One girl there is 18 and has NO way of communication other than a holler for her mother. I don't understand that. Josh isn't the oldest of the kids, but he's gone so far past everyone else. It's been a lot of hard work and fighting and struggling, but it's so worth it. It's sad to see that not everyone fights so hard and are so surprised to see a kid who spells out his communication and lets people know what he wants. It's great to see so many kids with RTS around, but there's no one who can offer advice or ideas there...they have none.

So that sucked. But hey, the room was right near the bar! LOL I had about 2 apricot stone sours, and a tequila sunrise. I liked. <.g> Then we went back to the room and rented Ocean's Eleven, which mom and I just loved.

We got an early start this morning, leaving around 9, and stopped at the A&W again. (I forgot to mention...I had my very first cheese curds this weekend. LOL They were so yummy!) Then we drove to Border's, avoiding the extremely terrifying and elevated highway in Milwaukee that still gives me nightmares. I had the radio on most of the drive, listening to top 20 songs of the week, so I got to hear Girlfriend, which was fun. <.g> At Border's, I got Making the Tour (half-off), and The Winter Album, which is fun. JC singing lead on I Drive Myself Crazy is just so odd to me, and there was another song I didn't know, either. So that was cool.

So, did I get any work done this weekend? Not so much. LOL I did one day book entry (I wrote a 3 page little story, taking Rupert Holmes' idea of Sam Dane, Private Eye as a 1940's detective story updating of Hamlet and writing a scene, based on the prompt of a disater scene in a restaurant <.g>), and started my application for Camp Chatterbox. (Must mail that tomorrow.) I barely looked at my notes for my exam tomorrow, and don't foresee myself doing that tonight. Oh, but I had an idea for my last story for class...combining elements from hotel stays that I've experienced and turning it into an XFilesian mystery. <.g> The elements would be: lights flickering, ghost woman in hallway carrying a baby, disappearing into fog, rose colored room, doors opening and closing themselves, a voice crying "Help me!", and a parking lot full of cars but no one seen in the hotel itself. LOL It would be a young woman going to her friend's wedding at a hotel, and all these bizarre things keep happening. <.g> I think it could be fun.

So, this was my weekend. It was a lot of fun...we laughed a lot, we played alot, and we froze a lot. <.g> I read all my blogs before I started this post, and i see many many quizlets to be taken. Expect results shortly. <.g>

March 06, 2002

doing nothing?

I've been doing a lot today, but I got almost nothing done. LOL That's how it feels, anyway! I went to class, called my grandfather for his birthday, went to another class, got a milkshake with Kate and Aarti, packed for my weekend at the Dells, organized what I have to do tomorrow, made copies for next week's project for me and Jill, watched West Wing, and made a CD. So I guess when I say I got nothing done, I mean I got nothing school-related done. <.g> Oh, well. Tomorrow I have to do at least 10 questions on my review sheet for 386, and straighten up my room so I don't get all claustrophobic when I come back on Sunday. LOL Over the weekend, I'm going to do at least two day book entries, review some 386, start my case study, and yes Kate, I'm bringing both Lance stories with. <.g> Let's hope neither of my parents need to go into my bag to borrow anything. LOL I figure that I always get stuck in the corner during meeting times anyway, plus mom and dad meet with the other adults after Josh goes to bed. Babysitting is prime getting me-stuff done time. <.g>

Oh, big news!! I'm not alone on s-d anymore!! Kate has gotten her journal moved over here. Thanks for all your help, Lady K. : ) It turned out marvelously.

Meanwhile, though, I need to call tonight over and go to sleep. Tomorrow morning, as usual, I will bug my friends as I answer my lecture linkage, and it takes energy to do that. <.g>

Fun fact: According to Oxygen right now, Americans have sex an average of 124 times a year, which is more than any other country. Each person also has an average of 14.3 partners. I really need to catch up. <.g>

March 05, 2002

schedule part 2

Well, I stayed ahead of schedule until noon, when it all fell apart. LOL One of my day book entries is to write a fanfic, so I started looking for one of mine to copy. LOL I came up on a scene from For All Time, but it it takes so long to write out by hand! LOL I ended up only doing about 3/4 of the was a workable stopping space. <.g> (I did the scene where Maple and Scott realize they're in 2001.) But yeah, that took until well after 12, when I was supposed to start working on 386. But I figured I'll just postpone 386 until tonight and do my second day book entry, which is constructing a life about someone who placed a personals ad. <.g> Should be interesting, I guess.

At some point, I also have to start working on my MI paper. But something tells me that I won't really get that done yet. The rough draft is due next Thursday, but it's only peer review, not handing it in. So I'm sure to do a few pages next Wednesday. LOL I'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed with my papers...I don't have many. I have 2, I think. This and 376. So I really shouldn't be freaking out...nothing is due until late April and May. But still I feel the need to get started, and I feel like I don't have enough time to do it all. Someone remind me to relax? <.g>


Last night, I set a schedule for myself today. It started with 7:20 - WAKE UP. <.g> I figured that was an important first step. But the really important thing here is that it's 9:49, and I'm actually running 11 minutes ahead of time. I'm quite pleased here. LOL

Meanwhile, I'm really missing my mail...YG is apparently still down. I got one g-w mail this morning, and one Giles mail, but that's it. Extremely annoying.

What's left on my list:
write up a reflection on my "conversation" with Kristine
write at least 2 Daybook entries
start MI paper
start 386 review sheet (It's always exciting to look at a midterm review sheet and already know more than 50% of the things, but that other 50% still needs to be learned. <.g>)
Buy stamps
Mail things

This is doable, right? <.g> I've got four hours. Ready, set, GO!

March 03, 2002

fun day!

I've done good today. <.g> David installed my drive, it works beautifully, and I already made my first CD. <.g> Of course, I did run into a few snags with some of my file formats, and in that process forgot to add a song that I really wanted to have, but it's done! And it has the Buffy musical on it. LOL Now to try and make a label and stuff for it. ::nods:: Should be fun.

Also, the honey mustard chicken came out really yummy. And there was enough of the sauce to have it work nicely as a dip, too. <.g> So I actually successfully made dinner for myself. And touched raw meat. Believe me when I say this is an accomplishment. LOL

So, yes, feeling good about today. <.g> oh!!! I didn't forget the song I wanted after all! WHOOOO! <.giggle> See below for my tracks, if you're so interested. : )

Continue reading "fun day!" »

weekend update

So I did do some more baking last night. LOL I made these muffin things called Queijadas. It was so easy! Eggs, sugar, flour, butter, milk and vanilla in a blender and then baked for 45 minutes. I really like them....can't wait to make them again. LOL

Then, Aarti and I went to see 40 Days and 40 Nights with Kate, Jess, and Meghan. It was a really cute movie. Certain parts had me laughing hysterically. <.g> It was kinda graphic, I suppose...I've never seen so many naked women on the big screen before. LOL Plus, towards the end of the 40 days, Matt was sporting a full erection in many, many scenes. <.g> It was all cute, though. I'm glad I went to go see it. Aarti and I had planned to sneak into Crossroads, too, but the timing just didn't work out. <.g>

Today, my cousin is coming over to install my rewritable CD drive! I'm so excited. He said between 2 and 3, so he'll probably be here around 4. LOL I had been going to ask him to see if he could make my scanner scan, but in his last e-mail, he was like, "You just want me to install this thing, right?" leading me to believe that he wants to get in and out of here. LOL We'll see, I guess. His payment is me making him dinner (I think I'm getting the better end of the deal here <.g>), so I found a recipe for honet mustard chicken that looks easy, and is something I really want to try. LOL So that should be fun.

Well, now I've got between 3 and 5 hours until David gets here, so I have to find some things to occupy my time. LOL Maybe I'll paint my nails like I meant to last night. Or work on my stories. Or actually get schoolwork done. <.giggle> I like having this free time thing. It works for me.

March 02, 2002

lovely day

The weather may be wet and soggy, but I'm moving past that. <.g> I've had a lovely day so far, for the most part. I woke up at 8:30, and read in bed for awhile. Then I watched a Sidney Portier movie on TCM, and Xena, and some of Who Framed Roger Rabbit. During the last movie, I decided to go downstairs and do some baking, so I made some peanut butter cookies from my WW2 recipe book. I think they came out okay...a little flat tasting, maybe, but not bad. I wanna make some meringue now, but on searches for recipes, I keep finding that you shouldn't bake them on a rainy day, because of the moisture. <.pout> No fair. Maybe I'll find another recipe and make something else. I don't know why I have this compulsion to be cooking or baking, but I'm taking advantage of it while it lasts. LOL

Okay, meant to post this, like, an hour ago. LOL Whoops.

February 28, 2002

one of those days

One of those days when everything seems wrong. ::shakes head:: I guess not wrong, exactly, but it was still one of those days. <.g> I was walking to class, crossing the gas station, started slipping on some ice. Regained my balance a few times, then thought, "Oh, this isn't going to be good." Next thing I know, splat on the ground, mostly on my left wrist. Cursing, I get up and cross the street. Step into the parking lot, walk between two cars, and go splat onto my left wrist. Curse some more, clutch the throbbing wrist, get about ten more feet and then...well, you get the point. I would have headed back, figuring the gods were telling me I shouldn't be out, but I also figured I'd probably get killed on the same patches of ice. <.g> So I kept on going. Class wasn't bad, I guess, but boring and my wrist hurt. Then came writing class, and while that too wasn't bad, he kept calling on me and I had nothing really to say. And my story is most likely going first on Tuesday, and I'm afraid that I called my character by the wrong name at one point, and I'm too afraid to actually go back and look to see if I'm right. LOL And then I kept slipping while on my way back, because the walkway in front of our doors is absolutely treacherous.

So now I'm sleepy, headachy, my wrist feels fine some of the time and not fine the rest of it, I've got a quiz tomorrow in 376, and appointments with my advisor and dean. NOT FUN. But next week is a pretty light week, only one thing due. (Krissy, I need to interview you this weekend, okay? : )) But first I have to get through tomorrow. I studied last night a little, and God knows I studied this exact material for the exam last week, but she said this would be harder than the ones last semester and I don't know how awake I can be to study tonight. But I guess my real problems with the quizzes last sem were the halves with the dead body and muscles and stuff, so this is probably automatically easier in that regards. Still, I'm nervous.

February 27, 2002

cold, cold, cold

Goodness, it's cold. LOL I've been so spoiled this winter! I can handle the 15 degrees it is outside, but the -5 windchill gets me. <.g> Fully unbearable. But hey, only a little bit of hair froze today! I had the rest tucked up under my hat. <.g>

EdPsych was super fun, as always. We were talking about memory, and each of the TAs was a type of memory/thought process. Eric was Sensory Perception Man....complete with theme song! LOL It was *hysterical. All super hero/Broadwayish sounding. <.giggle> No one else was that fun. But then we were talking about long term memory. Dr. Zola was like, "sing with me!" And he started out, "588" and 95% of the class chorused, "2300, Empire!" Which is the jingle to a Chicago area carpet company. <.giggle> There were a handful of people looking around at us like we were all insane. LOL Then he was reciting a classic poem, and he wanted us to name the poet..."Look into my eyes - you will see what you mean to me. Search your heart - search your soul, and when you find me there you'll search no more." <.g> Only one person knew it was Mutt Lange who wrote it, everyone else thought of Bryan Adams or pictured Kevin Costner. LOL Pretty fun.

So tonight, I have to read/comment on the stories for tomorrow, start studying for 376 quiz, and begin my outline for EdPsych tomorrow. Them's my goals. <.g>

February 26, 2002

slow day

I'm having such a lazy day. LOL I slept until 9:30, sat down at my computer, Miggie IMed me, and I barely moved since. LOL I took a shower at 11:45, had breakfast at 12:45, and got almost NOTHING done. LOL When I finish this entry, I'll call and make my appts with Kathi and Kristi about my exam, and print out my story for tonight. That will be the extent of my getting things done. LOL

I did spend a lot more time with my story, though. I finally to close the file because I was rereading it so much that I now dislike it entirely. LOL I figure nothing I do now will help it, so I'll just call it done. We'll see how it goes over.

I love looking out my window and seeing all the white! It's so pretty. I wish I didn't have to go out in it. LOL

Miggie sent me to The Secret Diaries of LOTR. I was cracking up!! So funny. Then they had t-shirts made at cafe-press for different characters and diaries and stuff. I want this one...Still the prettiest. LOL! I LOVE the cartoon on the back!! And, yeah, I am completely in love with Orlando Bloom. <.g> He's a skinny little twit, but totally adorable and hot and loves to smooch his costars. He's perfect. <.g>

Okay, I better get moving now. LOL

February 25, 2002

cast list

I'm feeling productive tonight, I guess. LOL I finished my story (WHHHHHEEEEEE!!!!!! I actually even like it, even though it's onto page five now), and then made a cast list for the blog. LOL I've been wanting to for awhile, and so I just threw one together in the last half hour or so. It's up on the top left sidebar, so if you're ever curious about half the people I reference here, you might find answers there. And if I talk about someone that is leaving you clueless, let me know so I can add them to the list. <.g>

Now time for bed. 'Cause I have a few things to do tomorrow morning, and I want to give myself time to do them. I am completely terrified about getting my exam back in 376 tomorrow...I so wanted to do well, and right now, I don't think I did. But I refuse to drop the damn's a matter of pride. No matter how I did, I will do better next time. That's my promise to myself.

February 24, 2002


Whooo, google is finding me here now! And it has begun already...someone found me searching for "Lance and Joey pictures." LOL Also, oddly, for "wet banana" and "GWTW facts." <.g> I love seeing how people find me. nsync searches had just begun to find me over at tripod, so this really took a far shorter amount of time. Which could be because I actually did link some horribly adorable JoLa pics. LOL

Okay, back to my story.

February 20, 2002

what have I done?

This has been a pretty productive unproductive night. Or is that an unproductive productive night? I can't tell. I didn't want to study, so I pulled out my reading for EdPsych tomorrow and realized, half way into reading about IDEA, that I was reading about IDEA, and oh shit, I have to present on IDEA when we read about it. <.g> So I wrote down a page of stuff to talk about tomorrow. Then I organized all my papers for that class into a folder, because I've been stuffing everything into my notebook, and my notebook was now twice the size it should be. Then I pulled out my linkage assignment for that class with the intent of doing it, but didn't. I just don't know what to write...I don't know what biases I have that could impact my teaching style. There are things I don't *know about, like I don't know much about other cultures and religions, but if I was in a classroom and saw that I had kids from other cultures and stuff, I would go out and learn. That's not really a bias, though. I'm not opposed to learning about new things and integrating them into the classroom, and heaven knows that I have no problems about inclusion. LOL So I don't know what to say for that. And the other question is about how cultures and biases affected my own education, and again, I just don't have a clue how to answer. He talked about how he had all males for math and science and all females for English classes, and that affected students based on gender roles. Well, all but 2 of my science teachers have been female, I never had a male math teacher, I had more female gym teachers than male, and my language teachers were fairly equal. So I don't think gender roles really affected me, and I'm not sure what else there is. Religion, maybe, but half the time I was in Catholic school, and so we were all kinda the same religion. <.g> The rest of the time, gosh, I don't even think I ever considered it. Even in public school, I was in WS, and it was all pretty much Catholic and Protestant. Not much variability...I got that online and in my family. (Pretty much each branch of my family is a different religion, from mormom to jewish to wicca.)

Okay, now I'm just babbling. LOL Sorry 'bout that. <.giggle> What on earth was I talking about in the first place? Oh, so I did most of my EdPsych stuff. Then I made an error page for's kinda big, but it's cute. You can check it out by just randomly going to a page that doesn't exist here. And since I pretty much just have this page up, odds are you'll stumble on it by adding anything, like your name.html or something. LOL And then I had no choice but to start reviewing, and it's not going well. I just can't keep on task. Witness the above RAMBLE of a post! LOL Oh, but I found that story I was looking was on my clipboard with my 385 review sheets. <.giggle> I'd pull it out and work on it, but I don't think I'd get much done. I'm too scattered. And I need to study. But it's all going *whoosh* over my head. Or through my head, maybe. Not sticking. A lot of this is stuff we learned in Dr. W's class freshman year (or was it sophomore?), so I kinda know it, but I would like a better grasp of it, and it's not happening so far. But it's MC, only 40 questions, and I did go to class. And read the book. And did the study guide, and review game thingie. And the project. So some things had to have stuck, right? Enough that I'd get it if I saw it? This is what I'm hoping.

AUGH! I'm hyper and alone and rambly and I have NO clue what I'm saying, but I want to be doing something, and I don't consider studying to be something right now. But I don't know what is. But hey, at least I'm not tired still. So that's a plus. I think. At least if I was tired, I could do something, go to sleep.

Okay, this post has lost all redeeming value. I apologize for it. <.giggle> Time to go away now. (And geez, just imagine if I'd opted for caffeine and not water to drink tonight. Now that would have been scary.)

February 19, 2002


If you were two pages of a funny, sweet, fluffy Valentine's story, where would you be? <.g> I'm getting so stressy, I thought working on my fluffy story would help, but I can't find it! LOL It has to be around somewhere, though.

I'm just a mess today. I'm really tense, which is giving me a bad headache, I'm really sleepy, which is giving me a bad headache, and I'm stressed, which isn't helping the headache. <.g> I've taken lots of Tylenol and tried to relax a little, but nothing is helping. Maybe I'll leave a little early for class today and walk slowly, which would normally help relax me a bit, but it's still pouring out, so that might be counterproductive. LOL I could seriously go to bed now and not wake up until my test tomorrow. Would that I could. <.g>

February 18, 2002

long day

I had a long day, but it wasn't so bad. My parents picked me up at 10, and we went shopping (I got cute St. Paddy's Day stickies) and out to lunch. So it was nice spending time with them again. : ) I like when they come down to's always fun. Then they dropped me off at 376 on their way home. We reviewed the entire class period! Last sem, it was all, "I'm not going to explain this again, you should know it." This time, it was, "Okay, sure we can go over that" with a smile. <.g> Not that he explained everything really well, but he made an effort! I was mildly panicked that every other question, I had no clue what people were asking, but when I saw graphs and stuff, I had a fairly good idea of what was going on. So hopefully I'll do okay with multiple choice. Then Jill and I went to the union between classes, and ran into my cousin David, who sat with us. Aunt Margaret had told mom that he was having problems with some classes, and I found out WHY when he told me he didn't go to his 1 and 3 classes on Mondays. I wanted to smack him upside the head, but he'll figure out eventually that going to class is good. <.g>

Oh, but then we were in was funny. We were talking about assessing narrative styles with kids, and how you ask about their favorite movie or TV show, or what they saw that weekend, and so she asked if anyone had gone to the movies this weekend. One girl raised her hand, and she asked her what movie she saw. The girl hesitated and said, "Well, um, I don't really want to say." The whole class started laughing and half of us called out, "Crossroads!" Which is indeed what she had seen. LOL But she got out of explaining the plot and stuff. <.g> It was just so cute...we all knew *exactly what she had seen. LOL And I actually want to see it, too--Aarti and I tried this weekend, but couldn't get a car. LOL So we're gonna try Friday night. I'm feeling pretty pro-Britney after Ash's experience with her.

Now I have to study again, but I so don't want to. I'm exhausted and sick of the entire class. But I don't know that I can afford to take tonight off, even if I do study tomorrow, since no class until 3. Maybe it'll help my mental health, though. I can finish my stories for tomorrow's class and maybe get some reading done, then I just have 376 tomorrow. Worth a shot.

February 16, 2002

weekend plans

Why does it seem that whenever I make concrete studying plans, something comes to blow them out of the water? LOL I did do a LOT of studying last night for artic/phon...I watched Sound of Music, too, and totally drooled over Christopher Plummer, who I totally want. LOL So I did a lot last night, which means that the rest of it can mostly wait until the night before the test. <.g> So I was going to spend all weekend with 376. But mom called...Dad has Monday off, and mom and Josh are just going INSANE together. Total winter doldrums rut. So dad made a reservation at the Holiday Inn down here for Sunday night. So they're driving down tomorrow, gonna take me out to lunch and shopping, and back to the hotel if I so desire, for swimming and fun. I'm not sure what I'll do. I guess it depends on how much studying I get done today and tomorrow morning. Because I do have all of Monday and Tuesday mornings to study, as well, and Monday and Tuesday nights, and a few last minute hours on Wednesday, plus I can always bring my notes with me anywhere.

It will be fun to see them, though. : ) I've been wanting to get out of the apartment, too, so it'll be a nice change.

February 15, 2002

princess margaret

Wow, Princess Margaret died! I had no'd have thought I'd have read something before the funeral. AOL didn't say what from...she was only 71, that's not too old, really. Especially since her mother is 101, you know? <.g> You'd think she would have a longevity factor. But I think that's sad. : ( I first read about her in the Molly books, and then later in other WW2 things...she and then-Princess Elizabeth were pretty well-loved in America during the war. All the girls wanted to be like the young, pretty princesses and stuff. What's really amazing is that her father was buried 50 years ago tomorrow...very close dates.


Wow, scientists have actually cloned a cat! I don't know how I feel about that. There are so many dogs and cats that no one can we add more? Plus, I mean, God, I loved Liesl and I miss her so much, but I would be so entirely freaked out to have a Liesl CLONE running around my house. That seems wrong to's not her, but it is, and yeah. Disturbing. Too X-Files, without the Mulder. But I saw on the news last summer that they were working on cloning cats that would be hypo-allergenic. And I went "WHEEEEEE!" Because I love cats...I love cuddling them, playing with them, watching them, everything, and I am so highly allergic to them. So it would be wonderful to have a cat I wasn't allergic to, but at the same time, I don't know how comfortable I would be having a cloned kitty. It's amazing that it's possible to have this going on, though, that this can actually be a real debate.

February 14, 2002

happy valentine's day!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! Are you all appropriately decked out in red, pink, and white? LOL I got my Disney Kiss sweatshirt on...9 shots of different Disney characters smooching. It's comfy and cute. <.g>

I've been told that I neglected the most important fandom yesterday, so here we go with nsync. Which is HARD, because even just going by fic characters, everyone writes them different. LOL Lance can be sweet and shy, or he can be a smug bastard. Joey can be a cuddly teddy bear or a womanizing user. So this is a mix of real-life image and fic characteristics.

1. Sexy one: Right off the bat, hard one! They all have their moments. (Yes, even Lance. You should SEE my wallpaper....) But I guess most often it's JC or Justin. But JC with long hair, and Justin with no hair, when he's not trying to be sexy. LOL
2. The Knight: Lance, I think. I just don't believe that the image he presents is really who he is.
3. Who I'd end up with: This is really hard. LOL Obviously I want to say Lance. But I don't know if that's true. <.g> Possibly JC, maybe Joey. Both are often sweet and romantic, but also kinda take-chargey. In a good, not controlling way. LOL

Do you know how odd it is to do that with real people, even if trying to use their fic counterparts? LOL Oh, well, it's done. Now it's your turn!

I spent seriously pretty much the entire night in Kate's room last night, working on a new story. Is it a story I can turn in On February 26? Of course not. Well, not without changing some names and genders. ; ) But it's just a fluffy Valentine's Day fic, really, and I don't know how well that would go over. <.sigh> I really do need a story idea, stat. Big ugh!

Okay, gonna work more on my happy schmoopy story and listen to my schmoopy music. nsync is on now. LOL

February 13, 2002

lots o' things

What a day, what a day. I've been doing a lot of research on my grandfather's options for the last two days, which is hard, because the esophageal cancer returned and there are no cures for this. Just things to make him more comfortable. And that makes me sad. So I have this mix of happy songs that I was playing at full volume and singing along with while I did all this depressing searching, which Aarti walked in on. Whoops. <.g> But yeah, it's a sad sad thing.

They did drive out to our house this afternoon, though, to read all the info I found. It was pretty overwhelming and stuff. Mom made him some mac and cheese, though...he couldn't swallow, but he could swallow and taste and spit out. Which was a little distressing for him, because he wanted to swallow and eat, but he did like this little bit. And then mom pulled out the wine for her and grammy, and he was like, "You know, I was watching Frasier and he and Niles do this wine tasting thing..." So he wine tasted. <.g> With this, like, HUGE grin on his face, apparently. Like he was doing something he shouldn't, and loving every minute. LOL I can totally see that. <.giggle>

Mom's having more problems with Daddy...he's just so closed minded and sees everything in black and white, and neither of us do. So I somehow got turned into a marriage counselor. <.g> I guess I don't mind so much, though. I know it's hard for her. They agree on so much, they're best friends, but they have such fundamental differences that it's hard to get past sometimes. It always comes back, and it can get quite bad. So it's just sucky.

Today's Ash Wednesday for all the Catholics out there. I kept seeing people walking around with ashes on their forehead, and I honestly considered going to the 5pm mass to get mine. I still might go to the 10pm with Meg. But I don't know. I like the comfort of the routine...I haven't been to mass since I left Naz sophomore year, but I bet I can still sing the hymns and do the speaking parts, and everything. So there's that, but on the other hand, I disagree so strongly with much of what the Catholic church rests its foundations, divorce, women's roles in the church, abortion, same sex love....these are very big things to disagree with your church on. LOL So it's comfortable on one hand because it's what I grew up with, and uncomfortable on the other because I don't believe all of it. So I'm not sure what I'm doing yet. And even if I don't go tonight to get my ashes, doesn't mean I can't go in the future.

Guess I should get studying. <.sigh> I'm learning things, I swear I know way more than I did a week ago, but I just plain do not know what to study. I feel like whatever I learn and prepare is exactly what he won't test me on, but I don't know what else to go over! The notes, the book, the course pack. Somehow, he's going to come up with stuff to stump me, and I resent that greatly. <.g> But hey, my discussion class for edpsych is getting pizza for Valentine's Day. That I can get behind. The test is in 12 days for that class, and I'm actually looking forward to it. It's group tests! Wheee! LOL

February 11, 2002

big hug

From Sara comes a really big hug. Guaranteed to make you smile!

February 10, 2002

sidebars and more

I love playing with my sidebars. <.g> Witness new quotes and lyrics, and new blogs that I've found. Lauren came over and we pretty much finished the next two projects for 386, so everything I have left to do is stuff I can do in bed. Yay!! Reading, writing, and tylenol...makes for a good day, stupid rain outside notwithstanding. <.g> While Lauren was here, checking her mail to delay going to her boyfriend's concert, the spirit moved me and I cleaned my room. Then I started doing Valentines. <.g>

On a completely unrelated note....Biz, can I have your address please? <.g>

February 08, 2002


From Carrie and many others:

- hair: nearly shoulder-length, reddish brown with bangs
- height: 5'3"
- weight: more than I'd like
- figure: hourglassy <.g>

(there's a LOT more....)

Continue reading "aam" »

February 05, 2002


Well, I turned my story in. ::bites nails:: Nghi's right, though, this is a pretty merciful class. I hope it continues through Thursday. LOL I'm kinda interested in what my teacher says...he has this tendency to find meaning where the authors walk out, shake their head, and say there was none there. <.g>

Earshot was on FX when I came home, and that was exciting. I'll be getting up at 7 to watch all of it tomorrow. <.g> That was such a great episode...I remember how I got my bootleg copy in May and spent my whole summer after graduation copying it for people, until it aired in August. LOL

I spent my afternoon curled on the couch with blankets, and FINALLY finished my Roanoke book. It was so utterly fascinating. I'm halfway considering a historical fiction short story for my next one. <.g> There's just such drama and romance inherent in that whole story. So who knows. I do have to write one soon, though. Eeeek! I've got almost nothing to do this week, a small project with Lauren this weekend, two tests the week of the 18th, and then an exam and an assignment due on the 25th, the story due on the 26th, and my first 376 quiz on the 1st. So I have a lot to do this week and next to make sure I don't choke on my exams. Worrysome indeed.


I had this sudden burst of something last night around 11:30, and managed to get all of my reading done, that I was going to do this morning! LOL So now it's Tuesday at 10:30 in the morning, and I am fully prepared for every class this week. Which is great, but now what do I do?! LOL

I got my story printed last looks so short! LOL Well, it is, just at 2 pages, but I printed it on both sides of the sheet to save paper, and now I'm just handing in one sheet of paper to each person. And the stories I read for today were like 5-7 pages. Oh, well. I couldn't stretch this to 5-7 pages...the story only encompasses about 10 minutes, if that! This is how the long the story was, and there's not much I can do about that. It just feels a little odd. <.g>

Meanwhile, does anyone have a nailfile I can borrow? LOL


Jane is cynical, intelligent, and talented (she is a budding artist). Like any good artist, Jane constantly explores the passionate and emotional side of the world. She believes paint-by-number kits are inherently evil.

<.g> Cool.

February 04, 2002


Whooooo!!! MA and I played Literati, and I WON!!! 193-185. I am so excited. LOL! Also, I titled and finished my story for tomorrow. There's not one more change I can think of to make. I'm really pretty proud of it, to be honest. Now I'm just interested in finding out what everyone else thinks, rather than terrified. (Although I imagine that terrified will return on Thursday, with a vengeance. LOL)

Okay, now go to Kate's blog and check out the new quote, under the Daria one. <.g> I read that story last night, and was in tears I was laughing so hard. So I sent a number of quotes from the story to Kate, including that one, and we agreed that it had to go on to someone's blog. So her's won. <.g> Just reading that one line gets me laughing all over again. <.giggle>

One comment about Angel before I go....

Continue reading "yay!" »


I made pancakes for breakfast! <.g> Didn't turn out half bad, either, to be honest. Okay, sure, probably could have used a little more time on the griddle. LOL Especially that last bite. Ooops. <.g> But all in all, not bad for my first attempt!

Oooh, know what I get to do now? Put up Valentine's stickies on the windows! Very exciting. And oodles more fun than the chapter for 376 I just finished reading. LOL

February 03, 2002


From Kristine comes Which Candy Heart Are You?

Of course, "Be Mine," is what your candy heart says. Whether you've found your soul mate or not, you've got an old-fashioned sense of how romance should be and can't wait to find your "keeper." Doesn't matter where this year's Valentine's Day cards are going to come from mom, dad or your hotter than hot honey. You feel that February 14th is about falling in love all over again even if your ideal mate is somewhere out there in the future.

You're not bitter when you see cute couples holding hands in the park. You sigh and imagine yourself swinging on the front porch with your sweetie, sipping lemonade and playing with the grandkids. That's what your vision of happiness has in store when it comes to love.

When you think about it, there aren't too many things better than finishing each other's sentences and finding something new in those stories you've heard 450 times already. Here's to friends and lovers forever! And with a statement like "Be Mine", you're primed and ready.

Sounds pretty damn accurate to me.

And then the Ultimate IQ test...

127 is your Ultimate IQ score.
Your Intellectual Type is a Facts Curator. Like Bill Gates, you've fed your brain a unique collection of facts and figures over the years. Words, numbers, you've got it all.

Not bad for taking it right after waking up. LOL And I am totally facts girl. I learn facts even when I don't mean to. <.g> Very fun!

I have to get some reading done for 386 today, and mark up the three stories for Tuesday's class. Then I'll be satisfied. Reading them made me feel better about my writing abilities. LOL One was pretty bad, one was quite good, and one was somewhere in the middle. <.g> So I'm about average. Yay!

February 02, 2002


I am SO tired. I think I might just let Britney on SNL tape and head to bed. I sent Johnny my story, though, and he really thought it was good. That makes me feel better, as he is an English teacher and has published stories as well. <.g>

I got to talk to my grandfather last night...he's back in the hospital. His feeding tube had fallen out, and they replaced it, and it got infected. And now they're researching this surgery to remove the scar tissue off of his esophagus/stomach tube so he can eat again. He can't even swallow right now. So that sounds good. But they keep on planning for things that can't ever really happen. Like moving out of their house and into a condo, coming down to visit me, things like that. So it's sad.

February 01, 2002

Friday Five

Time for the Friday Five!

1. Have you ever had braces? Any other teeth trauma?
Yup, and yup. LOL My one big teeth trauma story leads into the braces. <.g> I was 7 years old, I think. My Aunt Dana had come up to visit with her little girl Tiffany, who was a few months old. It was summer, hot, and we had the Wet Banana up in addition to our pool. That was a yellow plasticy thing that you slide down, and the banana was a sprinkler that kept the yellow wet so you could slide. We didn't have a huge backyard, given that we were in the city, but we were able to stick it in there between the pool and swing set. That day, Jon, David, Erin and Gabija were over, as per usual. We were taking turns on the Wet Banana, going down it and then back up to go to the end of the line. She got in line, and even though she had been sitting by the foot of this thing, apparently didn't notice that we were going back and forth. So she started going down as I was coming up. I saw her quickly approaching, and did the first thing that came to mind...slid off of the plastic to avoid her head. Smart, right? Nope, this was very similar to the Titanic. I probably would have been better off hitting her head on. <.g> Because, genius that I am, I didn't slide towards the grass, I slid into the metal pole of the swing set. Lovely, huh? My adult tooth in the front was just coming in...had it been even a little farther down, I would have lost it. But no, it just tilted about 30 degrees. So my teeth looked like this: /- until I got braces when I was 12. <.g>

2. Ever broken any bones?
Yup! I broke my right wrist in fourth grade. Gym class...our teacher had us running relay races backwards, with our eyes closed. I crashed right into Jamie, and slammed my wrist back. The nurse and everyone just said that it was sprained, so I rested it for a few days, and went back to my regular activities. Inlcuding bowling that Saturday. Yes, I am right handed, and yes, it hurt like hell. <.g> We found out later that week that the growth plate had been broken into 2.

3. Ever had stitches?

Just from when I had my appendix out when I was 7. Oh, and I guess in my mouth from having my wisdom teeth removed. <.g>

4. What are the stories behind some of your [physical] scars?
Well, my appendix. I have a few on my left arm and left wrist from when I've been upset. I have one on my left leg from 7th grade. I was getting ready to go to a dance, and when I stood up from the ottoman, I cut my leg on a nail that was sticking out. I just HAD to go, though, so we bandaged it up and off I went. When I was there, John asked me to dance the next slow dance, which I was SO excited about. But did we dance? Nope, because just before the next slow song, my leg started bleeding and I had to go to the bathroom to try and stop it. <.sigh> So disappointing.

5. How do you plan to spend your weekend?
Well, it seems that I've driving up home with Kate to wait in line to see if there is an April 5 nysnc concert to buy tickets for. <.giggle> After that, I'll be doing some school work, maybe renting Queer as Folk, hopefully installing my cd-drive.

stupid internet

Yay, my internet is back!!! It's been out since last night, which is amazingly frustrating.

I met with my advisor today. She's really nice, and everything is seemingly going to work out fine. My spring semester is basically going to be all electives next year, and my fall will be 13 hours of core classes (since I need to retake 375) and one elective. Then my grade for 375 is going to be averaged and that will be my final grade. She also told me to work with my TA to prepare for tests, because Kuehn will be no help. LOL It all seemed fine when we discussed it. She wants me to check in after we get our first test back to see how I did, and we'll see what happens from there. I could conceivably drop 376 if needed this semester and take it next year. I'm kinda resolving to NOT DO THAT, though. <.g> I don't want to take the easy way out. I'm going to fight for a C in this class if it kills me. But just rehashing last semester and talking worst case scenarios made me pretty damn sad and down, and I was in a bad way the whole walk home.

Then I checked my voice mail and had a call from mom telling me to check my e-mail. I didn't have internet, so I called her. She was with Sue, Josh's PT, and couldn't talk. But made sure to tell me that I should relax, have a bite to eat, and relfect on how lucky my February 1 was. I was like, "Lucky Why is it lucky? Did we get tickets?" She said, "Bye" and hung up. LOL Meanie. So I bounced around, with no one to talk to since I was alone with no internet, and then poor Aarti came home and I bounced around her a lot. <.g> But mom called back and told already paid for the tickets!! They are so ours. And they don't even go onsale until tomorrow morning! We don't know how good they are, although we paid the top price for them, but we're hoping that they're very good. We think they probably will be...when dad's gotten tickets from this guy before, they've been, like, front row. They're probably not going to be THAT good, but it gives us hope for fairly good ones. <.g> So that made me happy.

So now I'm doing a lot better, with nsync on TV and disco on MP3, and things will work out. So I have one really sucky grade on my transcript. I still have an amazing amount of experience that few people have at my age, and that's something a grad school would be lucky to have.

January 31, 2002

What I've done

Okay. Off that list, I have...

*Finished my story (barring edits I plan to do with Johnny and Kate)
*Researched doctors for my grandfather (anyone know anything about the needle knife dilatation procedure?)
*Chosen a topic for my 376 paper (evolution of speech/language, tentatively)

I also checked my bank account balance and found out that Kate's Christmas present was shipped yesterday and should arrive next week. So I'm doing good, I think! Just gotta keep working.

Okay, both the TV Guide and are telling me that SNL should be on right now. So why do I see Ben Stein and not Josh Jackson with nysnc? That's obnoxious as all hell. I guess someone forgot to tell Comedy Central what to air.


Wow, I've gotten a lot done this morning! I did my EdPsych, did half of my writing stuff. Very exciting.

I found this page last has the CUTEST Lance and Joey pictures. Ignore the text, smile at the pictures. LOL Like, it has the sleeping picture I posted last week, but it turns out the one I posted was cut...this one is SO much cuter, with JC in there. <.giggle> And the one of Joey in the red hat leaning on Lance is my wallpaper for startup/shutdown. LOL I love the tickling one, though. Adorable.

To continue my nsync theme, Kate and Aarti read on TRL yesterday about Lance's special PB&J sandwich. So we tried it. LOL Well, part of it. He says peanut butter, jelly, honey, cinnamon, and sugar, and we didn't have honey. So, like Kate said, it was a half-assed Lance Special. <.g> Actually, it was pretty good. I liked what the cinnamon sugar added, although I'm not sure what I'd feel about honey on it. <.g> Really gotta wonder how he came up with something like that. Although I came up with cinnamon and brown sugar on my popcorn this summer, which is pretty insane in and of itself. <.g> He seems to have a lot of odd recipes, though. Like the barbeque cheeseburgers we saw him make on another show. He put BBQ sauce on the patties before grilling them, which kinda sounds good and kinda sounds...interesting. LOL I don't know. Has anyone ever tried that?

Okay, now I have about 25 minutes to find something to eat before class and read this story for class. Sounds fun. LOL

January 29, 2002


I can't shake this feeling that I'm forgetting something. I don't know what! I watched all of QaF (I love that Brian is starting to feel something for Justin!), I have an appointment with Kathi Friday at 11, right after class. I did my reading for EdPsych tomorrow, I did my paragraphs for tonight's class, I might have gotten more than half done with the next story I'm going to turn in, and I wrote my check for my tuition to turn in today. I only have two classes today, and I'm prepared for both. I'm prepared for both of tomorrow's classes. So what on earth am I forgetting?! ARGH! Is this what I get for spending my morning curled up in bed watching the pretty boys? I need a job. I need something to do. LOL Why must every other job I look at involve heavy lifting? I am not a heavy lifter. Ugh.


I got this from a friend of mine. From the limited research I did after reading it, it seems to be true, which I think is cool. : )

Continue reading "Kurt" »

January 28, 2002

child of the 80s

Hee Hee! Okay, I had to post this. It's long, so I stuck it in the More section. I bolded the ones that actually apply to me. LOL Some are rather embarrassing, but what can I say? I was a product of my times. <.g>

You know you grew up in the 1980's if . .

Continue reading "child of the 80s" »

what I've done

So, let's see. I've had a rather productive night. <.g> I watched about 3 hours of Queer as Folk (4 episodes at 45 minutes each), wrote my Faulkner paragraph, typed my story and inflicted it on Kate, and I think that's it. LOL But that just leaves calling Kathi, finishing QaF, and doing my list of words during 385 tomorrow. Sounds pretty manageable to me!

I'm really loving QaF. I adore Justin, I want to hug Brian even when he's a prick, I want Michael to get a clue and stop following Brian around, I want Ted to find someone, and I want Mel to stop being such a bitch. <.g> I think Lindsey is sweet, but Mel has almost NO redeeming qualities that I've found so far. I can't wait to see what happens in the next few episodes tomorrow morning. LOL But for now, sleep! Yay!

class and plans

I have NO idea how I stayed awake through 386 today! LOL I was totally falling asleep. Well, the 6 pages of notes, both sides, and the cramp in my hand might have had something to do with not falling asleep. <.giggle>

So, yay, I went to the video store and rented the first two volumes of QaF to watch!! So, that's 373 minutes (aka 6 hours and 13 minutes) that I have to watch before it's due at 6pm tomorrow. <.g> That was an eeek on my part, but it was silly to only get volume one, which is eps 1-3, since I had already seen 1 of them, and I have so many hours tomorrow morning. So now I have eps 1-8. <.g> I'm excited!

So, this is what I have to do tonight and tomorrow before class:

Call Kathi for an appointment (turns out she's been e-mailing me since December, wanting to make sure I was okay in 375 and then about failing it. Ooops.)
Watch 6 hours and 13 minutes of QaF. LOL
Write a paragraph on how Faulker combined narrative, expository and dialogue to create the first two pages of "Barn Burning."
Type the one page of possible story to inflict on people.
Watch someone and write down a list of action words that shows what they do.

I figure I'll type and watch QaF tonight, and start the Faulkner P. Tomorrow morning I'll call Kathi and finish the Faulkner, and I'll watch Jill or Meg in class tomorrow. I'll return QaF before writing class, and go back on Wednesday to rent volume 3, return that on Friday and rent 4 and 5 to watch on Sunday when we get back from nsync tickets. ::nods:: That's my plan. LOL

Now to type so I can watch the pretty boys. <.g>

January 27, 2002

Rocky Horror character

From Carrie comes:

I'm Janet!

Which Rocky character are you?


I had a lot of fun this weekend! We had temps in the 60s all weekend, so we had windows open and took walks and stuff. Super fun. Mom and I also rented Save the Last Dance, which we both loved. The play, A Murder Is Announced, was fantastic...I got about 3/4 of the way to solving the mystery, story of my life. LOL I had all the pieces put together, and didn't take that one extra step. <.g>

My dad got me the nysnc hotline phone and Buffy S1 on DVD! So exciting. I installed the nsync game, and was having a great deal of fun with it. You can dress the boys, you can make them dance, and I was spending time doing trivia. I didn't know most of it, but I had fun guessing. Like, Lance's favorite sport is baseball. Yay! So's mine. <.g> And Joey would like to go back to the 50s, Lance to the 20s, and JC to the romance era. I thought that was fun. LOL So far, I've gotten two random calls from them...Justin wants me to dance, and Lance thinks I'm special. Such fun. LOL

Not much really happened...Josh woke me up on Saturday. He crawled up me and flopped down. I figured he was going for my mask to make me wake up, but no. How silly of me. He went straight for the watch. LOL He's just the cutest. On the train home (with David), I started to write a slightly disturbing story. I think it's JC or Lance, but I never say and I'm not going to. So I might turn this one in next. I'll show it to other people and see what they think. If you want to volunteer, let me know. LOL

January 25, 2002

lucky bamboo

I think I killed my lucky bamboo shoot. The stem is all yellow, and stuff is growing on it. It was doing fine and great until I went home for break and it lived with mom's dying one. <.g> Am I doomed to bad karmicness now? I can't find any info on killing it, but I assume it's not a GOOD thing. LOL Does anyone know, though?

I'm all ready to go home, now waiting to watch Even Stevens, Influenza: The Musical. I can't wait. LOL


Okay. I'm experimenting with this movable type thingamajigger. Rina's letting me play with her blog. This is Kate, by the way. I guess this isn't as scary as it actually had seemed to me... maybe I will be switching over from Blogger.

Continue reading "Experimenting" »

slashy fun and plans

Oh, I can't believe I forgot! I was walking to get my 700 page course pack for Monday's class, and passed the video store. I actually gasped, but managed to contain my squeal. The second poster was for Queer as Folk!!! I can rent the entire season one!!!!! I cannot believe I am going home this weekend! ARGH! LOL I know I'm going to love my play tomorrow night, but I could have had a QaF marathon tomorrow and then watched the Xena one on Sunday. How annoying is that? LOL And then next weekend, I have to come back up with Kate to get nsync tickets. And depending on when we come back after that, I might have plans with Nee to watch anime on Sunday. So I'm having to wait until February 9 to watch. Unless I rent on Sunday when I come back, and watch Monday and Tuesday mornings. Which I could do, except I should have work to do instead. Hmmmm. <.g>

Okay, anyway. LOL What do I have to do today? I have to pack. I have to read for Monday's classes. I have to review this week's 376 notes. I have to watch nsync on Clueless. LOL Is that really it? I keep thinking I'm missing something rather important. Hopefully it'll come to me!

January 24, 2002

Kate and Darrin

Be proud, Kate. <.g> I called MusicSpace about the status of the tape...the lady was quite nice. Apparently, we should have gotten it yesterday. LOL Also, since they didn't give me the shipping I asked for, I need to call back tomorrow to talk about a refund on that. So that's cool. Hopefully it'll come today then. <.g>

Once again, I had SO much fun with my discussion class. He reminds me so much of Erin and Carol's mom, it's funny. <.g> And we started talking about our project for the class...we're supposed to interview and collect data on someone who's different from us. Different race, sexuality, religion, background, etc. It seems pretty cool, and I think it'll be really interesting. I just have to pick a topic. <.g> Any ideas?

So, let's see...I did my edpsych homework, did the ASHA thing for Monday, and called MusicSpace. All that I have left is to eavesdrop on a five minute conversation and write it down verbatim, and I think I'll do that during class today. LOL Then tomorrow I have to buy my course packs after class, pack, and do some reading for Monday's classes before heading to the train station. I have a play this weekend!! ::bounces:: Agatha Christie. I'm *very excited. And dad will be gone on a retreat all of Saturday, so it's just me and mom with Josh. But all of us are going to the zoo on Sunday morning, which should be really fun.

So, I guess I'll crash with some Tylenol (stupid cramps...I just got *done with my period! LOL) and watch some soaps before I have to leave at 2:40. <.g>


When I was lying in bed after my alarm had gone off, I realized that I was not only hearing MY alarm, but the guy's next door. His is an obnoxious beeping thing, that I can STILL hear. LOL Silly boy, wake up!

OKay, I totally forgot to do my linkage assignment yesterday. UGH! I knew there was something I needed to do. So I need to do that by 11 today. And then there's my assignment for writing class tonight...eavesdrop on a conversation and copy it verbatim. I think I'll do that during class today, or maybe I'll head to the Espresso Royalle between classes. I think it's a super fun assignment, I just generally don't have time to go someplace where I can eavesdrop in the middle of the week. <.g>

Oh, sad ER....with the guy who's boyfriend is HIV positive and is insistent that the guy keep exposing himself to it so that they can be sick together. Malucci was great in those scenes, though. I miss him greatly. And Dr. Kovac with Bishop Stewart. I loved them.

January 23, 2002


My mom sent me this link to draw a simple dolphin. How well can you do it? Mine looks like a deranged bird, but I used a pen so I couldn't erase and shade. <.g>